COLD SNAP

02/07/2007

A two tone brown station wagon pulls up and Johnny Rotten with Jeff Fox step out. Johnny grabs his bag and is about to walk towards the building when he stops and goes back to the wagon opening the rear door as if searching for something.

JEFF FOX: Johnny c'mon... We gotta go.

ROTTEN: Just a second... [To himself] It has to be here. It just has to.

Fox smiles slightly to himself which he covers with his hand when Johnny turns around.

ROTTEN: Are you sure you haven't seen it?

JEFF FOX: That studded collar thing... I told you, I haven't seen it. We'll look for it when we get back to Edmonton.

Johnny sighs. His face screams defeat as he walks past Fox towards the entrance of the arena. A few fans try to stop Johnny for an autograph, but the dejected wrestler walks past as if they weren't even there.

A video package plays highlighting the feuds and matches for tonight set to Demon Hunter's "One Thousand Apologies." The logo for Cold Snap comes up and it is time to head to the ring. Over a thousand screaming fans in Vancouver, BC, have packed the armory here for New Alberta Pro and one of the biggest cards in this young promotion's short history.

BILL HEWSON: WELCOME EVERYBODY TO NAPW COLD SNAP! I'm Bill Hewson alongside Jack "Attack" Jones and what a show we are bring to you tonight. Several huge matches with long-term implications go down tonight, Jack Attack, give us your thoughts.

JACK JONES: It rains too much in Vancouver! But tonight, there are four key matches to keep your on. ONE: The New & Improved D-X take on Midnight Cowboys, tag titles on the line, and if D-X lose they will NO LONGER be allowed to team! TWO: The Doomriders! The Untouchables Chris Casino & Krenshov! FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE IN WESTERN CANADA! What more needs to be said? THREE: Evan Cartwright defends the NAPW Title against RAVAGER! FOUR: R. Joseph Winchell III, our esteemed owner, will WRESTLE Mr. Canada tonight --- mask vs ownership!

BILL HEWSON: Right you are, those four matches absolutely huge to the future of New Alberta Pro Wrestling. But that is not even all of it! Let's go to the ring for our first match in NAPW's ever-hot tag team division!

FRANK WARBURTON: The following tag team match is scheduled for one fall...

BOOOONGGGGG....Fast paced salsa music signals the coming of Sakai, Santiago, and manager Leo Mack, the Next Generation! The international superstars look poised and ready for their match at COLD SNAP,which is also their NAPW PPV debut and after their showing against the Untouchables the fans are definitely on thier side.

FRANK WARBURTON: Introducing first, from Tokyo, Japan, and Mexico City, Mexico... weighing in at a combined three hundred and seventy-seven pounds, NEXT GENNNNNEEEERRRRRRRRR-RRRAAAAATIIOOON!

JACK JONES: This is going to be a replay of the Tuesday Night Fights match against the Untouchables, Hewson. There's just no way that the Sakai and Santiago can overcome the size and strength and downright meaness of Kevin Kodiak and Legion.

BILL HEWSON: Physically, Next Generation might not match-up with Kodiak and Legion; but when it comes to heart and competitive drive they stack up to any as they proved last Tuesday. I think they could possibly win tonight.

JACK JONES: Don't be making jokes at a time like this, Hewson. These two curtain jerkers don't a chance tonight. Hell, after what The Untouchables put them through I'd be surprised if this match went 3 minutes --- if it does, Next Generation should consider it a moral victory! That's the only kind of victory they'll get tonight.

BILL HEWSON: That's your opinion but I think you're dead wrong...again it should be a great match.

The strange mix of "Frankenstein" and "Bodies" starts to play throughout the arena as Kevin Kodiak and his somewhat unlikely partner come out to a mixed reaction.

BILL HEWSON: Here come the opponents for Next Gen, Jack Attack, one of the new and maybe the most unlikely tag team in NAPW Kodiak and Legion.

JACK JONES: That's true. Kodiak is a suck-up to these fans and Legion while a charismatic blackhole is a badass pure and simple. And tonight they'll make short work of Sakai and Santiago, I can guarantee you that.

FRANK WARBURTON: And their opponents,from Salmon River, British Columbia and Death Valley, California... weighing in at a combined total of five-hundred and fifty-seven pounds the team of KEVIN KODIAK...AND LEGIONNNNN!

We have again one of the biggest size differentials in NAPW history - Legion and Santiago! Santiago stares up at Legion, and the crowd immediately rises to it's feet. They're chating his name. As he fires shot after shot to the gut! Legion shoves him back, dropping Santiago to the mat. Santiago pops up,and gets hit with a shoulder block by Legion, Santiago on the mat looks around, and springs up with a basement dropkick! That gets Legion in the midsection dropping him to one knee, and Santiago runs past him and springboards - OH MY GOD Legion gets up, and looks, well, pissed off. Go figure, right? He catches the luchador as Santiago comes off the ropes and slams him down hard in the middle of the ring. Santiago lands with a sickening thud squirming on the mat as Legion grabs him by the back of the head and tosses him into his corner. Legion gets head and crashes into Next Gen's corner hitiing both Santiago and Sakai, and Legion drags over Santiago across the ring and tags in Kodiak. Santiago is lifted for a suplex by Kodiak but gets out of it and as Kodiak turns he is met with a spinning heelkick by Santiago, to the massive approval of the crowd! Legion with a cheapshot from the ring apron - but Santiago refuses to stay down! He slides through the legs of the charging Kodiak, who's dumbfounded by the blinding speed of this tough young luchador! Kodiak looks and turns around just in time to eat a dropkick from Santiago. Santiago quickly climbs the ropes as Kodiak falls and comes off the ropes with suicidal flying headbutt AND HE CONNECTS!

The crowd cheers as Santiago helps Kodiak to his feet and whips him into the ropes. Kodiak rebounds, Santiago catches him with a Hurracanrana! Legion comes in the ring illegally and levels Santiago with a massive clothesline. Kodiak looks a little disapprovingly at Legion, who pantomimes dusting off his hands as he leaves the ring again. SANTIAGO IS BACK ON HIS FEET, and this place has just exploded! KODIAK turns around, is met by a charging Santiago with a Tornado DDT! Next Generation so far looking great againt Kodiak. Santiago covers Kodiak, and immediately is pulled off by an angry Legion, who yells "GET UP!" at his partner who comes over and tags him in the match. Legion looking disgusted,he grabs Santiago,Legion's pissed off now, and buries a knee into Santiago's gut. He's not about to get shown up by some cruiserweight wrestler! He picks Santiago up overhead and drops him with a hard backbreaker, and Santiago's writhes in pain on the mat. The boos reign down on him, but Legion quickly stomps down on his opponent's chest before picking him up and putting him back down with a brutual sidewalk slam. He pops right up and picks Santiago up again, only to rattle his skeleton with a hard hitting vertical suplex! drags Santiago by the leg over to his corner, and tags Kodiak back in. Kevin steps through the rope and picks Santiago up and running him across the ring with a powerslam, that's gotta be it for Santiago! The cover from Kodiak...One....twoooooooo........thee-kickout! Legion is IRATE now, and he's yelling at referee John Sharplin's face! Sharplin is yelling that it was "just two, Legion" as Santiago starts to get up, the fans can't even believe it now, but he's getting up and crawling over to Sakai!

BILL HEWSON: Santiago has a lot of heart, a lot of guts, but he desperately needs to make the tag to his partner Sakai. He can only take so much more of this punishment, we saw that truth demonstrated last week on TNF.

JACK JONES: And just like on TNF, Next Generation is going to LOSE, Hewson! That's truth.

BILL HEWSON: It ain't over til it's over!

Sakai leans over the ropes, trying to reach out to his partner, but Legion notices Santiago's attempt from the corner of his eye and charges into the ring puts a stop to it by distracting the ref who disallows the tag made by Next Gen. The referee and Kodiak get Legion out of the ring as Kodiak then throws a forearm at Santiago, and hits him square in the head, stunning the Masked Man. Hard slam puts Santiago back on the mat. Kodiak picks up Santiago yet again, this time plants him hard with a vertical suplex. He goes for the pin but in too close to the ropes and Santiago gets a ropebreak! Wracked with pain, Santiago crawls under the bottom rope, but he's on the wrong side of town. Legion runs over him with a sick shoulder tackle in the ribs as hard as he can, flipping him over onto his back. Legion picks up Santiago and throws him into the ringsteps, the crowd boos the hell out of him as he slides Santiago back into the ring. Kodiak is waiting,asking Legion what that was all about. Kodiak walks over to his corner and Legion tells to concentrate on the match.. YES! Santiago with a lungblower How the hell did he do that? Santiago tries to make it to his corner that last took all he had as he crawls to his corner. Sakai watches on, helpless, as Kodiak regains his feet.He stalks Santiago and catches up to him and picks himup for a powerbomb but Santiago rains punch after punch on the top of Kodiak's head finally causing Kodiak to put him back down. And the fans are EATING. IT. UP! Santiago needs desperately to get to his corner to make a tag, but he just can't find the energey to crawl over.

BILL HEWSON: COME ON KID, YOU CAN DO IT! GET UUUUUPPPP!

JACK JONES: And I thought *I* was bad at being impartial, yeesh. Kill him already, Legion!

Santiago crawls, moving just inches forward. The sold out crowd is on its feet, and this place might not be able to contain the cheers coming from deep down inside them! "SANTI-AGO!" CLAP CLAP CLAP-CLAP-CLAP! "SANTI-AGO!" CLAP CLAP CLAP-CLAP-CLAP! "SANTI-AGO!" CLAP CLAP CLAP-CLAP-CLAP! - The crowd goes on like that for what feels like ages, and Santiago is almost there - he's on one knee, reaching for Sakai - Sakai leans out, ready for the tag...here it comes, he's got him - NO! Kodiak catches him but Santiago fires a kick to Kodiak's mid-section, Kodiak catches his foot. NO WAIT ENZUGIRI! and this crowd comes to life again over that move. Santiago's and Sakai's hands were literally INCHES away from each other. Kodiak grabs Santiago up, and whips him all the way across the ring with a bone-cracking Irish whip to the corner the back of Santiaog's head bounces off the top turnbuckle, taking out the rest of the life Santiago has left in him. A quick tag to Legion, and it looks like this thing is finally going to come to a head. Legion doesn't play around at all,and starts stomping the life out of Santiago. Legion picks Santiago up and places him on the top rope. OH MY GOD HE GOING FOR A SUPERPLEX! If he hits this, the match and maybe Santiago's career is over! But wait - Santiago shifts his weight as Legion has him overhead..TORNADO DDT FROM THE TOP TURNBUCKLE! MY GOD WHAT A MOVE. Both men are down! Legion starts to rise but Santiago with a late surge scampers across the ring and

HOT TAG!

PANDEMONIUM! AND HERE COMES SAKAI, HE'S A BRICK(BLEEP)HOUSEAFAR! BOOM BOOM BOOM, palm strikes rattle the ex-ranger! Buzzsaw kick to the knee bring him down - THWACK! Another one right to the head, Legion falls to the mat, my goodness! Kodiak steps in and charges with an attempted spear! Ducked by Sakai, and he gets creamed with a shining wizard! Kodiak bounces off the ropes, right into Sakai's waiting arms - EXPLODER SUPLEX! THE CROWD EXPLODES AS WELL ON IMPACT, and Sakai nips up, giving a big HIIIIII-YAAAAAAAAAH! Kodaik rolls out of the ring, but Legion from behind. Sakai sees him coming, dodges a big boot and feeds him a leg - DRAGON WHIP Legion goes down hard,and you can see the stream of sweat and spit fly from his face. Sakai is like a man possessed, Legion dazed, and misses with a wild left hook - Sakai ducks and hits another Shining Wizard, and after picking Legion up he caps it with a back suplex, high and tight! Legion bounces off the mat slams into the mat, and Santiago leaps up to the top rope!

BILL HEWSON: BOARDING FOR AIR MEXICO!

EL MOVIMENTO ESPACULAR! He got all of it, Sakai for the cover! ONE! TWO!..........THREEEEEEEEEE NO NO NO! Legion kicked out at the last second, sending Sakai into the air and crashing back down to the mat! Santiago waits for Legion to get up, and LEAPS onto the top rope, flying bulldog from the middle of the ropes! WAIT LEGION CATHCES HIM!Legion throws Santiago to the arena floor.Sakai and Legion are now alone in the ring to fight it out. Legion strecthes his back and nods to his opponent one warrior to another. Sakai puts his fist into his palm, and gives a deep, respectful bow to his opponent. They lock-up collar and elbow. Armbar from Legion and he's bearing down on it.Sakai reverses and slides through Legion's legs and pulls off a double leg takedown - REAR NAKED CHOKE! HE'S GOT HIM IN THE CHOKE, MIDDLE OF THE RING WITH NOWHERE TO GO! The fans are going bananas, but will Legion tap? Kodiak doesn't wait to find out and breaks it up stomping Sakai on head hard. The fans immediately boo, they think Legion was about to tap the hell out! Kodiak leaves the ring well before the five count. Legion makes it back to his feet, turns around, right into a TOP ROPE MOONSAULT FROM SANTIAGO, and he goes down like a ton of bricks! Everyone is down but Santiago, who goes back to his corner, begging for Sakai to get over and make a tag so he can finish off Legion! Sakai is up, he's crawling, trying to reach Santiago but Legion grabs him and delivers a brutual spinebuster. Legion makes it to his corner and tags in Kodiak. Sakai's face meets Kodiak's boot and the former lumberjack throws some chops, trying to clearcut his opponent. On the outside, Legion has run around the ring --- heyanks Santiago off the apron and they start to brawl. Legion pounds the much smaller man and throws him back into the ring, where Kodiak slams then drops an elbow on Santiago!

Kodiak looks down at Sakai, and kicks him twice with his boot. No movement. Kodiak signals and climbs to the top turnbuckle. Legion askes Kodiak what the hell he's doing. Kodiak takes time to play to the crowd. Then he leaps off with a top rope splash. No SAKAI GETS HIS KNEES UP AND KODIAK IS DOWN. Legion starts into the ring SHINING WIZARD! Sakai just NAILED him, knocking Legion to the outside! . Santiago it back in the ring and both members on NEXT GEN climb the turnbuckles in opposite corners! They leap off... EL GRANDE FROGGY CONNECTS! Santiago with the cover... One, two, three, HOLY (BLEEP)!

FRANK WARBURTON: HERE ARE YOUR WINNERS...SAKAI AND SANTIAGO,NEXT GENERATION!

BILL HEWSON: SANTIAGO GOT THE! NO, NO WAY! Are you a believer yet, Jack Attack?

JACK JONES: I can't believe it. The midget got the pin on Kodiak.

BILL HEWSON: What did I tell you, Jack Attack? Sometimes it all comes down to the size of a wrestlers heart and not their biceps! JACK JONES: As much as I hate to say it, Hewson, you were right. Did you see Sakai? He was like a machine, again tearing through them like it was nothing! Incredible, just incredible!

Next Generation are joined by Leo Mack on the outside, who is EXULTANT. "I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT! NO WRESTLER TOO BIG OR TOO STRONG AGAINST YOU TWO!" Santiago embraces Mack, Next Generation have earned a huge victory.

In the ring Kevin Kodiak has gotten to his feet. He's tired, and obviously disappointed in the loss. He sighs --- wait a minute, Legion just whipped him around. Words between the two partners now? Kodiak trying to let it go and leave, Legion isn't letting him. "It's just one loss man." BOOM! LEGION JUST SLUGGED HIS PARTNER! KODIAK FIRES BACK!

BILL HEWSON: Wait a minute --- these two men are going at it! So much for "if you can't beat them, join them" Kodiak and Legion look like they're done tagging!

JACK JONES: Legion doesn't need his dead weight!

Security rushes out to break things up. These two powerhouses are going to be hard to separate...

Backstage, the NAPW camera sneaks past a half opened locker room door and catch a shot of Johnny Rotten and Jeff Fox, as Johnny applies the last of his black makeup around his eyes.

ROTTEN: Your really gonna have to earn you money tonight Jeff... I gotta feeling I'm really going to need you.

JEFF FOX: That's my job kid. Trust me... [Sly gin] I'm here for you.

ROTTEN: That's good Jeff... Cause I'm not feeling to good about this match.

JEFF FOX: Is this about that stupid collar?

ROTTEN: [Meek] It isn't stupid... I can't explain it, but it's important to me.

Rotten turns to face the mirror for one last checkover and in the background you can see Jeff Fox slip Johnny's Studded Collar from his coat pocket into Johnny's gym bag.

JEFF FOX: Did you check your bag?

ROTTEN: Yeah, of course...

JEFF FOX: [Non-chalant] What's this?

Jeff pulls the collar out and Johnny's demeanour changes dramatically. Grabbing the collar with one hand, he hugs Fox with the other.

ROTTEN: Thank you man... You'll never know how important this is.

JEFF FOX: [Undertone] I think I'm starting to. [Pause] So you gonna put this O'Brien kid to bed now or what?

ROTTEN: [Pumped] Hell yeah...!

The crowd settles down as Frank Warburton clears his throat.

FRANK WARBURTON: The following contest is scheduled for one fall...Introducing first, weighing in at two-hundred and twenty-eight pounds, from Bradford, England...Jay O'Brien!!

"Techno Sonic Sunshine" by ISOR begins booming and the crowd instantly begins to boo. Jay O'Brien steps out from behind the curtain and look straight at the ring, not paying an ounce of attention to the crowd. He makes his way to the ring and stretches a little.

FRANK WARBURTON:And his opponent, weighing in at two-hundred and five pounds, from Wasaga Beach, Ontario...Johnny Rotten!

"Fallen Leaves" by Billy Talent begins playing and the crowd begins to cheer as Johnny Rotten makes his way to the ring, Jeff Fox trailing behind him. He slaps a few hands but mainly keeps his eyes fixated on Jay O'Brien, he steps into the ring and looks Jay square in the eye.

BILL HEWSON: Two undefeated wrestlers going at it tonight. The fans like Johnny Rotten here...

JACK JONES: Who cares what these Vancouver peons think? Jay O'Brien's a smart kid, he's on the side of Truth and Justice.

BILL HEWSON: You can't possibly be referring to Joseph Winchell.

JACK JONES: He'll go far!

The bell rings and it's on! Johnny Rotten and Jay O'Brien begin to circle each other and they lock up! Traditional Collar-Elbow tie-up. Jay O'Brien gains the advantaged and latches in a headlock, Rotten pushes him off and its back to the Collar-Elbow tie-up. This time Johnny gains control and slaps on an arm wringer. O'Brien winces in pain as Johnny sends a forearm to his shoulder. Rotten is being unusually technical here and gives Rotten another forearm then lets go of the arm wringer and Spinning Wheel Kick! Ducked! Dropkick by O'Brien! Rotten is quickly back up to his feet and right into another dropkick! O'Brien covers but gets a one and a half. He grabs hold of Rotten and drags him over to the ropes. Slingshot elbow drop! Rotten rolls out of the way and running Shooting Star Press! Cover! Only gets a one! Rotten gets up and goes to the apron. O'Brien shoots up to his feet and grabs hold of Johnny who gives him a knee to the midsection. Sunset Flip! One! Two! O'Brien reverses and gets a pin. One! Two! Rotten sends him to his back and One! Two! O'Brien rolls out, grabs Rottens legs and flips forward. One! Two! Rotten kicks out and gets his own pin. One! Two! Thre- O'Brien manages to get out and Enziguri nearly knocks Johnny Rotten unconscious.

BILL HEWSON: What a series of pinning reversals there, but O'Brien managed to tag Johnny Rotten good!

JACK JONES: You think that was something, watch this.

O'Brien drags Johnny to the center of the ring and climbs to the top turnbuckle...Moonsault! No one home! Rotten makes it out at the last second and Springboard Moonsault...Connects! One! Two! Thre- Shoulder up! Rotten gets to his feet and gives O'Brien a stiff kick to chest before rolling him over to his stomach. Rotten off the ropes flipping senton! O'Brien rolls out of the way, jumps to his feet and Texas Cloverleaf! The fast past action ends abruptly as Jay O'Brien locks in on of the most painful submissions in professional wrestling. He makes sure to sit right on the back of Johnny Rotten and pull back as far as humanly possible. Rotten continues to scream and struggle to make it to the ropes but to no avail. They are in the middle of the ring after all. But just when it seems like Johnny no longer has any fight in him he PUSHES himself up and leaps! Ropebreak! Jay O'Brien can't believe this. He sends a hard kick to the back of Rottens head and lifts him to his feet. O'Brien with the Irish whip, Rotten reverses and its O'Brien being whipped, Jay rebounds and goes for a clothesline! Its ducked by Rotten and Backflip kick! O'Brien is nearly beheaded and collapses down to the mat. Johnny Rotten doesn't waste any time and brings O'Brien back to his feet and sends him to the corner with a hard Irish whip and then rushes...Right into a boot! Jay O'Brien quickly takes control of the match and Irish whips Johnny Rotten, Rotten rebounds and O'Brien falls to the mat letting Johnny pass, then he pops up to his feet lighting fast and rebounds off the ropes himself, the two are heading toward each other fast...O'Brien with the crossbody! ITS CAUGHT! The crowd pops and Table Top Suplex! Rotten into the ropes... Springboard Moonsault CONNECTS!

BILL HEWSON: COVER... O'BRIEN GETS THE SHOULDER UP!

JACK JONES: Oh thank God, I mean, I knew he could do it. C'mon kid, daddy needs a new pair of loafers!

Unbelievable! Johnny Rotten is shocked and O'Brien doesn't know where he is. Rotten grabs a handful of O'Brien's hair and lifts him to his feet. He whips O'Brien into the ropes and comes at him with a clothesline...O'Brien ducks! Rotten turns around and SUPERKICK! Johnny Rotten's head bobbles and he collapses. O'Brien could end this if he wanted to! But he's going to the top! Shooting Star Press! Rotten rolls out of the way...O'Brien lands on his feet! O'Brien laughs and points to his head in a way to mock Rotten due to the fact he was outsmarted. Rotten rushes! O'Brien throws a roundhouse and its ducked! Springboard Elbow by Rotten and BLAM! It connects right with the back of O'Brien's head. Rotten grabs another handful of O'Brien's hair and drags him to the center of the ring and lifts him up -counter!- Small Package by O'Brien! One! Two! Thre- Rotten breaks out at the last second! Morgan Smythe says its a two count and Jay O'Brien is ANGRY! He just can't believe it! He begins to argue with Morgan Smythe...

BILL HEWSON: Jay O'Brien turning his back on his opponent, he's got to keep his eyes on his opponent and not the referee! Rotten with a modified Sleeper Slam!

Johnny Rotten grabs O'Briens head and looks him in the eye says "Who's smarter now?" then lifts O'Brien to his feet sends him into the corner. Rotten rushes and Shining Wizard! O'Brien slumps down into the corner and receives a stiff soccer kick to the chest. Rotten then grabs him and throws hims parallel to the corner and PICTURE PERFECT Split Legged Moonsault! Cover! One! Two! and Thre- O'Brien got his foot on the rope! Rotten looks on in disbelief as Morgan Smythe says its a two count. But Johnny doesn't let it bug him for two long because he's right back at it. A few hard rights to O'Brien and he lifts him back to his feet...Jawbreaker by O'Brien! Rotten falls back and O'Brien takes a breather. Rotten is on all fours and slowly makes his way back to his feet and O'Brien NEEDS to capitalize...O'Brien smirks as Rotten gets to his feet...Johnny turns around and WHAM! Superkick nearly beheads Johnny Rotten! And Jay O'Brien yells"You want to know who's the smarter one? Your looking at 'em Johnny!"Jay O'Brien kicks Rotten in the ribs and he rolls over to his stomach...Jay stands over him and...Insatiable Insanity! Its locked in and I don't think Johnny Rotten is going anywhere! He struggles for a little then falls limp. Smythe checks on Rotten and lifts his arm...It drops... She lifts it once more and it drops...Johnny Rotten is out-cold! She lifts it up again and..Unbeknownst to Morgan Smythe, Jeff Fox has just placed Johnny Rottens foot on the rope and begins to yell as if the building is on fire. Morgan still holding Johnny's arm up looks over to see the leg and she calls for a ropebreak...Yet O'Brien thinks he just won the match and jumps onto the corner to celebrate. Johnny Rotten then comes to life...slowly but surely and just in time to see O'Brien climbing onto another corner. O'Brien raises both arms in victory and Rotten rushes and grabs hold of O'Brien and Reverse Hurricanrana off the top! O'Brien crashes down onto the mat and looks dead. Rotten sees a golden opportunity and climbs to the top...540 Splash! It CONNECTS! ONE! TWO! THRE-NO! O'BRIEN BARELY GETS THE SHOULDER UP!

JACK JONES: HOW YA LIKE HIM NOW?

BILL HEWSON: Johnny Rotten can't believe it, this crowd can't believe it! Rotten swore he had O'Brien down for the three!

Johnny Rotten looks at Morgan and his eyes nearly water up as she holds up two fingers. He then grabs hold of O'Brien and lifts him to his feet and hits him with a few hard rights. He then arm drags O'Brien and O'Brien quickly rolls back to his feet and running School Boy! One! O'BRIEN GRABS THE ROPES! TWO! THREEEEE!

FRANK WARBURTON: Here is your winner... JAAAAY O'BRIENNNNN!

BILL HEWSON: What? He had the ropes ---

JACK JONES: What'd I tell you? I LIKE this Jay O'Brien kid!

BILL HEWSON: A tough loss for Johnny Rotten here tonight after one hell of a match, he deserved better than that.

Jeff Fox is furious outside the ring as Jay O'Brien arrogantly preens inside the squared circle to the boos from the fans. Johnny Rotten is pretty disappointed...

FRANK WARBURTON: Ladies and gentlemen the following match is the six man SCRAMBLE match!

Already in the ring are newcomers Marcus Chamberlain and Maxx Extreme. NAPW mainstay Krusty Kid Paul is also out there, leaving only three introductions left to be made...

FRANK WARBURTON: Introducing at this time, hailing from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and weighing in at two hundred and forty four pounds... This... is... DEZ! CAAAAAAARTEEEEER!

BILL HEWSON: Dez Carter out for this six man scramble match, but you know Jack, I'm a little confused...

JACK JONES: You're always a little confused.

BILL HEWSON: Well today there's good reason - Jack "Grey Knight" Saffire apparently handed in his resignation this week, and as best we can tell, he has NOT shown up here tonight!

JACK JONES: So?

BILL HEWSON: So how can this be a six man scramble with only five guys?

FRANK WARBURTON: Introducing the fifth competitor. He hails from Hollywood, Florida, and weighs in at two hundred and twenty eight pounds... DIIIIIIIIO!! MUUUEEERRRTTTTEEEE!!

JACK JONES: Well there's the fifth guy...

BILL HEWSON:: But is he the FINAL guy? We haven't been given any information.

JACK JONES: I have no idea, but I can tell you that that guy RIGHT THERE, is my odds-on favourite to win this match!

BILL HEWSON: Dio's been on a roll, that's for sure!

FRANK WARBURTON: And finally...

JACK JONES: Huh...?

FRANK WARBURTON: He weighs in at two hundred and eighty pounds... He makes his NAPW debut... He. Is. "STOOOOOOOOOORM"! SAM! FINN!

JACK JONES: Who?!

BILL HEWSON: "Storm" Sam Finn is going to take Jack Saffire's place!

JACK JONES: Well I guess that makes sense, but still... who?!

BILL HEWSON: Sam Finn had a lot to say this week, and we're going to see EXACTLY what he's made of, in this, his first match in New Alberta Pro Wrestling!

JACK JONES: Ah, it's not going to make any difference! Dio Meurte - he's got this in the bag!

BILL HEWSON: I don't know, Jack, these scramble matches, they're pretty unpredictable at the best of times!

JACK JONES: Nah.

"Storm" Sam Finn is keen to start this one out and show us what he's got, beckoning someone, anyone, to mix it up with him. Plucky youngster Marcus Chamberlain proves ready and willing, and the two begin to circle one another - as the other four, comprising Dio Muerte, Krusty Kid Paul, Dez Carter and Maxx Extreme, all take up a corner each. No doubt who's the stronger here, either, as Sam Finn, this monster of a man, immediately begins to manhandle Chamberlain! Finn with rights, lefts, and a whip into the ropes... BIG BOOT to the face! Chamberlain clutching his jaw like he just got it dislocated, but "Storm" isn't gonna give him any room to breath, because he's right on him, laying in the heavy boots to the face and chest!

BILL HEWSON: Sam Finn just STOMPING away!

JACK JONES: Hey, I like his attitude! No nonsense, just get out there and beat the crap outta somebody!

BILL HEWSON: He looks fired up for this match, that's for sure!

Finn picks Chamberlain up, and grabs him by the throat! He's signalling with the thumb, pointing up... up... up.... AND ALL THE WAY DOWN! But Chamberlain fighting out of it, vicious elbows to the head of this monster, Sam Finn. Chamberlain now rocking Finn, staggering him... Chamberlain off the ropes, and oh man, he just walked into a HUGE clothesline from "Storm"!! I mean, I've seen some brutal clotheslines in my time, but THAT was just brutal! Sam Finn goes straight for the cover, gets a one, gets a two, gets a kick to the back of the head from Dio Muerte!

BILL HEWSON: It's not gonna be that easy, Finn, you've got four other men to contend with AS WELL!

Finn looks pissed about the intrusion, but remains focused on Marcus, picking him up, twists that arm round, and... out of nowhere, Dez Carter just tagged himself in! He slapped Finn right on the back, and Finn is NOT happy! Dez gives him a little wink, and enters, replacing him as the legal man!

JACK JONES: Sneaky tag by Carter! He just interjected himself into this match!

BILL HEWSON: Well, you know, you can't win it standing on the apron!

JACK JONES: I guess not.

Finn reluctantly takes his place outside, as Carter takes over where the big man left off, drilling Chamberlain with some well placed rights, some to the head, some to the bread basket, and then out come the kicks! Carter, clearly possessing a martial arts background, picks off some sweet shots, staggering Chamberlain back into the ropes... Carter whips Chamberlain off the ropes, and he's ready with a.... NO! Chamberlain sliding under the bottom rope to the outside! Carter looking for a big roundhouse kick, but Chamberlain WISELY saving himself! And because this is scramble rules, that means that Chamberlain's no longer the legal man, and in comes Dio! Dio Muerte calling for Carter to bring it on, and Dez, he's gonna... no! Dez makes the tag out to Krusty Kid Paul!

JACK JONES: He can't do that, can he?!

BILL HEWSON: He sure can! That's smart from the veteran Dez Carter, he wants to remain fresh! This match has only just got underway!

KKP and Dio Muerte about to lock horns, and... no! Krusty Kid Paul brings the knee up, and shuts him down! Krusty Kid Paul wailing away on Dio Muerte... whips Dio into the ropes, and OFF COMES DIO WITH A FLYING FOREARM! Paul down, and Dio like a house of fire, he's picking him up, sending KKP back into the ropes himself, and WHAM! Standing enziguiri connects! NICE move by Dio Muerte! Dio Muerte with the cover, a one count, a two count, but no dice on the three, Paul shooting his shoulder off the mat! Dio wants Paul back up to his feet, and he's grabbed a hold of him... front facelock applied... suplex coming up? BRAINBUSTER! He just laid KKP out! Paul's head bounced off the mat, and he cannot feel good after that one! Dio with the cover, another one, another two, and again Paul gets the shoulder up! This kid is tough! Dio picking KKP up, and he's setting up for a powerbomb! Dio lifts... but no, Paul blocks! Dio tries again, and again, Paul blocks it! KKP isn't going ANYWHERE! Dio hammers Paul on the back HARD, once, twice, THREE TIMES, and now here we go..... SIT OUT POWERBOMB!! Dio Muerte PLANTED Paul with that one! The one, the two, the stomp from Sam Finn! Payback for earlier in the match!

JACK JONES: Ha ha! I love it! Dio Muerte, he thinks he's so smart, but Finn just gave him a taste of his own medicine!

BILL HEWSON: Well it's not legal, but who's keeping track? The action is fast and furious, this is a SCRAMBLE match!

Dio Muerte, he's seen enough, and he tags out to... nobody! Dez Carter drops down from the apron, he isn't ready to enter yet!

JACK JONES: What is he doing?!

BILL HEWSON: I guess Carter's biding his time, I really don't know if that's good strategy or not, but hey, at least he isn't getting hurt!

Dio looks around, and sees Sam Finn's outstretched hand. Finn wants back in, and so Muerte, he -- he tags out to Maxx Extreme!

JACK JONES: It's getting personal between Finn and Muerte, Josh! Dio just tagged in Maxx Extreme instead of him!

BILL HEWSON: You get the feeling this match isn't gonna resolve ANY of the tensions currently felt in that ring! If anything, it's gonna spark even more animosity!

Maxx Extreme is in, and he picks KKP up... but that's all he can do, before "Storm" Sam Finn enters the ring, uninvited! Finn, clearly furious about not getting the tag, nails Maxx in the back of the head, then kicks KKP in the gut... Gut wrench suplex! And Dio Muerte, he's BACK in! And so is Marcus Chamberlain! AND Dez Carter!

JACK JONES: It's all breaking down, Josh!

BILL HEWSON: They are ALL in there, and this one is quickly getting out of hand!

We have got a pier six brawl, and this crowd is LOVING it!! The roar is deafening, as bodies get tossed left, right and centre - first Chamberlain, thrown over the ropes by Carter, then Finn back body drops Maxx Extreme over! AND THERE GOES KKP, HE JUST GOT LAUNCHED BY DIO!! Dio Muerte, Dez Carter, and Sam Finn all staring each other down! Dio and Dez, they're gonna go at it --- NO! They turn, and they are BOTH all over "Storm" Sam Finn like a rash!! Finn being backed up into the ropes, and a DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE sends him sprawling on the outside! We're down to just two, and OH GOD!!! DEZ CARTER JUST DECAPITATED DIO MUERTE WITH A VICIOUS SUPERKICK!!! You could hear that in the States! Hell, you could hear that in England, Japan, Australia - ANY DAMN PLACE!! Dez Carter dumping Dio's prone body on the outside, and what's he thinking?! There's a huddle of bodies on the outside, and Dez, he wants to go airborne!! Carter, takes a run up, and... SUICIDE DIVE!! CLEAN OVER THE TOP, NO HANDS!! "Holy (BLEEP), Holy (BLEEP)!"

JACK JONES: HOLY HELL!

That wiped EVERYONE out!! Well, not quite EVERYONE, I guess, because Finn, he's climbing onto the apron! NO WAY! NO GOD DAMN WAY!!! SAM FINN, HE'S NEAR SEVEN FEET TALL, ALMOST THREE HUNDRED POUNDS... AND HE'S CLIMBING UP TO THE TOP ROPE!

"HOLY (BLEEP)!! HOLY (BLEEP)!!"

And THAT, folks, just KILLED EVERYONE! There are bodies everywhere, after Sam Finn's INCREDIBLE dive from the top rope!! Hell, it wasn't pretty, but good god DAMN, was it effective! Although "Storm" isn't exactly looking a million bucks right about now either!! It is CARNAGE, and the referee has no choice but to start administering a ten count!! The crowd counting along, and we're up to five, six, and we're still counting! Seven, eight, and FINALLY there's a sign of life! "Storm" Sam Finn is getting to his feet! Holy crap!

JACK JONES: THAT MAN IS UNREAL!!

BILL HEWSON: But Dio Muerte, he's up too!

Indeed he is, Dio Muerte is up, and he's stalking Sam Finn! Dio Muerte, NAILS him from behind!! Dio rolling Finn into the ring, and he's going to go for some kind of suplex here... T-BONE!! T-Bone suplex on this giant of a man! What strength... what technique! Dio with the cover!! That could be all!! One...! Two...! Three--- NO!!! "Storm" Sam Finn with the shoulder up!! Dio can't believe it!! But he KNOWS he can win this one, and so he picks Finn up again! Dio Muerte slipping round the back... GERMAN!! GERMAN SUPLEX!! Finn just landed right on his head and neck! Dio Muerte... HE'S CALLING FOR THE END!! He's going for the flipping DDT, the Demortalizer! BUT NO, HERE COMES MAXX EXTREME! Maxx into the ring, and he just caught Dio with a side kick! Dio rolling to the outside now, and he did NOT see that coming! Maxx, he wants to steal it! He's got Finn by the head... NO!!! Finn, like a phoenix, rising from the ashes!! CHOKESLAM ON MAXX EXTREME! "Storm" Sam Finn is fired up!! He's YELLING at Maxx Extreme! He is NOT happy with him, and here we go, the cover... ONE...!! TWO...!! THRE--- DEZ CARTER! DEZ CARTER BREAKS IT UP! Oh my!

BILL HEWSON: This is absolutely incredible, Jack! Sam Finn, so close to a HUGE upset here on his debut!

JACK JONES: Upset? Have you been watching this match? He's the odds on favorite!

BILL HEWSON: But not if Dez Carter or Dio Muerte have anything to do with it!

And indeed Dez Carter DOES have want something to do with it, as he drills Sam Finn with hard rights and lefts... Dez Carter, hooking up Finn... FISHERMAN'S BUSTER! Beautiful move by Dez Carter!! Sam Finn is taking some punishment off those suplexes! Carter kicking Maxx Extreme's limp body out of the ring, and he's looking around... Marcus Chamberlain trying to enter the ring - Cut off by Carter! He just whacked his jaw on the guard rail! Ouch!! Krusty Kid Paul trying to come in! SUPERKICK! Carter, he's loving those kicks tonight! Carter looks down at Dio Muerte on the outside, but he still isn't moving after that shot to the head a few seconds before! And so it's just him and Sam Finn! Carter picking Finn up... CARTER MUSCLING FINN UP... HE'S CALLING FOR THE BURNING HAMMER!

BILL HEWSON: OVERDRIVE...!

JACK JONES: DENIED! Sam Finn just slipped out the back door!

BILL HEWSON: Finn grabbing Carter -- FALCON ARROW!

But Sam Finn cannot capitalize!! He has had the wind knocked out of him! Dez Carter is down! Sam Finn is down!! Everybody is down!! EXCEPT DIO MUERTE!! As if he just rose from the dead, Dio rolls into the ring! He's hurt, he's battered, he's bruised... he's laying an arm across Dez Carter's chest!! ONE.......!!!!! TWO.......!!!! THREE......NO!!! Carter kicked out!! Dio Muerte can't believe it!! But this is his chance!! Dio Muerte picking Dez Carter up... he wants the Demortalizer, and THAT will do it! BUT HERE COMES KKP!! Krusty Kid Paul, he just nailed a big double clothesline! Muerte and Carter down! Krusty Kid Paul kicks them out of the ring, and oh my god, is he gonna steal this?! Paul picking Sam Finn up - BOTTLE OPENER COMING UP...

... NO! Elbows from Finn, he's fighting outta there! He just saved himself! "Storm" Sam Finn turning around, and he is drilling Paul with FURIOUS fists, just lightning fast! Finn, hammering KKP back into the corner, and here we go... superplex coming up! YES! "Storm" Sam Finn with the Symphony of Lightning!

BILL HEWSON: What a move!! What a move by "Storm"!

JACK JONES: That! Is! IT!

It's not it, though, because Storm wants MORE. Finn locks the Shapershooter on in the middle of the ring! KKP is in serious pain, he's trying to reach the ropes... Finn pulls him back! The only hope Paul is for somebody to break up the submission! And that man my be Dio Muerte, trying to get into the ring. On the apron, he's going for a sprinbogard --- Too late! The KKP does the J-O-B on the PPV, he taps out!

FRANK WARBURTON: THE WINNER OF THE MATCH... "STORM" SAM FINNNN!

BILL HEWSON: KKP taps --- Muerte gets the springboard legdrop on top of Sam Finn! Muerte wants a cover but no good, son, the match is over. Big debut for Sam Finn, great showing from Dio Muerte, NAPW management should think about putting them in a singles match.

JACK JONES: NAPW Management who WILL be Joseph Winchell III forever after he defeats Mr. Canada and unmasks him tonight. And that would be a good match.

BILL HEWSON: Folks, we're glad you've joined us tonight on PPV. We're just getting started! Up next we're looking at the TEAM GAUNTLET match. First of all though, a very special look at the career of NAPW legend "THE NEXUS ONE" REX CALIBER.

Cut to a video package on Rex Caliber... why? Good question, Jimmy. The answer is...

Back to ringside. Frank Warburton is in the ring.

FRANK WARBURTON: The following match is the TEAM GAUNTLET ELIMINATION MATCH! First, the rules. One member of each team will begin the match in a one-on-one format. When a wrestler has been pinned, submitted, counted out or disqualified the next member of his team will enter the match. This will continue until all three members of one team have been eliminated! Now, introducing first...

AkForty blasts up and out walks the former NAPW TV Champion, the one and only Jeff James. He looks focused, even a touch cocky as he walks out to the ring. The crowd is mixed for him, appreciative of his hard work in the ring but unsure of The Foundation as a whole.

FRANK WARBURTON: Introducing first, representing THE FOUNDATION... from Chicago Illinois, this is JEFF! JAMES!

BILL HEWSON: Jeff James starting things off for his team, James of course is the most successful TV Champion in NAPW, well, ever! Five defenses, a record-breaking title reign.

JACK JONES: And the only man who could take it from him is another Foundation member, Prince Darko!

BILL HEWSON: Right as rain. Jeff James has declared his intentions to go for the Pure Honor championship in the near future, he is currently the #1 contender. But tonight he needs to look to the present and his first opponent...

FRANK WARBURTON: And his opponent!

METALLICA, baby. And out walks the Big Blue Ass-Kicker hisself, strangely Lyndsey Valentine is not at his side. The crowd gives a nice pop for...

FRANK WARBURTON: From WICLIFFE KENTUCKY, he is "THE ANGRY AMERICAN" MATTHEW KURTIS!

BILL HEWSON: The biggest man in the match by a wide margin is starting things off, and you gotta believe that's a smart decision by Team Kurtis and Nightmare. And after all the attempts The Foundation has made in the past two months to injure Chad and Matt Kurtis, you know both of those boys are seeing this as payback.

JACK JONES: Payback shcmayback. They're all the same when you get them down on the match, Hewson. Jeff James know that, he's beaten Kurtis before, and he's going to do it again right here.

Both men in the ring, ding ding ding. Matthew Kurtis carries a ten-inch, one-hundred and ten pound size advantage over Jeff James - but James has beaten Matthew before. Lock-up, Matt easily shoves James down. Jeff gets up, nods. He tries to tie up again, but then quickly ducks out when Matt engages. James behind Matt, off the ropes, flying forearm... barely nudges Matthew Kurtis. James hits the ropes again, tries another forearm, Matt takes a step backward. James off the ropes again, this time Matthew brings his big right arm to bear, James ducks the clothesline and swings up for a flying crucifix, but he can't get Matthew down --- Kurtis jumps upwards and falls onto his back, squashing James against the canvas. Kurtis covers, only a two count. The Angry American pulls Jeff up and starts firing big soupbones James' way, knocking him into the corner. James tries to cover up, Kurtis is alllll over him with big rights and lefts, rapid fire all over the man's gut and chest. Referee wants them to get out of the corner, so Kurtis obliges with a big irish whip sending James to the other side of the ring FOLLOWUPLARIAT! BOOM! Jeff James crushed into the turnbuckle there, stumbling out. Matthew Kurtis takes a couple big steps to hit the ropes and comes off with a CONFEDERATE CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL! ONE! TWO! James with a kick-out somehow!

BILL HEWSON: And I don't think we have ever seen Matthew Kurtis this dominant in an NAPW ring! He has allowed Jeff James virtually no offense, and if James can't change things soon his team is going to be down a man quickly.

JACK JONES: How many times have you seen Jeff James come back from the edge of defeat? I can tell you at least FIVE times, and that's more than most men. I've only got three, and I'm a legend.

BILL HEWSON: In your own mind. Hold the phone, Matthew Kurtis is setting Jeff James up for the BLUEGRASS BOMB! He hoists him up --- wait a minute Jeff James flips off behind the man! Kurtis with a Yakuza Kick, NOBODY HOME! He just got hung up on the ropes after Jeff James ducked the move, James TO THE TOP ROPE! AND A FLYING CLOTHESLINE TO MATTHEW KURTIS KNOCKS THE ANGRY AMERICAN TO THE OUTSIDE!

The big man crashes to the outside from being caught on the top rope. Jeff James waiting on the inside as the referee begins counting, Matthew landed badly on his leg. The Foundation unsuccessfully attempted to take Matt's leg out several weeks ago, but the injury may have been aggravated, you can see the big leg brace Matt's wearing. Matt gets back in the ring but before he can take his feet James keeps him down with an elbow drop. He grabs the leg and drags it to the ropes, leaping up and DOWN on it. James tries to drag Matthew to the middle of the ring, gets kicked away by the huge, powerful good leg of Kurtis. Matthew limps to a standing position, Jeff James comes off with a jumping superkick to the chin! That doesn't take the bad-ass down, so James goes for a short dropkick to the leg. Matt stumbles but stays up, ending up in the corner. James ascends the corner and fires away on Matthew Kurtis, he's going to take him out. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten punches... and then it's going to be a HURACANRANA --- WAIT A MINUTE! Matthew Kurtis doesn't go over, he's got his arms around James waist! CENTER OF THE RING --- HE HOISTS HIM UP! James suddenly realizes where he is, fires away, but Matt Kurtis won't be stopped! He yanks James up off his shoulders, holds him there, and then delivers one HELL of a BLUEGRASS BOMB! Matthew Kurtis hooks the leg and gets the cover ONE, TWO, THREE! James is out!

BILL HEWSON: That's a pinfall, and Matthew Kurtis has scored a pinfall elimination on Jeff James! And out next for his team... it's going to be the older brother Thomas Young!

JACK JONES: Young being the older brother, of course.

BILL HEWSON: Of course.

Thomas hits the ring at a run, sliding in and trying to take down Matthew Kurtis. Not a good move, Kurtis delivers a couple big right hooks to Thomas. Young stumbles back into the ropes and comes out, SPINEBUSTER! ONE, TWO, Young kicks out. Matthew Kurtis still favoring that right knee, he's obviously looking to put Young away ASAP here. He shoots Thomas into the corner HARD and then hits the ropes as fast as he can, coming out with yet another huge lariat --- Young ducks it? Matthew turns around, Thomas nails the Running STO. Somehow managed to take the big man down, but Young is not quite as outweighed as his younger brother is. He still gives up a ton of size but right now he's got Matthew down. The big man taking his feet, he's up on one knee, but Young quickly off the ropes again with a big boot to the face while he's got Matt at his level. Thomas Young gets behind Matthew, what's this? He wants the Young Cutter, but can he possibly get Matthew Kurtis up for the back suplex? He tries... Matthew shifts his weight forward, Young isn't getting anywhere. Young releases and throws some forearms into Matt's back, then goes low and hits a chopblock. Matt goes down to a knee, tries to get back up, Thomas is circling behind him... he catches the man with another chopblock.

JACK JONES: You see that Hewson? Thomas Young picking up where his brother left off, taking out the knee of the big blue jackass.

BILL HEWSON: The impartial Jack Jones, ladies and gentlemen.

Thomas Young trying to figure out what to do with this big monster though. He gets a cover, but Young still gets out at two without a problem. His leg is damaged but he's still got all the upper-body strength. Young likes to use a powerbomb, he likes a pumphandle slam, he's got little chance of doing that to The Angry American. Thomas gets a headscissors on the canvas to keep things grounded and try to wear out Matthew Kurtis, and probably to try to come up with a new gameplan. Referee checking in, Matt's not about to give it up. Crowd however begins to rally. Thomas scissor-kicks Matt to try to keep him down, but here come the chants. "LET'S-GO-KURT-IS!" Clap clap clapclapclap. Suddenly! Matthew's arm shoots up! It's shaking! Thomas Young shakes his head frantically looking left and right as Matthew Kurtis comes alive. Kurtis still in the headscissors, but he's moving on the canvas --- WHOA! He just reached out with a long arm and grabbed Young around the throat! Thomas trying to hold on, but it's to no avail as Matthew Kurtis begins to take his feet one big paw wrapped around Young's throat. They're up... Thomas tries to fight out, he hits the ropes, CAUGHT AGAIN! CHOKESLAM! Matthew Kurtis unable to capitalize immediately, now he gets the cover ONE, TWO, TH---Young kicks out! Unbelievable! Thomas Young looked damn near unconscious but somehow he kicked out of that one. Matthew Kurtis would have liked to end it there. Gamely, he takes his feet again, limping more noticeably than ever. He uses the ropes to pull himself up. He's giving himself a moment to get it all back together as Thomas Young slowly stands up. Young is up... he's facing the wrong way. He turns around... Kurtis steps out and manages to boot Thomas in the gut without losing his footing. Standing headscissors as Matthew Kurtis raises an arm high, signalling for Bluegrass Bomb #2! He hauls Thomas up, Thomas fighting but he gets flipped. UP HIGH --- HIS LEG GIVES OUT! Thomas Young falls down as Matthew loses his footing. Matthew down to one knee, he ends up on the side of the ring and pulls himself up by the ropes... Thomas Young with a charging lariat! He stuns Matt! Another one, Matt this time body drops Thomas over the top rope --- no, Thomas lands on the ring apron. Matthew with a battle yell gets a mini-charge, Thomas pulls the top rope down and Big Blue tumbles to the outside and past the protective mats into the concrete of the aisle. Young leaning against the ring apron breathing heavily as Matthew Kurtis clutches his knee. The replay clearly shows that he landed first on the bad leg, that was a bad spill. The referee is making his count...Young gets it together and rolls into the ring. Matthew is trying to get up, trying to get back, but he's clearly tweaked his knee. He takes a big step to the ring apron and stumbles again... the referee counts eight, Matthew reaches out... nine, Matthew grabs the bottom rope... TEN!

JACK JONES: Now that's THINKING MAN'S WRESTLING! I can't tell you how many matches I won by count-out!

BILL HEWSON: Jones, you LOST more matches by count-out than the Honky Tonk Man.

JACK JONES: Hey, Thomas Young saw the situation and took advantage of it. And that means this match is even and The Foundation is ahead.

BILL HEWSON: Even and ahead...? In any event, the next wrestler is coming out --- here comes "THE SHOW!" Chad Kurtis heading to the ring.

Chad stopping in the aisle where Lyndsey Valentine and an official have come out to check on Matt. Matt says "just go man, do it." They touch knuckles and The Show looks at the ring where Thomas Young is. Chad's face of course covered in a protective faceguard to prevent his broken nose from suffering any more damage, a guard painted with the design of a Phoenix. Kurtis looks out to the crowd, getting them riled up... "YOU WANT THE SHOW?" "YEAHHHH!" Kurtis revs up and sprints to the ring, hopping onto the ring-apron to the ropes to the SPRINGBOARD DROPKICK in one fluid motion! He nails a slow-to-react Thomas Young, cover, ONE, TWO, Young kicks out. Chad Kurtis pulls Young up and gets behind with a German Suplex, Young fights and gets a standing switch, BACK SUPLEX ---> YOUNG CUTTER! ONE, TWO, Chad kicks out. Young pulls Chad Kurtis up, what's he going for here? Young now with an opponent he can lift, he wants Shades of Death --- Kurtis isn't going to give it to him. They struggle, then Kurtis is behind Young! GERMAN SUPLEX!

BILL HEWSON: A GERMAN SUPLEX! Chad Kurtis has the hands locked, he holds on... another one! He likes these in threes... Thomas Young struggling, but here's a THIRD german suplex in a row!

JACK JONES: Oh my gawd!

BILL HEWSON: Thomas Young is out on the canvas, watch THE SHOW --- BEST! MOONSAULT! EVER! THE BME CONNECTS! ONE! TWO! NOOOOO!

JACK JONES: That was a close three count but did you see Young kick-out? Chad Kurtis isn't going to be able to put him away!

Kurtis holds up two fingers, referee says three. Chad's okay with that though, because he's got Young reeling. He fires off some shots on Young, whoa, Young fires back. FIREFIGHT IN THE MIDDLE. This is amazing! These two are just killing each other! Both men slowing down here... Young with a shot. Kurtis takes it... wait for it... fires back! That one sends Young stumbling to the ropes. He rebounds out slowly, Kurtis boots him, rolls his hands, CK FINALE coming up! Young with a double leg takedown instead, hits a catapult!

BILL HEWSON: Chad Kurtis face-first into the turnbuckle, Thomas Young with a standing headscissors of his own, DEAD END --- OH MY GAWWWWWD! CK FINALLLLLLLE! KURTIS COUNTERED! KURTIS COUNTERED! UNBELIEVABLLLLLE!

JACK JONES: That---THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE!

BILL HEWSON: THE MOST AMAZING MOVE I MAY HAVE EVER SEEN! THE COVER! ONE! TWO! TH---

JACK JONES: HOLEEEE HELLLL!

BILL HEWSON: NIGHTMARE JUST PULLED THE REFEREE OUT OF THE RING! WHAT THE HELL --- HIS TEAMMATE HAD THE FALL! --- HE PUNCHED THE REF OUT!

JACK JONES: ... I don't know what the hell is going on in his mind, but I kinda like it!

BILL HEWSON: Chad Kurtis now is yelling at Nightmare, he wants a damn explanation! Nightmare OH MY GOD CHAIR SHOT! HE JUST BLASTED CHAD KURTIS IN THE FACE WITH A STEEL CHAIR!

Kurtis reels backwards. Nightmare hauls the referee up and rolls him back in, yelling to wake up. Meanwhile in the ring Thomas Young has groggily got to his feet, no idea what just happened. All he knows is that he sees Chad Kurtis getting up holding his face. One Shades of Death later and the also groggy referee is making the three count on Chad Kurtis.

BILL HEWSON: Chad Kurtis has been eliminated... I mean thanks to his own partner! Nightmare has gone insane these past few weeks!

JACK JONES: OR HAS HE?

BILL HEWSON: He just cost his own partner --- WAIT A MINUTE! NIGHTMARE IS IN THE MATCH! DREAMCATCHERRRRRR! THOMAS YOUNG WALKED RIGHT INTO IT! COVER! ONE! TWO! THREE!

JACK JONES: Now THAT is brilliant, isn't it? Nightmare has finally figured it out --- in this business, you look out for number one! You can't depend on anybody else! Nightmare got the pinfall on Thomas Young and now... there's only one man left to run!

And that man is the Television Champion, Prince Darko. Nightmare with a sick grin on his face. Wait a second, what's he doing in the corner? The referee is trying to recover, he still doesn't realize exactly what happened to him. Nightmare just ripped off the turnbuckle cover as Darko is checking on Thomas Young. The Prince takes off the TV Belt and locks eyes with Nightmare, and strangely the crowd is suddenly altered. Nightmare is getting boos like a shitstorm, and Darko? The crowd goes NUTS when Darko slides into the ring. Nightmare stomps him getting up but Darko isn't having any of it. Darko takes Nightmare down and just REEFS on him in the face rightrightrightright, is that a black Austin? Holy shit. Darko gets up and yells "BITCH!" before catching a rising Nightmare with a hell of a Running DDT! The TV Champion is fired up baby! Nightmare however, he rises up? Darko says "Oh HELLL no" and immediately rushes again, Nightmare catches him, irish whip, reversed, SPINEBUSTER! Darko drops an elbow and covers for one, two, didn't get him. Nightmare powers out of that one. Darko rushes --- BOOM. Nightmare catches him with a boot to the face. Darko turns and stumbles out of the corner but doesn't get very far as Nightmare suddenly latches on the crossface chicken-wing!

BILL HEWSON: We've seen Nightmare using this move to great effect as of late! Prince Darko has to get the ropes or he will have to tap out, there's no two ways about it!

JACK JONES: ... I don't know which decision I want. Dammit!

Nightmare tries to get on the full body-scissors, but Darko is trying to fight it off. No, it's on! Darko has no place to go unless he can possibly...he tries...he's trying to move... he gets a foot on the bottom rope! The referee calls for a break and --- well, Nightmare just snarled at him. But he breaks at four lest he gets DQed. Unfortunately for Darko, that doesn't lead to a cessation of punishment. Nightmare grabs the man by the arm SHORT-ARM CLOTHESLINE with such force Nightmare follows Darko down to the canvas for one, two, kick-out by the TV Champion. Title not on the line of course, but this match is about PRIDE for months of anger and issues between all these men, down to just two. Nightmare stomps Prince Darko repeatedly and then pulls him up. What's this? IRISH WHIP to the corner ! Darko stops short of smashing into the exposed steel, Nightmare charges, Darko side-steps! Nightmare crashes sternum first into the steel! He staggers backwards holding his chest as Darko suddenly sees his opportunity! He scuttles behind Nightmare and then... OVER! AND! OUT! Darko gets the move! He covers! ONE! TWO! THREE---- NIGHTMARE WITH A FOOT ON THE ROPES! NO! Darko had it won, right there! It's over he says. He hooks both arms for the ZAMUNDA DRIVER, NIGHTMARE with a LOW BLOW! He got the arm free and nailed Darko, we've never really seen Nightmare use a move like that. And then Nightmare... gets two hands around Darko's throat! DREAMCATCHERRRRR! IT HITS! IT'S DONE! ONE! TWO! THREEE----

KICK OOOOOUUUUUT!

The crowd is going crazy. Nightmare is too, but for different reasons entirely. He can't believe it. Absolutely can't believe it. He's standing up arguing with the referee, wondering what the hell, that count was wrong. Nightmare looks... honestly, like he has no idea what to do. He looks upset, he's looking around, breathing heavily, face a mask of disbelief and confusion. "But...how? HOW?" And while this is going on, Prince Darko is somehow getting to his feet. He rushes Nightmare for THE EFFECT --- COUNTERED. Nightmare suddenly has a Fisherman's hook? WAIT A MINUTE! KI KRUSHER! KI KRUSHER! Sit-out fisherman's driver! Darko's body sags on impact as Nightmare pulls a leg in. The cover gets ONE! TWO! And THREE.

FRANK WARBURTON: Here is your winner... NIGHTMARE and TEAM KURTIS!

BILL HEWSON: I don't know if you can really say that Frank, a team needs to be on the same page to have the win. But Nightmare --- Nightmare has just pinned the Television Champion with a sick damn move.

JACK JONES: I can't believe Prince Darko got out of the Dreamcatcher, but it wasn't enough. I have to say I LIKE this new attitude Nightmare is sporting!

BILL HEWSON: Of course you would! Nightmare is a selfish, spoiled little brat who can't handle when the spotlight is on ANYBODY except for him! It's all about Nightmare, that's what we saw tonight! HE wanted the pin on Thomas Young! HE wanted to end the match! HE wanted to be the center of attention for his side and the entire match! And he did everything he could to ensure that!

JACK JONES: And it worked, so what the hell's wrong with that? Nothing, especially not when it gets you a big win on Pay-Per-View.

BILL HEWSON: ... Well folks, a tremendous effort from The Foundation here tonight, they were certainly unified, a great effort from TEAM Kurtis as well... but it is Nightmare who scores the match-ending pinfall and the victory for his "team" as it were. Team Kurtis and Nightmare getting some revenge on The Foundation, but I doubt Team Kurtis is happy with how they got there.

Nightmare is walking up the aisle to a shower of boos. But he doesn't care. Somebody wipe that smug grin off his damn face. But up next? A video package. Five-time NAPW Tag team champions NEW & IMPROVED D-X's war with R. Joseph Winchell III and MIDNIGHT COWBOYS. Tag Titles On The Line... next.

JACK JONES: So, it took a while, but I finally got my fist unstuck. And that's when I noticed my watch was missing.

BILL HEWSON: Disgusting.

JACK JONES: How so?

BILL HEWSON: You should never have tried to rob that vending machine!

JACK JONES: Two dollars for a bottle of water? I'd say they were robbing me!

BILL HEWSON: Well, I'll have to agree with you there. But it would have been faster to try and tip the machine and knock the pop out.

JACK JONES: People get crushed that way.

BILL HEWSON: My point exactly.

Awkward moment! Luckily "Bang Bang to the Rock and Roll" starts playing. And the Challengers to the Tag Titles are on their way to the ring.

FRANK WARBURTON: Ladies and gentlemen! This match is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the NAPW Tag Team Championship! And the titles CAN change on a count out or Disqualification. Also, should The New and Improved D-X lose, they will be forced to split up, forever!

The fans boo.

FRANK WARBURTON: Introducing first, the challengers! Making their way to the ring from Long Island, New York accompanied by PAPA Z... at a total combined weight of four-hundred and forty pounds, they are CLINT and STONE ZELLOR...MIDNIIIIIIIGHT COWBOOOOOOOOOYS!

Much venom for the challengers. Not so much for these guys.

"AS LOW AS YOU GO!"

And the crowd, she is a going, how you say? Nuts.

FRANK WARBURTON: AND NOW... They are the five time, and current, NAPW TAG TEAM CHAMPEEEEENS! They are the winners of the Hegstrand Memorial trophy... They were the undisputed Tag Team of the year in 2006! Accompanied by their manager, Bill Fleming... They are STYLIN' KYLE ROBERTS! BRUCE "THE BEAST" RICHARDS! AT A COMBINED WEIGHT OF FIVE-HUNDRED AND TWENTY-SEVEN POUNDS...

Wait for it.

FRANK WARBURTON: THE NEW! AND IMPROVED! DEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEXXXXXXXX!

Roberts and Richards are all business as they walk to the ring. They are confident. But they are wary, as the rules do not work in their favor. They get in the ring and go nose to nose with their opponents. Referee Dick Kiebiech is quick to separate the two teams, and hold the tag belts for all to see. He calls for the bell, and Roberts will start off against Clint Zellor. They lock up, and Roberts snaps an arm drag on Zellor. Zellor rolls to the ropes as Roberts tries to get an arm bar. But as soon as Clint grabs the bottom rope, Roberts releases.

BILL HEWSON: Roberts will take no chances tonight. Not when the slightest infraction could cost him his title!

JACK JONES: And his tag career, Hewson. Don't forget about that.

Zellor gets to his feet, and locks up again with Roberts. Roberts tries for a headlock, but Clint pushes him off. Roberts is pushed into the ropes, and bounces back into a clothesline from Zellor! Roberts goes down, Zellor covers, and Roberts kicks out at one. Zellor is quick to his feet. He races to the ropes, and catches a rising Roberts with a Yakuza kick! Roberts is back down, and Zellor covers again! One... Two.. Roberts took a little bit longer to kick out that time. Zellor tries to keep the advantage, but Roberts slips from Clint's grasp, and rolls to his own corner to tag in "The Beast". Richards storms in, but gets a chop from Clint. Richards chops Zellor back. Neither man flinches, despite the "Woo" from the crowd. Zellor thumbs Richards in the eye, then goes for an arm bar. He tries to drag "The Beast" over to his corner, but Richards fights back, and gets The Claw on Clint! The fans pop, thinking this will be over quick, but Stone Zellor rushes in to break the hold up. Roberts gets into the ring, but Richards cuts him off, not wanting to get disqualified.

JACK JONES: Looks like D-X will have to actually play by the rules tonight if they want to win.

BILL HEWSON: The Midnight Cowboys record isn't exactly clean when it comes to their victories.

JACK JONES: Were we talking about the Cowboys? No. We were talking about the rampant cheating of the New and Improved D-X!

Clint tags in his half brother Stone. He surprises Richards with a hard Pimp slap! Richards is momentarily stunned. But only for a moment. He grabs Stone by the throat, and choke tosses him into the corner. He runs in and slams the smaller Zellor boy with an elbow, then hits him with a cobra clutch bomb! A cover! One.. Two... Zellor kicks out! Richards keeps up the assault, as he applies his pump handle suplex throw, which sends Stone Zellor to the floor! Clint and Papa Z rush over to check on Stone. And Beast gets that look on his face. It's not a look you want him to have. If you're his opponent, that is. Beast gets up a head of steam and

PLANCHA!

Richards takes out all three Zellors! And the crowd is going nuts! Richards rolls back into the ring, avoiding any chance of a count out. Roberts smirks, then rushes over to toss Stone Zellor back into the ring. Richards goes for the pin! One... Two... BARELY kicks out! Richards drags Stone to the D-X corner, and Roberts is tagged back in. And A New and Improved Double Leg Drag sends Stone to the mat! Richards gets out of the ring before the five count, and Roberts is going for the Bear tamer! He's locked it in! Stone is in incredible pain! He looks ready to tap... and Clint Zellor grabs Roberts by the hair and tosses him to the outside!

BILL HEWSON: A huge gamble here by Clint Zellor! He's either hoping to get Stylin Kyle counted out or disqualified!

JACK JONES: Or maybe he just wants to weaken him so Stone can pin him fair and square.

BILL HEWSON: How can it be fair and square if Clint is blatantly cheating to weaken the opponent.

JACK JONES: The pin would still be legal.

Clint Zellor laying in with some huge chops, and Roberts is trying to get back in the ring before he gets counted out. He slips under the bottom rope, but is dragged back out by Clint, and Samoan dropped on the floor! Roberts writhes in pain, and Zellor throws him back in the ring, where Stone waits. He drags up Roberts, and hits a knee lift, then a clothesline! Roberts is nearly knocked out of his boots! Stone covers! One... two...

Richards in to break up the count. And he gets a STERN reminder from Kiebiech about the rules. And that he could lose his title if he tries that again. Richards nods, and goes back to his corner. Stone locks on a chicken wing, trying to make Roberts tap out! Roberts is already groggy, and now he's being tied in knots by his opponent! He tries to reach the ropes, but Stone pulls back, and Roberts is in serious danger now! He can't break out of it, but he can turn his body just enough that Stone is underneath him.. Kiebiech counts Stone's shoulders down! One... Two.. Stone breaks the hold immediately to avoid getting pinned, and yells at Kiebiech. Papa Z is complaining loudly as well, getting up on the ring apron to complain. And Stylin Kyle is using the distraction to crawl to his partner and tag in The Beast! The fans go nuts as Richards is raring' to go.

Too bad Kiebiech never saw the tag.

As a rain of boos comes from the fans, Stone drags Roberts over to the Cowboy side of the ring, and Clint is tagged back in. They whip Roberts to the ropes, and nail him with a Flapjack! Roberts crashes to the mat, and all the hopes for D-X go with him. The Cowboys drag Roberts back up, and they're setting up for The Staten Special! Stone to the middle rope, and he leaps at Roberts as he's held by Clint... but Roberts has just enough to get his head down, and Stone crashes to the mat! Clint lets go of Roberts and goes to check on his partner.. but Roberts grabs the the tights and schoolboys Clint! One! ... Two!... Clint kicks out, and Stone pounces on Roberts and starts to lay in the fists. The Beast tries to run in to help, but is cut off by Kiebiech, giving the Cowboys more time to double team. Richards face is beet red as he yells at Kiebiech to turn around. But by the time Kiebiech does, Stone has a perfectly legal head lock. Clint stands innocently on the ring apron. All this despite the fact that there was no tag.

BILL HEWSON: The Midnight Cowboys are going to steal this match, and it's a damn shame!

JACK JONES: Oh, come on Bill! A little change around here would be good for us all.

Stone has a smirk on his face, as he figures this is all but over. He drags Roberts to his knees, and yells out:

"IT'S SLAMMY TIME, BITCHES!"

He hooks the arms for the Double-arm DDT.. but Roberts back body drops Stone! Both men are down, and both men need to make tags! Roberts starts the long crawl to his corner. Stone is closer, and he tags in the big Clint. But Roberts gets a burst of energy just in time! HE DIVES

And slaps the outstretched hand of Bruce "The Beast" Richards.

Oh yes. You've been waiting for it.

HOT TAG

Richards lays into Clint with a series of stiff palm strikes. Stone tries to rush in, but gets a shot for his trouble. Clint swings wildly, misses, and gets a boot to the gut, followed by yet another pump handle suplex throw. (with 45% more Authority than last time!) Clint lands in a heap, and Richards goes to the top, and NAILS the diving head butt! A cover! One... Two... Stone Zellor breaks up the count! And Stylin Kyle is back in to even the odds! The match is breaking down here!

JACK JONES: Come on Kiebiech! Disqualify D-X!

BILL HEWSON: Um, both teams are in the ring.

JACK JONES: But it's D-X I want to lose.

BILL HEWSON: At least you're honest.

JACK JONES: I have my moments.

Kiebiech is trying to maintain control. he doesn't want this to end in a DQ. Not with the stakes this high. But he may have no choice. He tries to separate the two illegal men; Roberts and Stone. They are tied up in the corner. Kiebiech tries to get between them. And Stone gets the mule kick! But he knocks Roberts into Kiebiech! Luckily, Kiebiech is not knocked out. (it was only a minor bump) Roberts turns around...

Discus clothesline from Stone!

Roberts Ducks!

Kiebiech gets nailed!

Yeah. Now he's out.

And Papa Z is in. He has his loaded picket sign hidden under the ring. But there's no ref to stop him now. He tosses it into the ring. And a chair for good measure. Stone leans over to grab the chair.. but gets a Polarizer from Kyle! Stone's face crashes into the chair, taking him out for the moment. Papa Z gets on the ring apron to check on his boy, but Kyle lays the old man out AGAIN! And Kyle sees the downed ref. He sees the chair. And he sees Clint starting to get the upper hand on Bruce. And a smirk comes across Roberts' face. As the fans cheer him on, he grabs the chair...

JACK JONES: WAKE UP KIEBIECH!

He measures up Clint...

BILL HEWSON: HE'S RISKING IT ALL WITH THIS SHOT!

A swing! And a sick crack as chair meets skull! And the fans go silent. Clint Zellor looks up, a breathes a quick sigh of relief that he ducked.

Bruce Richards, who is now busted wide open, has a look of shock on his face as he tumbles backwards, falls through the ropes and hits the floor.

Kyle Roberts is stunned as well. You can really only hear one voice right now...

JACK JONES: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

Clint SPEARS the stunned Roberts as Bill Fleming races over to check on Richards. And Clint picks Kyle up. And nails the Twirl - E - Go Round! A sickening thud as Roberts hits the mat. Kiebiech is finally up, and he slowly crawls over to count the pin.

ONE!

BILL HEWSON: Not like this!

TWO!

JACK JONES: Yes like this!

THR- ROBERTS KICKS OUT!

The fans explode!

JACK JONES: NO!

And Roberts is literally fighting for his life now. No, the life of the New and Improved D-X! He lays in with punches on Clint! And a boot to the gut... MOOSE JAW DRIVER! Clint is down as Roberts covers! One... Two... CLINT KICKS OUT! The crowd is disappointed about that, but Roberts is not about to let up! He hits the ropes... LIONSAULT! Again with the cover! One... Two... CLINT GETS HIS FOOT ON THE ROPES! Roberts knows he'll have to pull out the big guns.. he drags Clint up...EMERALD FUSION TIME! He gets Clint set up!

BILL HEWSON: Kyle Roberts has to end this now!

JACK JONES: (grumbles) Somebody needs to end him..

The fans pop as Kyle gets ready to drop Clint!

But Stone has gotten back up. He's bleeding, but he sees his opportunity! He has managed to get to the top rope, and nails a missile dropkick to the face of Roberts, and he drops Clint! All three men are down! Roberts may have been knocked out by that shot! Clint covers! ONE! TWO! ROBERTS WITH HIS FOOT ON THE ROPES! The Cowboys are getting angry now. Clint drags Roberts to his feet! Roberts throws punches at the larger Zellor, but Clint gets him ready for a spinebuster! And Stone off the middle turnbuckle --- STATEN SPECIAL! Clint goes for the cover!

Bruce Richards is pulling himself to his feet!

Kiebiech dives in to make the pin count!

ONE.

Richards has a hold of the bottom rope and is climbing back in to make the save!

TWO.

BASEBALL SLIDE BY STONE!! HE KNOCKS RICHARDS TO THE FLOOR!

THREE.

............

And we have a stunned silence as Kiebiech calls for the bell.

FRANK WARBURTON: Here are your winners... AND NEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS! THE MIDNNNNNNNNNIGHT COOOOOOOOOWBOYS!

Clint helps up his brother at ringside. A weakened Papa Z has grabbed the tag team belts from referee Kiebiech, and presents them to his boys. The Midnight Cowboys retreat up the ramp. Laughing. Cocky. On top of the world. Because they did more than become champions.

They ended an era.

BILL HEWSON: We are witnessing history, ladies and gentlemen. Fair or not, The New & Improved D-X... can never tag again in wrestling. The Midnight Cowboys have ended the dynasty, and this crowd is stunned.

JACK JONES: History is one word for it! This night just keeps getting better and better!

The fans aren't sure how to react. On the outside, Bruce Richards is being supported by the guardrail and Bill Fleming, his face a bloody mask, easily .9 on the Muta scale. In the ring, Kyle Roberts has his hands on his hips, face... inscrutable. He glances briefly at his partner on the outside, but makes no move to come out and help him. Somebody in the crowd begins a "THANK YOU, THANK YOU" chant...

But that is taken from them almost immediately. Kyle Roberts looks at his partner and shakes his head. He slides through the ropes up the aisle and begins to walk away. The crowd is confused, murming, buzzing, upset.

There are many moments here. Bill Fleming looking after Roberts, yelling "KYLE!" The Beast is dazed, possibly concussed, certainly hurt from that sick chair shot. People in the crowd are crying. Girls mostly but at least one weepy emo boy.

The last shot we see before we cut away is the long, solo walk of Kyle Roberts to the dressing room.

The New and Improved D-X are no more.

Good a time as any for intermission.

Back to ringside... and Grade "A" Alberta Attitude has taken over the ring. "The Wild Rose" Wayne Wright has the mic.

WAYNE WRIGHT: You know, it's strange that the first Pay Per View of 2007 would happen without Moose Millar and Wayne Wright on the card. Two men whose names scream NAPW, and we're left out? And why? Maybe the higher ups thought we'd steal the show from Evan and Ravager.

Boo.

WAYNE WRIGHT: Maybe they thought we'd make people forget about The New and Improved D-X.

More Boos. Moose grabs the mic.

MOOSE MILLAR: Naw Wayne, I know what's the matter. The NAPW brass figured Vancouver couldn't handle Grade "A" Alberta Attitude!

The fans are very vocal now. But then:

AWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

BILL HEWSON: Again with that howl! We've been hearing it the last two weeks!

JACK JONES: I'll be under the desk if you need me.

BILL HEWSON: Problem with wolves, Jack?

JACK JONES: The Calgary Zoo. 1978. Long story.

Which we may never hear, because "Clap For the Wolfman" by The Guess Who takes over the speakers, and a well dressed (but rather hairy) man emerges from the ring entrance.

WOLFBOY: AWOOOOOOOOOOO!! Now let me get this straight babies! Did I hear you talk about attitude? Did I hear you talk about being show stealers? Near I can see, all you cats have stolen is two minutes of these people's lives!

A few cheers. But most are trying to figure out what they're seeing right now.

WOLFBOY: But I couldn't help but notice you boys whining about a lack of competition. Well, the Wolfboy is here to give ya what you need! Say hello to the new faces of the NAPW tag team division! Frankie! Mikey! The Famous Monsters Of Hollyweird!

Metric's "Monster Hospital" plays as two large, and I mean LARGE men emerge from the back. One dressed as Halloween's Michale Myers. And the other as the Classic Universal Frankenstein. (not exactly, though. Just enough that Universal won't sue). The two monsters lumber to the ring, where Wright and Moose stand, confused. But the Alberta boys only hesitate for a second. Moose throws a right at Mikey...

And Mikey ducks, and slaps on a MONSTER HEADLOCK!

JACK JONES: Wait a minute...

Wright lunges to help his partner, but is caught by Frankie, who applies a lethal POWER CHINLOCK! Wolfboy howls in approval from the outside!

JACK JONES: Oh come on!

BILL HEWSON: These monsters showing some power in the ring, making the most out of the most basic holds!

JACK JONES: Don't tell me you're falling for this?

BILL HEWSON: Falling for what?

Frankie lets go of the chinlock, then power clotheslines Wright out of the ring. Mikey drives Millar to the mat, then drives a series of knees to the top of big Moose's head. They drag Moose to his feet, and and double DDT him to the mat. Wright scales the top rope and jumps back into the ring, but is caught by Frankie, who power slams him down. And now Mikey is going to the top.. Frankie drags Wright to his feet, and positions him for ... a vertebreaker! Mikey with the double stomp to help drive Wright down, and "The Wild Rose" is folded up like a lawn chair!

And the fans seem to be appreciative. Jack Jones on the other hand..

JACK JONES: It's bad enough that Rex Caliber is pulling the exact same schtick, but why do the Celtic Assassins...

BILL HEWSON: The Assassins? They're suspended. Last I heard they're back in Edmonton.

JACK JONES: I can see red hair sticking out from under the Myers mask! They're not even trying!

BILL HEWSON: All I know is there's a new tag team ready to make a splash in the NAPW!

JACK JONES: What a load of...

Regardless of what Jack Attack Jones thinks, the crowd is quite enjoying the Famous Monsters. They're cheering and laughing with Mikey and Frankie as Wolfboy "AWOOOOS" one more time for good measure. Cut to a video package for BRUNO/KURT CASTLE to set up the next match.

FRANK WARBURTON: Ladies and gentlemen, this match is scheduled for one fall, and is for the NAPW Provincial Title! Now entering the ring, the challenger, from Chicago, Illinois, weighing in at two hundred and seventy-one pounds..."Big!" "Bad!" BRIIIIIIIIIIIAAAN BRUUUUUNOOOOOOO!

BILL HEWSON: As you can tell from the cheers coming from this appreciative crowd, Brian Bruno is a crowd favourite, even if he might be considered an underdog in this match.

JACK JONES: MIGHT be considered an underdog? His opponent is Untouchable! He's got no chance, Hewson, NO chance. I don't get it! Why are these people cheering this guy? Have they all been smoking that sweet Vancouver bud or something?

BILL HEWSON: What are you talking about, Jones?

JACK JONES: Uh...nothing, Hewson. Just call the match.

Brian Bruno stands in the middle of the ring, staring at the entrance to the venue with great intensity as "Step Up" fades to quiet. The place is still echoing with the cheers of the crowd, until...Scarface! The crowd starts booing even before the Provincial Champion walks through the entrance!

FRANK WARBURTON: And his opponent, hailing from Rochester, New York. Weighing in at two hundred and ninety-eight pounds, he is your NAPW Provincial Champion. Accompanied by Raul Havok..."The Devastator"! Kurt! CASTLE!

JACK JONES: And now they're booing the champion! I thought that this city would give us a classier crowd, but I see that Vancouver is full of yahoos just like Edmonton!

BILL HEWSON: Kurt Castle won the Provincial Championship just under a month ago in the semifinals of the Canada Cup, but in the end could only come up second place to Sick Billy Kryenik. If things had gone a little differently, the man you're looking at could have a NAPW title shot in the bank!

JACK JONES: Don't remind me, Hewson. Such wasted potential...oh, what could have been!

The Devastator marches around the ring, holding up his title belt for all the crowd to see, and "accidentally" bumps into Brian Bruno, who nearly tackles the big man from behind but reveree John Sharplin quickly gets in between the two men and defuses the situation.

JACK JONES: Did you see that! Blatant disrespect for the Provincial Champion! He should lose the match on a technicality!

BILL HEWSON: By the way, Jones, did you get your Untouchables shirt yet?

JACK JONES: Not yet! I keep asking Havok to put in a good word for me, but so far...hey, wait a second. Were you trying to insinuate that I'm an impartial announcer?

BILL HEWSON: I would never insinuate such a thing. I'd say it right to your face: you, sir, are impartial.

JACK JONES: I just appreciate talent, Hewson. Can I help it if all the best NAPW wrestlers happen to be in the Untouchables? The cream always rises to the top!

BILL HEWSON: So does scum.

JACK JONES: What?

BILL HEWSON: Nothing.

Kurt Castle hands his belt to the referee, who hands it over to Brian Bruno to inspect and then hands it to the timekeeper outside the ring. Castle and Bruno move to opposite sides of the ring: the champion cracking his neck and the challenger rolling his shoulders. The bell rings and the two men CHARGE each other, locking up in the center of the ring! It's a pure power struggle as each man strains to get the upper hand, neither one budging more than a few inches, until Castle gets the upper hand and locks in for a belly to belly suplex, and follows up with a quick knee drop to the head. Bruno gets to his hands and knees, and Castle moves in to make yet another hold, but Bruno grabs him around the waist and lifts him up into a HARD powerbomb! Castle is quickly on his feet again, and the two men tensely circle each other. The Devastator charges, but Brian Bruno steps out of the way; both men rebound off the ropes and Brian Bruno lays The Devastator out with a POWERFUL clothesline! Bruno's not done with his opponent, however, and he tries to lift Castle up for...yes! A gorilla press slam! NO! Castle struggles and Bruno can't hold him up; Castle drops down behind Bruno and plants him on the ground with a pump handle slam! Here's the cover, one, two, Bruno kicks out!

JACK JONES: So close! That was a slow count, Sharplin!

BILL HEWSON: You have to admire the sheer power of Brian Bruno, able to hold nearly three hundred pounds of Kurt Castle over his head.

JACK JONES: And he was very NEARLY able to complete a move! Wow, he's NEARLY adequate!

The two men again in the middle of the ring, and Kurt Castle pops Bruno in the mouth with a right hand! John Sharplin admonishes the Provincial Champion for the use of a closed fist, but Brian Bruno prefers his brand of punishment, and kicks him in the gut; Castle doubles over and Bruno whips him into the corner turnbuckle, following up with a BIG splash! Castle stumbles away from the turnbuckle, and Bruno grabs him from behind and gives him a belly to back suplex! Castle is dazed from the quick assault, and Bruno goes for the cover! One, two, Castle kicks out! Bruno doesn't let up, though, and pulls his opponent to his feet--LOW BLOW! Sharplin didn't see it, and Bruno drops to his knees as Castle grabs his head and lays in with one, two, three, four hard rights! Bruno topples over and Castle pulls him up and whips him into the ropes, following up with a hard tackle. He lifts his opponent up over his head for a Gorilla Press of his own, but Bruno scrambles out of it and Castle has to let him down. Bruno, quick on his feet, locks up with Castle--OVERHEAD BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX!

JACK JONES: OH NO!

BILL HEWSON: Castle could have very NEARLY ended the match if he had pulled off that Gorilla Press slam!

JACK JONES: Don't try and use your words against me, Hewson!

Brian Bruno back in control of this match, laying into the champion with a few hard chops until he falls back onto the ropes. Bruno whips him into the opposite ropes, and as Castle rebounds he meets up with a Big Bad Spinebuster! Bruno with the cover, one, two, thr-kickout! Kurt Castle kicking out at the last possible second, and the stress of this high-pressure match is getting to Brian Bruno. Cursing up a blue streak, he kicks Kurt Castle in the back of the head, but John Sharplin pulls him off and gives him a piece of his mind. Castle crawls to the ropes, pulling himself to his feet, and Bruno comes in with a rear headlock, but Castle powers out of it and flips Bruno over his head, following it up with a falling elbow to the chest. Castle lifts Bruno back up and gets in two hard chops before Bruno stumbles to his knees, and then he whips him into the near turnbuckle. Castle walks over to his opponent, slowly, and lifts him up to the top turnbuckle...DDT! FROM THE TOP ROPE! And both men are breathing heavily after that kind of impact! Castle rolls over and gets an arm over Bruno's chest. One, two, threeeeee--foot on the ropes! Brian Bruno SOMEHOW gets his foot on the ropes, and stops the three count! And now it's Castle's turn to spit and swear as he can't BELIEVE he didn't take the match just then!

BILL HEWSON: These two men both have short fuses, and I don't think there's much wick left for either of 'em.

Brian Bruno slowly getting to his feet, and Castle lays in with a double axe handle! Bruno stumbles back but doesn't fall down; another axe handle from Castle, and another, but Bruno stays up! A fourth axe handle from Castle--Bruno locks both his hands around Castle's back! Castle starts to yell out in pain as Bruno squeezes the life out of him with the Baby Back Rack! Castle, gritting his teeth, pounds on Bruno's shoulders; Bruno is obviously hurt but isn't letting go! Castle is gasping for breath, lifting his hands above his head, trying to maximize the amount of air going into his lungs, and he BOXES BRUNO'S EARS! Bruno is stunned but doesn't let go, and Castle DOES IT AGAIN! Bruno lets go and grips his head in his hands, and Castle follows it up with an INVERTED NECKBREAKER! Bruno is flat out on the mat, and there might as well be cute animated birds floating around his head; Castle lays on the mat as well, trying to gasp in a few mouthfuls of air. John Sharplin starts his count, one, two, three, four, five, six--Kurt Castle gets to his knees and crawls over to pin Brian Bruno. One, two, three--HAND ON THE ROPES! Brian Bruno AGAIN gets a hold of the ropes, and denies the Provincial champion victory! Castle is FURIOUS, and begins choking Brian Bruno as he lies on the ground! Sharplin only gets to four, however, as Havok screams at Castle to let go FOR THE LOVE OF GOD and it somehow registers behind the bloodlust. Castle retires to his corner, where Sharplin gives him a HARSH lecture about how he runs his wrestling ring. Bruno is crouched in the corner, rubbing his neck and staring daggers at Castle, who shrugs off Sharplin's rant and shoves him aside. Bruno runs at Castle and TACKLES HIM RIGHT INTO THE TURNBUCKLE, following it up with a flurry of fists! He gets to ten and Sharplin pulls him off, but Castle's in no shape to retaliate, and Bruno grapples up with him in the middle of the ring; SIT-OUT PILEDRIVER! Bruno with the cover!

ONE!

TWO

THREE--CASTLE KICKS OUT!

BILL HEWSON: Brian Bruno would be TEARING HIS HAIR OUT right now if he had any hair left!

JACK JOHNSON: He could almost taste the Provincial Championship, but that's a dish that's reserved for The Devastator!

Brian Bruno lifts The Devastator up and recieves an eyeful of spit for his trouble! Castle, still a little woozy, gives Bruno a grin, who goes up for a chop--blocked by Castle! Maybe he wasn't as dizzy as he let on! Castle fires right back, but is blocked by Bruno! Bruno, blocked! Castle, BLOCKED! Bruno--connects! And the fists are flying furiously back and forth right now! Castle, Bruno, Castle, Bruno, Castle, Bruno, Bruno, BRUNO! Castle takes one step backwards, and that's all the opening Bruno needs to move in for another belly-to-belly suplex, but he CAN'T LIFT CASTLE! He tries again, but he's just too worn out! He gives it one more shot, and Castle lifts his knee RIGHT INTO THE LITTLE BAD BRIANS! Castle has turned it around on him! Belly-to-belly -- NO! TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER! Castle has just delivered one half of Total Devastation! And here's the cover!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

JACK JONES: Ring the bell!

FRANK WARBURTON: The winner! And STILL Provincial Champion! "The Devastator" KURT CAAAAAAAASTLE!

Kurt Castle rolls out of the ring and Raul Havok supports his client as best he can as the crowd shows their disapproval at the outcome of the match. John Sharplin leans over to see if Brian Bruno is all right, and the boos turn to cheers as Bruno gets to his feet without any assistance.

BILL HEWSON: And the fans are showing their appreciation to Brian Bruno after a hard-fought match.

JACK JONES: He fought hard all right, but he just didn't have what it takes to dethrone Castle!

BILL HEWSON: Were you trying to make a pun there?

JACK JONES: I have never made a pun in my life and you know it! Now, if we're done with your English lesson, let's talk more about Kurt Castle! He truly is Untouchable!

BILL HEWSON: That remains to be seen. Kurt Castle however retains the Provincial Title after a hard-hitting match-up with that man there, Brian Bruno. You know gold will come his way sooner than later here in New Alberta Pro... just not tonight. Let's go backstage where Josh Reynolds is standing by with SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL.

And then indeed, we do "go" "backstage." Josh Reynolds is standing next to Simply Beautiful, wearing an "ITALLIAN STALLION" t-shirt and looking confident.

JOSH REYNOLDS: I am standing here with a man who has over the past several months earned a reputation as being one of NAPW's fan-favorites. On his way up the card, tonight he will team with Patrick Bickle to challenge "The Lemondrop Kid" Lloyd Rees and "The Chairman of NAPW" David Banks. SB, first question, do you think you can depend on your partner?

SB looks at Reynolds over his shades.

SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL: Do I think I can depend on my partner? Do I THINK... I can depend on my PARTNER? You mean Patrick Bickle?

JOSH REYNOLDS: Well of course I mean ---

SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL: You know what Reynolds? Just give me the mic, I'll do this myself. You're cramping my style.

SB grabs the mic and shoves Reynolds out of the scene. He looks straight into the camera, drawing a pop from the crowd watching on the NAPW screen. SB takes off his sunglasses, looking serious.

SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL: You know all month long people have been talking about how Patrick Bickle seems to have lost a step. Everybody gave up on Bickle, everybody except me. But I'll tell you what. I talked to Bickle earlier this afternoon and he told me tonight... Lloyd Rees! David "Chump" Banks! Here's the deal. The two of you bring all the chairs and cod to the ring you damn well want! You got PATTY BICKLE... you got SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL! And you got comin' to you a New York style ass-kicking like you've never experienced! Because I am NOT just the best, I am not JUST the coolest... I AM.

SB cocks an eye at the camera and flashes a grin.

SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL: Simply. Beautiful. Let's do this.

FRANK WARBURTON: The following contest is a tag team match, and it is schedueled for one-fall, introducing first...

Fighting 59 ignites a short fuse with the crowd as they soon errupt into a mass of boos and obscenties. Lloyd Rees waltz out onto center stage, waving a Republic of Newfoundland flag, with Ol' Salty just behind the Lemondrop Kid.

FRANK WARBURTON: Hailing from Bell Island, Newfoundland, at a weight of two-hundred and forty-seven pounds, he is "The Lemondrop Kid" Lloyd Rees!

The boos persist as he continues to the ring. Once in he steps up on a turnbuckle to wave the Newfoundland flag some more. As his music fades, it is replaced with the blaring sounds of "Never Gonna Get It." The Lemondrop Kid stops waving his flag and grows a huge grin.

FRANK WARBURTON: And his partner, haling from Greensboro, North Carolina at a weight of two-hundred and twenty-three pounds, he is the Chairman of NAPW, David Banks!

Banks lives up to his name as he makes his way out with a steel chair in his left hand. The Greensboro native leaves his steel chair with Ol' Salty, and slides into the ring to bump fists with Rees. Banks cracks his neck from side to side as Rees does a little in place jog to prepare. Stone Cold Crazy plays over the PA system as Rees and Banks get ready for a fight.

FRANK WARBURTON: And their opponents, introducing first, making way from Staten Island, New York, at a weight of two-hundred and thirty-five pounds, Simply Beautiful!

Simply Beautiful struts out slowly to a mass of cheers and stops at the bottom of the ramp as his oppenents get ready to pounce on the first thing that enters the ring. Simply Beautiful is too smart for that, he simply smiles and clutches his hands. Ibi Dreams of Pavement plays...

FRANK WARBURTON: His partner, from New York, New York, at a weight of one-hundred and seventy-five pounds, Patrick Bickle!

Simply Beautiful keeps his eyes locked on his opponents, but his partner isn't behind him. He remains stationary for half a minute when his curiosity draws and he turns to see no one coming from the entrance way.

BILL HEWSON: Where's Patrick Bickle?

JACK JONES: I don't know, but if he doesn't show up, heh, well this is going to be real fun to watch.

Simply Beautiful looks to the entrance way--then to his opponents--the entrance way--his opponents--the entrance way--his opponents. Banks and Rees begin to mock him after about a minute of theme music. Simply Beautiful shrugs his shoulders and dives into the ring, imediately throwing lefts and rights at both opponents.

BILL HEWSON: There's the bell, but there's no Bickle!

JACK JONES: I always say, less Bickle, more better.

The fans cheer as Simply Beautiful takes it to both of them, alternating punches to the face. He cocks back and NAILS Rees in the face, knocking him down to the mat--he winds back and another HUGE shot, this time to Banks. Rees and Banks both roll out of the ring, obviously shocked that Simply Beautiful came at them so hard.

BILL HEWSON: I think Rees and Banks need to evaluate just who they're going up against, Bickle may not be present, but Simply Beautiful is no push over!

JACK JONES: Oh whatever, he's maybe a little bit better than Wayne Wright on a good day, he just suprised them, that's all.

BILL HEWSON: Suprised them? They were waiting to jump on him as soon as he got in the ring.

Both Banks and Rees attempt to get back in the ring, but the referee ensures only one of them enter, and the other is left on the apron. Rees decides to take a crack at Simply Beautiful and jumps in the ring, immediately going for a clothesline, but Simply Beautiful ducks it and Rees goes into the ropes. Coming back Simply Beautiful hits him with a clothesline of his own. Simply Beautiful raises his hands in the air, gaining the crowds approval as Rees looks up at him from below, pissed. Simply Beautiful lets Rees get to his feet, and Rees calls for a lockup. The two lock in and begin testing each others strength, Simply Beautiful powers Rees down to one knee, but Rees gets back up and throws a mean knee to the gut. Rees grabs the arm of Simply Beautiful quickly puts him into a chicken wing hold, and backs up to his corner to tag in David Banks, still holding on to the bent arm of Beautiful.

Banks comes in and kicks Simply Beautiful in the side of the ribs, while Rees simutaneously lets go. Rees gives Beautiful a mean chop to the chest (WOOO) followed up by another even harder chop(WOOO). He hits the third and Simply Beautiful fires back with a chop of his own(WOO). Banks throws a left hook in the face of Beautiful, and Simply Beautiful fires back with his own. The two get caught up into a frenzy of exchanging blows when Beautiful blocks a shot from Banks, hits another punch which sends Banks reeling. Simply Beautiful grabs the arm of Banks and whips him into the ropes, Banks comes back and hits a nasty clothesline. Banks goes off the ropes again and hits an elbow drop on the fallen Beautiful one. He goes for a quick pin but not even a one count, but before Beautiful can get up, Banks locks in a front facelock. He squeezes hard then spins around, releasing the hold but grabbing Simply Beautiful's face and arm.

BILL HEWSON: Is he going for the Charasmatic Crossface already?

Banks tries, but Beautiful won't let him lock his arm in, and wriggles free from danger. Both men propell to their feet quickly, and Banks goes for a short armed clothesline, but Beautiful ducks and hits a mean swinging neckbreaker! Simply Beautiful up and throws a quick right at Rees on the apron. The fans cheer louder and Ol' Salty has a verbal conniption.

BILL HEWSON: Simply Beautiful is showing these guys he means business tonight!

JACK JONES: Just like your mom, but only with sex and money.

BILL HEWSON: My mother was a saint!

JACK JONES: "Was," Hewson.

BILL HEWSON: She's no longer with us!

JACK JONES: Well, then I... huh.

Simply Beautiful eats up the crowd's approval, as Banks gets to his feet quicker than Simply Beautiful anticipated, and hits a huge belly-to-belly suplex. The crowd drops to silent until Banks yells out, "NOT SO GREAT NOW, IS HE?" Which of course is barraged with boos.

BILL HEWSON: This is a handicap match, I mean, how is this fair? But Simply Beautiful won't say die! Bickle or no Bickle, he's fighting on!

Rees back up on the apron and furious, demanding Banks to tag him in. With no fuss, Banks tags in the Lemondrop Kid, who comes in stomping the dirt out of Simply Beautiful. Rees picks up Beautiful and throws him outside the ring. Rees distracts the referee long enough for the sharks to smell the blood in the water, Banks jumps down from the apron, as he and Ol' Salty lay the boots into him. They sit Simply Beautiful up, and Ol' Salty uses the flag stick accross his throat to choke the life out of him, while Banks continues his assault. The two finally decide that their assault was sufficient, and slide Simply Beautiful inside the ring. Rees is quick to cover- one, two, not quite. Rees, slightly frustrated, shouts some words at the referee, then picks Beautiful up and turns his wary opponent around to his DDT FROM THE GREEN!

One...

Two...

No, Simply Beautiful still has some fight in him! This time Rees is infuriated with the referee, going as far as getting in the referee's face. The Lemondrop Kid shakes off his anger and goes to pick Beautiful back up, but wo! Simply Beautiful with a burst of energy, grabs Rees' arm, and pulls him down into the Painkiller! His variation of a fujiwara armbar!

Shocked and in pain, the Lemondrop Kid lets out moans of agony. This is where partners come in handy. David Banks runs in and delivers a swift boot to the face of Simply Beautiful. The referee begins the five count for Banks to get out of the ring, and as he's distracted, Ol' Salty slides David's steel chair in the ring. Simply Beautiful takes some time to get to his feet, as Rees rolls over to the chair, trying to hide it from unwanting eyes. Ol' Salty jumps on the ring apron, telling the referee to learn how to do his job. As the referee attempts to get Ol' Salty from the apron, Rees gets to his feet with the chair, just as Simply Beautiful is up on one knee, trying to pull himself with the ropes the rest of the way. Rees comes at Simply Beautiful with the chair cocked back, Simply Beautiful on his feet, Rees swings, Simply Beautiful ducks and Rees misses but Beautiful grabs Rees and hits the IMPACT DDT! The Lemondrop Kid is down, and the chair bounces to the corner of the ring. Banks runs in, SEXY KICK to the face! Ol' Salty now legitimately angry, won't leave the ring apron. With the referee distracted, Simply Beautiful gets up on his hands and knees and crawls over to Rees for the cover... but there's no ref!

BILL HEWSON: Come ON!

The crowd does a ghost count of what would be if the referee's attention wasn't diverted. Beautiful gets up when he sees why the referee isn't counting, and gives Ol' Salty a SEXY KICK for his troubles! Ol' Salty goes down hard, and isn't moving on the outside. Rees rolls out of the ring grabbing his head, looking like that DDT really messed up his day. Simply Beautiful reaches on the outside to grab the Lemondrop Kid by the hair, but Rees NAILS Simply Beautiful with a chair shot right on top of the head!

BILL HEWSON: WHERE THE HELL DID THAT CHAIR COME FROM?

JACK JONES: Not only is the Lemondrop Kid one of the greatest professional wrestlers of all time, but he's aparently a skilled magician!

BILL HEWSON: The referee didn't even see it, he was trying to get Banks up and out of the ring! This is highway robbery!

JACK JONES: No, I call it genius.

Banks rolls out of the ring as Rees jumps back in and goes for the cover.

JACK JONES: That's all she wrote!

ONE...

TWO...

TH-NO! SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL KICKED OUT! HE KICKED OUT! Rees can't believe it, Banks with a bloody mouth from the Sexy Kick can't believe it! Rees adamantly shouts that the referee was wrong, and the cheers for BEAU-TI-FUL explode throughout the crowd. Rees shouts feriociously, as Banks reaches in the ring to be tagged in. The Lemondrop Kid, frustrated and flustered, tags in the Chairman, who comes in and spit a gob a blood on the face of Simply Beautiful. Rees doesn't even get on the apron, instead he retrieves his weapon of miniscule destruction, the chair that he used on Simply Beautiful moments ago, and gets back in the ring. He yells for Banks to pick him up, Banks hoists Beautiful up and Rees cocks back. The Lemondrop Kid goes to swing the chair, but no! The referee is latched to the other end of it, he won't let him use the chair. Rees argues but eventually lets go, and as the referee disposes of the chair, he grabs the chair that he was originally going to use on Beautiful that is still in the ring. He cocks back, but Beautiful throws his foot up between Banks' legs and hits him in the naughty zone, and with another astonishing boost of energy, he lunges at Rees. The Lemondrop Kid sidesteps him and plans the head of the chair right into Beautiful's sternum, and just as the referee turns around, Rees is already out of the ring. Banks grabbing his crotch, seizes the oppritunity and latches Simply Beautiful into the Charismatic Crossface!

JACK JONES: This is it! No one gets out of this!

BILL HEWSON: Simply Beautiful is in a rough spot right now, and he's already been through so much!

Beautiful can't scream in pain, but the muffled moans from David's hands, and his watery eyes are a good indication that this hold hurts, bad. He reaches for the ropes, only inches away, but in a wrestling ring that could seem like miles. The fans back their man as they chant "BEAU-TI-FUL, BEAU-TI-FUL". He tries to nudge himself forward, but gains little ground. Banks has a sadistic grin on his face as he pulls back on the hold as hard as he can.

JACK JONES: He's only moments away, I'm suprised he lasted this long.

His hand shaking, and his face beat red, Simply Beautiful pushes, and pushes and pushes some more. He's so damn close.

BILL HEWSON: I think I just saw his finger tips touch the rope!

JACK JONES: No way!

His fingers grace the ropes and David Banks pulls back harder, but Simply Beautiful struggles on regaurdless. The chants get louder, the fans are in a frenzy. He's so close, he's practically there! His fingers are on the ropes! Banks has to break the hold... NO! Rees just entered and kicked Beautiful's hand away! Now with the leverage back, Banks scoots him back into the middle of the ring as Rees returns to the apron. SB holds on that much longer... but...

The fans boo like crazy as Simply Beautiful has no choice but to tap.

FRANK WARBURTON: The winners of this match by submission, the team of David Banks and Lloyd Rees!

The bell sounds but Banks doesn't let go. Rees reenters the ring and starts laying the boots to the man who gave them both such a terrific fight. The Lemondrop kid gets down on his hands and knees, screaming into the face of a helpless Simply Beautiful as Banks keeps the pressure on the crossface.

BILL HEWSON: This is disgraceful! Finally they've got some officals to separate this mess!

JACK JONES: Well that's what Simply Beautiful gets for running in like an (BLEEP), when he didn't have a partner.

BILL HEWSON: Patrick Bickle has left his partner to the vultures! What the hell --- where IS he? Somebody get the hell out here!

The duo of Rees and Banks leave the ring before the officials and trainers and come in, and leave the ring to collect their items and Ol' Salty. Simply Beautiful looks hurt, bad.

They get him to his feet and the crowd applauds him for his aptitude, but Simply Beautiful seems more angry than anything. As the trainers try to check him he shoves them away and leaves the ring.

BILL HEWSON: What a sad day for Simply Beautiful.

JACK JONES: Maybe next time he should try to find someone more reliable than that washed up heap of garbage, Patrick Bickle.

BILL HEWSON: Well, whatever the reasons Bickle has for not showing up tonight, he really left Simply Beautiful in the worst situation when Simply Beautiful needed him the most. When we come back ladies and gentlemen, it will be Falls Count Anywhere... this crowd giving Simply Beautiful a standing ovation. I don't even know what to say.

Fade out on SB's angry face as he walks through the curtain, into a video package for Doomriders/Untouchables.

BILL HEWSON: Ladies and gentlemen, up next is a match that will not be for the feint of heart. The Untouchables, The Doomriders. Falls Count ANYWHERE in Western Canada, Jack Jones. Need I say more?

JACK JONES: No, just lock your doors and hope these crazy bastards don't come crashing through your front window. If you thought you knew what a street fight was - well, your opinion is about to change, trust me.

BILL HEWSON: It was a little over a year ago that the Doomriders defeated the Delivery Men in what has to be considered one of the most brutal matches in New Alberta Pro Wrestling history, but something tells me this match can top even that.

JACK JONES: Right, because this time those drunken psychopaths are gonna get their asses kicked by my FAVORITE stable ever. I haven't been this excited since Lloyd Rees beat D! at Hostile Hangover, but my doctor has prescribed me with something to make sure I don't ever do what I did in celebration of that victory again.

BILL HEWSON: And it's a damn good thing he did! I literally threw up when you told me that story!

JACK JONES: Well, it's like they say Hewson. When you party, naked stuff happens.

BILL HEWSON: Right. At any rate

FRANK WARBURTON: Ladies and Gentlemen, it is now time for the FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE TAG TEAM MATCH!

The crowd goes BONKERS in anticipation for what promises to be a bloodbath. "Untouchables" by Scarface, the theme song of the Untouchables, pipes into the arena and the fans cheer's convert to some of the most vicious boos you've ever heard in your life. Chris Casino steps out first, Pure Vegas title strapped over his shoulder, cocky as ever. What a dick. From behind him steps the MONSTER Kenny Krenshov, his manager Eli Potts by his side. Raul Havok follows, clapping for his men. Several fans reach out and try to touch Casino as they walk to the ring, but he slaps their hands away and laughs. "You think I want to catch whatever you filthy losers picked up in some soup kitchen? Bah!". Once in the ring, they take their corner. Kenny looks about as angry as a Krenshov.

JACK JONES: Look at these men, Hewson. These are the kind of people you wish you could be associated with! Men with class, style, talent, success -

BILL HEWSON: Who lie, cheat, and have no respect for wrestling or anyone involved in it.

JACK JONES: SLANDERER! PROPAGANDA ARTIST! BLASPHEMER!

BILL HEWSON: Hypertension.

JACK JONES: Thanks for reminding me

And then...

Jaws of the Lion.

And the crowd EXPLODES! A Road Warrior-like pop as The Doomriders, Billy Kryenik and Tommy Deathrow, step out from behind the curtain. Barbed Wire spools wrapped around their necks, each with a chair. And across their backs they're sharing the weight of a table. Beside them are some crew members, wheeling out a container filled with all sorts of instruments of destruction. Good lord, it's time for war.

FRANK WARBURTON: Introducing first - (BLEEP)!

No, (BLEEP) isn't wrestling. That was the sound of Frank getting the hell out of the way of The Doomies as they stormed the ring and started swinging chairs at everyone in sight! The Untouchables bail out and Casino and Krenshov grab chairs of their own. Deathrow and Kryenik take the barbed wire off and are beckoning them to get back into the ring, but Casino looks a bit reserved. Krenshov? He storms right the hell in!

BILL HEWSON: My God, look at all the weapons!

JACK JONES: PLUNDAH!

Krenshov swings at Deathrow, who blocks with his own chair. CLANG! Deathrow swings back, but his strike is parried too, by Kenny this time! And then Kryenik slams his chair right into Kenny's back, but he just TAKES it, like it was a mosquito bite. Casino hops in now, and throws his chair at Kryenik, hitting him in the shoulder and grazing the side of his head. As Billy turns, he eats a chair dropkick to the face from Casino as Kenny choke tosses Deathrow into the corner. Kenny picks up the table, the same one carried to the ring by the Doomriders, and avalanches Deathrow with it, nearly squashing him with the impact. Deathrow falls out of the ring, and Krenshov wastes no time in getting right after him. Back in the ring, Casino picks Kryenik up and pounds him in the head with some hard right hands, but Billy fights back and hits a low blow! No rules, just right! Casino drops to his knees, clutching his groin in pain. And that's all the time Billy needs to go and get...barbie. As in BARBED WIRE! He picks it up, and holds it high as the fans go nuts. He wraps it around his OWN fist, and blood starts to come out from his knuckles, tearing the flesh away - Casino is still helpless here, my GOD. Krenshov just came back in and TATOOED Kryenik with a trash can! Doomrider Bill goes down, and Kenny hits him again, connecting with his shoulder, sending Kryenik into a frenzy of pain. Casino is up by now, and he's right in Kryenik's face, cursing his very name. He reaches out and slaps the taste out of his mouth, but Billy punches him right in the kisser for it! Krenshov rears back to swing again, but Tommy rips the can out of his hands and dumps it over his head! Kenny's stumbling around blindly, he can't see a thing! Casino goes to help, but he gets a KISS OF BABYLON right to the chin that knocks him out of the ring and into the arms of Havok and Potts, who all take quite a tumble. Deathrow and Bill smile. The crowd comes to their feet as they pick up chairs and knock them together like a twisted kind of "toast". BANG! CHAIRSHOT TO THE TRASH CAN from Deathrow! BANG! THERE'S ONE FROM KRYENIK, but Krenshov is still standing! The Doomriders shrug and it's a con-chair-toe that finally brings the monster down. He falls, and Deathrow pulls off the can. Kenny shoots up and grabs him by the throat, and drags him down to the mat! Kryenik sees Casino getting up, and leaps over the top rope on top of him - side-step from the Grand Slammer, Kryenik crashes and burns right into the guardrail! Krenshov tosses Deathrow to the outside, and starts to wail away on him. He reaches back in the ring and picks up the barbed wire, and unravels the spool a little bit; wrapping it around a two by four he pulls out of the weapon bin. Deathrow charges, trying to get the weapon out of his hands but Kenny just pushes him off with one hand. He winds up and drives the barbed-wire two by four right into Tommy's head!

BILL HEWSON: HE'S BUSTED OPEN! DID YOU SEE THAT, JACK ATTACK?

JACK JONES: I DID, AND GOD, DID I LOVE IT!

Casino and Kryenik have made it all the way up the aisle by now, battling back and forth, and they've found yet another stash of weapons. Kryenik forcefully slams Casino into the guardrail and reaches in to find a glass bottle. The crowd pops huge, and Billy holds it up for all of them to see. All the while, Krenshov and a crimson-masked Deathrow are brawling up the aisle, headed right towards them. Krenshov press slams Tommy over the guard rail, and he lands chest first - and then Kenny notices that Kryenik's about to hit Casino with the bottle! He picks Deathrow up, over his shoulder, and starts to move towards them he's only a few feet away when Kryenik starts the downward swing! He THROWS Deathrow at Kryenik - but TOO LATE! The glass shatters over Casino's head, busting him open something awful! But Deathrow does indeed crash right into his fellow Doomrider, and they tumble to the cold, hard concrete. Irate, Kenny grabs Kryenik by the back of the neck and yanks him to his feet, and tosses him off the stage! He crashes into several boxes that harshly break his fall some eight feel below. Krenshov looks completely insane, and he dives off the stage on top of Kryenik with an elbow drop!

BILL HEWSON: OH MY GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADD!

The crowd is in a frenzy, they still hate Krenshov but that was insane! Down in the pit, Krenshov is stirring, but he may have injured himself in the fall. Potts and Havok are checking on Casino, who's bleeding heavily above his right eye - it's a deep, angry cut and blood is just pouring out. As Havok and Eli are trying to clean it up, Deathrow gets to his feet - unbeknownst to them - and his eyes light up as he sees his chance to let em' have it. The crowd is still going nuts from the stage dive, but it's getting even louder now! Tommy reaches into the bin and pulls out a Singapore cane! The rood might just get blown off here in Vancouver! Potts finally turns around to see what the hell is going on - CRACK! Eli falls flat on his back, and blood trickles down from his forehead. Havok sees him fall, and turns around to see Tommy stalking him. He begs off, headed back up the aisle, and tries pleading, but nothing is going to save him now right in the middle of the ramp. CRACK! CRACK! CRACK! Tommy destroys the cane over Raul Havok's head, and busts him wide open! The crowd is chanting "DEATH-ROW, DEATH-ROW" as Havok crumples to a heap. Tommy turns around and Casino jumps up and wraps a baking sheet around his head. Tommy stumbles, and Casino laces him one more time to put him down. He covers him, this could be it! ONE...TWO...

BILL HEWSON: KICKOUT!

JACK JONES: IT'S THOSE DAMN DOOMRIDERS!

Casino is in disbelief, and starts to drag Deathrow over, underneath the balcony area, where he finds - ten fully set-up tables, stacked in five rows of two. He smiles and starts to pound away on Deathrow, who fires back as the screen splits to a double feature of Krenshov pulling himself out of the wreckage beneath the stage - but there's no Billy Kryenik. The camera cuts to a full-screen shot of Krenshov, roaring Kryenik's name. Where the hell did Billy go? And then from out of nowhere, he comes sprinting from the entrance, wrapped in barbed wire and holding a FLAMING (BLEEP)ING CHAIR!

BILL HEWSON: WHAT ON EARTH?

KRYENIK TAKES FLIGHT, RAISING THE FIRE CHAIR HIGH OVER HIS HEAD! HE SLAMS IT DOWN ON KRENSHOV'S HEAD, A FLYING-FLAMING CHAIR SHOT! A HUGE FLAME SHOOTS INTO THE AIR, AND KENNY KRENSHOV VERY WELL MAY BE DEAD!

BILL HEWSON AND JACK JONES: OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!

BILL HEWSON: WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED HERE?

JACK JONES: Billy Kryenik is a God damn maniac!

The crowd has gone insane; people are chanting "HOLY (BLEEP)" loud enough to be heard back in Edmonton! Casino runs over, he was too late to save Krenshov. The camera crew finally gets a shot of the scene bellow the stage, and it's not a pretty sight. Pools of blood from both the head of Kenny Krenshov and the BODY of Sick Billy Kryenik. The still burning chair, lying yards away, that quickly gets put out and discarded by NAPW security so as not to be used again. And the barbed wire wrapped body of Kryenik lying just inches away from Krenshov. He reaches an arm over, by instinct, and referee Morgan Smythe starts to count from on top of the stage. With no other choice, Casino kicks the Smythe in the FACE, that bastard! He laughs as the crowd calls for his blood. "What are you gonna do about it, you dirty Canadi-OWWW! It's Deathrow, blood pouring down his face, with an ungodly chair shot to the back of Casino's head. He covers - but there's no referee! The crowd counts all the way to SIX, and starts to boo to high hell until John Sharplin charges out and counts the fall! ONE....TWOOOO....NO! Casino was finally able to recover and kick out, with a lot of help! Somehow, Krenshov is up again, and he finally makes it back to the entrance, but he's bleeding like a stuck pig. Deathrow, just as bloodied, stares him down. They look at each other, and the crowd can feel the hate between them, hell, you could probably feel it from outer space! Krenshov makes a throat slash gesture, and smiles a sick, twisted smile. Deathrow just grills him and beckons him to "Come and get it, big man!" The crowd erupts as they stand toe to toe, hitting each other with everything they have left! Krenshov hits a particularly devastating overhand right, and knocks Deathrow to the ground, seemingly out cold. Krenshov picks him up and carries him back to the area with all the tables set up - oh God, no! He places Deathrow in between two of the tables, and starts to climb the steps leading to the balcony? NO WAY, he can't be planning to do what I think he's doing! Billy Kryenik with a forearm to Krenshov's face, nearly takes the big man down! But he fires back and knocks Billy into a wall. Casino is back up, his face a bloody mess that has gotten into his hair. He stumbles over to Kryenik, and starts putting the boots to him along with Kryenik, who's now bleeding from the forehead to go along with the open wounds on his body that were ripped into him from the barbed wire. Kryenik starts to choke him as Casino climbs the steps and gets up on top of the balcony. He's twenty-five feet above the higher row of tables, and about eight more from the floor! But Deathrow rolls out from in between the tables and crawls away! Casino goes to jump, but notices that Deathrow isn't there; he's swinging a weapon passed to him by a fan - a skillet! WHOOSH! Kenny moved out of the way! CLANG! It bounces off the wall and flies out of his hand! Kenny wipes him out with a clothesline, and starts dragging Kryenik up the stairs! Casino laughs like a madman, and the crowd is starting to get very, very unsettled! Krenshov lays "Ill-Bill" down in front of Casino as some sort of sick sacrifice.

BILL HEWSON: My God, I don't like this, not one bit! Not on the damn balcony, you could kill him like that!

JACK JONES: GOOD! THAT'S WHAT WE WANT, HEWSON! KILL THAT SON OF A BITCH! DO IT!

BILL HEWSON: You're sick, Jack Attack. You've completely lost your mind - my God!

Casino has Kryenik in powerbomb position, and Kenny is standing beside him, all smiles. Casino goes for the lift, but Kryenik slips, falling limp to his knees. Casino just shrugs and tried to lift again, to send him down below to the tables - TWENTY-FIVE FEET below - but Kryenik slips out again. He's become dead weight, seemingly. Casino looks pissed off and just lets go of him, and kicks him in the ribs a few times for good measure. DING! Ball shot, from Billy with love to Chris Casino! Casino goes down in agony, and Krenshov storms over and picks Kryenik up - and Billy rakes his eyes, he's fighting for his life up there! The crowd is on their feet going absolutely BANANA, people are trying to break through the barriers to see this but security and Vancouver police are doing a remarkable job holding them back. Right hand from Kryenik! Right hand from Krenshov, Kryenik teeters, but he fires another shot back, and then another, and then hits his devastating hook! Krenshov is brushed back, but not towards the edge as that's where Kryenik it standing - boot to the stomach from Krenshov doubles Kryenik over, oh no! GOOZLE!

JACK JONES: En Nomini Patri, et Filii, et Spiritu Sancti. Amen.

BILL HEWSON: HOW ARE YOU ENJOYING THIS!?! SOMEONE STOP THE DAMN MATCH, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!

Krenshov looks right into Kryenik's eyes.

KRENSHOV: You're gonna die, Sick Billy.

Kryenik looks back at him, emotionless.

KRYENIK: Then you're comin' with me.

And with that, he GRABS KRENSHOV AND PULLS HIM OFF THE EDGE OF THE BALCONY ALONG WITH HIM, RIGHT THROUGH THE TABLES!

And the reaction is DEFEANING! THE CROWD HAS GONE WILD; PEOPLE ARE LITERALLY HANGING FROM THE RAFTERS! "HOLY (BLEEP), HOLY (BLEEP), HOLY (BLEEP)" louder than you've EVER heard it before.

BILL HEWSON: MY GOD! BILLY KRYENIK JUST PULLED KRENSHOV RIGHT DOWN INTO HELL!

JACK JONES: OK, OK, I JUST REALIZED I DIDN'T WANT TO SEE THIS! SOMEONE, SOMEONE PLEASE GET OUT HERE AND STOP THIS, NOW! NOW!

But no one's stopping this one, baby. Deathrow is up, and he's shaking the cobwebs out. Casino, looking down in horror, realizes that this has just become one on one with perhaps the sickest son of a bitch on planet earth. And he walks down the steps, and right into Deathrow's face. The crowd is dangerously close to a Churchill Downs level full-scale riot, but this time it's out of sheer excitement. Casino and Deathrow stand-off. And start trading blows like crazed animals! Tommy's all over Casino, and he's beating him back towards the entrance ramp! Casino tries to fight back, but he just can't brawl with Tommy, he's too good of a striker. They fight all the way back up the entrance, and wind up in the ring. Casino manages to get in a thumb to the eye, and BANKRUPT! BANKRUPT ON TOMMY DEATHROW!

Sharplin gets in position and counts the fall.

ONE, TWO, NOT THREE! NOT THREE!

BILL HEWSON: HOW DID HE DO THAT?!? Is Tommy Deathrow even HUMAN?

JACK JONES: I'm...speechless.

Casino isn't even mad - he's just shocked. "What the hell do I have to do? I'll kill this (BLEEP) if I have to!" He picks up a chair and raises it high over Tommy's head. He brings it down with enough force to crush his skull - but TOMMY MOVED! He somehow gets up and hits a Russian Leg Sweep on Casino, and they lay down on the mat, exhausted. Somehow, someway, Deathrow finds a way to his feet and picks up the original table! He wastes no time setting it up and wrapping some barbed wire around his fist. As Casino struggles to his feet, Deathrow walks over to him and plasters him with a barbed wire fist.

BILL HEWSON: You're not going to believe me, but, uh, Billy Kryenik is getting up. I'm serious.

And Honest Hewson is. Kryenik is crawling out of the wreckage, and actually barrel-rolling down the ring because he's too weak to walk, leaving a grisly trail of blood on the ramp. He finally makes it to apron, but he's too weak to get up and climb into the ring. Inside, Deathrow is hammering away on Casino and he places him on the table. He gets up on it with him, and Casino tries to get off but gets another hard fist to keep him where he is. Casino fumbles for Deathrow's face, trying to push him off, trying to escape - but Deathrow offers him no mercy. He picks him up!

BILL HEWSON: DEATHROW DRIVER!

JACK JONES: That's it, he killed him.

The crowd explodes as Casino's head is driven through the table, breaking it in half. Deathrow is too weak to cover....But Billy Kryenik has finally managed enough strength to get into the ring. He rolls his near-lifeless body on top of Chris Casino.

ONEEEEEEE!

TWOOOOOO!

THREEEEEEEEE!

FRANK WARBURTON: HERE ARE YOUR WINNERS, THE DOOOOOOOOOMMMMRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIDEEERS!

BILL HEWSON: IT'S OVER! IT'S OVER! THE DOOMRIDERS RIDE HIGH HERE TONIGHT, IN ONE OF THE MOST INSANE, SICK, SADISTIC MATCHES YOU WILL EVER SEE - BUT, MY GOD, THEY DID IT! THEY BEAT CASINO, THEY BEAT THE UNTOUCHABLES!

JACK JONES: I've never seen anything like that in my life - that was the most intense competition I've ever seen in my life. I can't believe what he just witnessed. I don't think it'll really hit me for a few days.

BILL HEWSON: That may be so, but I can tell you that no one involved in this match will ever be the same again - they may have lost years on their lives!

JACK JONES: I think I've lost years on mine!

In the ring, Casino, Kryenik, and Deathrow are all lying on the canvas. Blood is everywhere; it's stained the mat as some kind of bizarre remembrance of the match. The fans are still going wild, and they haven't stopped for quite some time. Deathrow gets up first, and helps his best friend to his feet, holding him up to give him a big, bloody hug. A disgusting image, but a lasting and touching one nonetheless. Casino has been rolled out of the ring by Potts and Havok, and Kren