02/20/2006

NAPW returns to FINCH, rising intensity, and MINSTREL making his entrance to a huge rain of boos! Minstrel makes his way down the ring, his mask making him look eerie. But look at him! He's skipping, wearing a purple suit over his ring gear. And he sure seems happy as he rolls into the ring. The crowd continues to boo him, and Minstrel blows a raspberry and gives himself the thumbs down!

BILL HEWSON: And this match...this match is personal beyond anything in the NAPW. Last week, this man...this psychotic clown... abducted Maniac's wife Noelle Thomas! He's had her all week...I don't even know what to make of the situation, Jack Jones.

JACK JONES: There's a rule in wrestling --- don't bring your wives into it! Dames bring nothing but trouble. But what Minstrel's done...that's going too far, Bill Hewson, and I wouldn't want to be in his shoes when Maniac comes through that curtain!

And like that..."HERE I AM! ON THE ROAD AGAIN!" TURN THE PAGE! METALLICA! And...MANIAC RUSHES THE RING. Maniac slides into the ring and Frank Warburton sits right back down in his seat because IT'S ON! Maniac's on Minstrel like a rabid piranha, throwing BIG RIGHTS on the Jokeman and rocking him off his feet at the bell. Minstrel on the ground, Maniac capitalizing with a hard rain of foot-stomps to his ribs. The King of Kings has just stomped himself a mud-hole, and now he's walking it dry, stepping away from his opponent while the crowd roars for him--WAIT A MINUTE! Baseball Slide into Minstrel! Sending him rolling out of the ring! Minstrel rolls out to the ringside floor, limp as a rag doll! Maniac raises his fist, shouts "NAPW!", and flips out of the ring to where his opponent is. While the crowd keeps the NAPW chant alive, Maniac's stalking Minstrel with DEADLY INTENT, Senior Referee Dick Kiebiech has already started a count-out, Maniac grabs--SNAPT! Minstrel's long metal cane has just appeared in his hand out of NOWHERE! He lets loose with an overhead--MANIAC! CAUGHT IT! He defiantly catches the cane with ONE HAND and yanks it out of the stunned Minstrel's hand... SNAPT! Now he's holding a string of ribbons instead. Which means that Maniac's a little confused... HEAD BUTT by Minstrel, waffling Maniac with that Greek mask! Minstrel hops forward, Head butt number TWO, sending Maniac reeling backwards! Minstrel stats running in place to build up speed--shades of the great Barney Rubble here--and explodes towards his opponent--HEY! Maniac reverses into a headlock, and he's hoisting Minstrel skyward with his free hand... High-Rise DDT! At ringside! Right in front of all of the fans, each one of them screaming "HOLY SHIT!"

BILL HEWSON: How can we keep up with this! MANIAC...is coming out, but he somehow has to get his anger restrained! He can't get DQed, he can't get counted out! JACK JONES: Maniac might be blind with rage, but he's got RING INSTINCT. Eleven years in the business does that to you!

Maniac rolls back into the ring, BARELY avoiding Kiebiech's "TEN" count, then rolls back out with the extra time he's just bought himself. Pulling Minstrel up by the hair, he's aiming him at the guard rail, and goes to smash--BLOCKED! Minstrel put the brakes on with his hands, and takes the opportunity to smash MANIAC'S face into the guard rail. WHAMMO! The Lord of the Ring is standing, but dazed, Minstrel's on the attack... KICK! KICK! A climb-up enziguri to drop the eleven-year veteran. The crowd boos Minstrel, and he's wasting no time climbing up to the ring apron. He checks out the angry crowd and decides it's THUMBS DOWN for Minstrel! OFF THE APRON! And it's A LEG DROP! TO THE BACK OF MANIAC'S HEAD! BY GAWD! Maniac could out be out cold! And Minstrel's sitting on his back, steering an imaginary wheel and going "VROOM"... SOMEONE TELL ME WHY! Kiebiech's count has gone up to eight, thank God HE'S the official, giving Minstrel no option but to snap out of it and throw Maniac into the ring before this match ends in double-count-out. Maniac's been rolled into the ring, Minstrel's on the ring apron, we've seen this before, and it doesn't always--SLINGSHOT! MOONSAULT!--CONNECTS! He's just DRILLED Maniac with impact! Pin cover, this could be IT--ONE! TWO! KICK OUT! Minstrel sits up with the kick-out, laughing hysterically. He stands Maniac up and sends him into the ropes, getting ready to hit the BACK BODY--KNEE LIFT! Maniac reverses with a stiff knee shot to Minstrel's mask instead! Minstrel's been taken unaware, KICKWHAMNO!!! The Jokeman soaks up the kick but powers out of the Headhunter! And now an INVERTED DDT sends his opponent crashing back down to the mat! Maniac's lifeless on his back, Minstrel prodding him with his toe for good measure... and then he starts a slow, sick thumb across his throat. That can only mean one thing... with the crowd fevered to an angry pitch, Minstrel climbs up to the top rope--KILLING JOKE! RIGHT INTO MANIAC'S BRAIN! Minstrel whoops and hooks the leg--ONE! TWO! THRNOOO!!! IT WAS TWO! MANIAC KICKED OUT! MANIAC KICKED OUT! And Minstrel's NOT LAUGHING, that was his FINISHER!

JACK JONES: Holy HELL, MINSTREL IS PISSED!

BILL HEWSON: Minstrel's not laughing now! NOBODY'S kicked out of the Killing Joke!

Minstrel rolls out of the ring, pulls Frank Warburton off of his chair, takes it, takes an empty chair, puts it where the first chair used to be, then sits him back down. Then, ARMED WITH A CHAIR, Minstrel slides back into the ring, consequences be damned! He's rearing back with it, ready to smash it overhand on Maniac as he just finds his hands and knees--AND KIEBIECH'S GOT IT! He's seized the chair from Minstrel and starts REAMING him out for it! Minstrel's too busy arguing the point--LOW BLOW! By MANIAC! And there's NO WAY Kiebiech could have CAUGHT it! Minstrel's in a bad way here, MANIAC'S GOT A BACKSLIDE! ONE! TWO! KICK-OUT! Maniac's smiling an evil smile here--HE'S in control now! He's under-hooked both of Minstrel's arms--BUTTERFLY SUPLEX! And Minstrel's just hit the mat like a sack of pancakes. Maniac floats over, sits on his chest and hauls him up by the neck--REVERSE DRAGON SLEEPER! Bending Minstrel's spine in unnatural ways! Minstrel's laughing almost uncontrollably now, desperately lunging for the ropes with his long legs, even though every lunge he makes sinks the hold in even more! Minstrel only has a few inches to go--MADE IT! Maniac's being instructed to let the hold go--HE WON'T! ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! Maniac lets go at the last possible second, stretching Minstrel out for as long as he could. Hauls him up, SHORT-ARM CLOTHESLINE puts him back down. Another haul-up leads to Maniac whipping the Insane One into the corner turnbuckle. Maniac calls to the crowd--

"LORD OF THE RING!"

--"AND KING OF KINGS!", they reply--a STIFF Harley-Race-like knee into Minstrel in the corner. Minstrel staggers out of the corner, and Maniac's taking a RARE trip to the top rope--Minstrel's turning around--FLYING LARIAT! Minstrel does 360¼, at LEAST. Maniac's stalking Minstrel, he's got HEADHUNTIN' on his mind--MINSTREL! with a desperation Irish Whip to counter, Maniac counters THAT and reverses the whip! Minstrel's off the ropes and in big trouble, WAIT A MINUTE! Minstrel's hopped up on Maniac's shoulders, HURACAN--NO!!! Maniac's just shoved him OFF! KICKWHAMHEADHUNTER! Minstrel's DOWN and Maniac COVERS--ONE! TWO! LEG ON THE ROPES! MINSTREL'S DAMNED LEG GOT ON THE ROPES! And now it's MANIAC'S turn to look incredulous! Both men are at ABSOLUTE BOILING POINT, but neither one can seem to end this match! Maniac stands in sheer frustration, looks down at his opponent, says something unprintable, and then drags him away from the ropes. With determination, he stuffs Minstrel's head between his thighs, lifts him up for a PILE DRIVER-- except MINSTREL rolls up and tags Maniac in the head! And now both men come crashing down, with Minstrel on Maniac's shoulders! Kiebiech's there for the count--MINSTREL LEANING FORWARD TO GRAB THE ROPES! ONE! TWO! THREE! He just STOLE another vict--WAIT A MINUTE! He's slipping BRASS KNUCKS off of his hand and into his tights! That's how he did it, and it was too fast for Kiebiech to notice!

FRANK WARBURTON: The winner of the match by pinfall...MINNNNSTRELLLL!

BILL HEWSON: I don't believe it! What a horrible, horrible way for Maniac to lose this match! He --- WAIT A MINUTE! MANIAC IS UP!

JACK JONES: Oh, (BLEEP)!

And MANIAC has just leapt on an exhausted Minstrel...AND STARTS TAKING THE PISS OUT OF HIM! MANIAC WITH RIGHT HANDS! "WHERE'S NOELLE?!!" he screams... POW! "WHERE'S NOELLE?!!" POW! "WHERE'S NOELLE?!!" POW! Minstrel...there is red blood streaming out the bottom of his Greek Tragedy mask, which is rapidly staining red. Minstrel...laughs. LAUGHS. And everytime he laughs, Maniac punches him HARDER, and everytime Maniac punches him harder, Minstrel laughs, and MANIAC PUNCHS HIM HARDER. "WHERES'S NOELLE, WHERE IS SHE, WHERE IS SHE?!!"

Suddenly. She is there. In the aisle, looking worse for wear in a tye-dyed shirt and old jeans. She looks dazed, almost walking comatose. Maniac continues to destroy Minstrel, screaming, not seeing. Until. Until. Until.

He sees her out of the corner of his eye. And suddenly his whole world changes, the red fades from his eyes. He rushes out of the ring and with a wracked sob, buries his head in her bosom. Noelle is glassy-eyed as her husband embraces her, labored, desperate. He looks at her eyes, tears coming to his, and buries his head against her shoulder again. Slowly...life returns to her eyes. Some. She strokes her husband's hair, and he nearly collapses in relief at the signs of recognition, of life. He looks at her, the crowd looking on at what should be a private reunion. Noelle whispers. "No more...let's go home, please... my darling...let's go home." Maniac swings Noelle up in his arms, cradling her body against his powerful chest. He flicks one last glance back at a giggling Minstrel and walks up the aisle.

He stands at the entrance curtain, pausing, and then, at a strange sound, turns around to look over the arena. EACH and EVERY fan in the building is standing, applauding, showing respect. Showing love. Showing humanity. Maniac's eyes shut tightly and then, with a whirl, Michael & Noelle Thomas exeunt.

Minstrel...giggles.

NAPW fades in, the crowd still seeming very moved by the reunion of Maniac & his wife just five minutes ago. Cut to Bill Hewson & Jack Attack Jones, looking into the camera from their announce desk.

BILL HEWSON: And we would like to offer the best wishes to Noelle Thomas for a speedy recovery, and truly, Maniac --- Michael Thomas --- must be grateful that this has ended so well.

JACK JONES: Bill Hewson, Michael Thomas is bloody fortunate that his wife is in the shape she's in. Minstrel's a sick, sick man. Even I'm not going to defend him!

BILL HEWSON: Surely Maniac lost the match here tonight, but in the end, he won. I think I speak for everybody behind-the-scenes with NAPW in saying to the Thomas'... "Good luck... and thank you."

"EVEN MORE HUMAN THEN HUMAN", man. Who is? REX CALIBER, THAT'S WHO IS. The bald, muscle-bound Nexus One strides out of the curtain with an intense look on his face, and just a step behind him is his tag team partner --- the hardcore luchadore STATIC. Some fans boo, but quite a few cheer for the combined unit known as THE CRIMES!

JACK JONES: If I'm Cameron Scott --- and thank GOD, I'm not --- I take one look at the intensity on Rex Caliber's face and I think twice about even coming to the ring.

BILL HEWSON: Certainly we haven't seen this kind of focus from The Nexus One in some time, but the man seems to have an addiction to gold... and he'll do anything to get it.

Rex walks up the ring steps into the ring, and Static follows in, leaning on the ropes. Caliber reaches into his leather vest pocket and pulls out...a vial of blood? He opens it, dabs his finger in it and writes "CAM" in blood in the corner. Oh dear. Rex Caliber...is focused. But you know what? That music now, that music is KISS, and that means...

BILL HEWSON: ...AND THE DUDES back down from no man!

JACK JONES: Huh. Even The Dudes look focused. What, did somebody spike the water in the locker room? Everybody's intense tonight!

Cameron Scott is first, Michael K Johnston right behind him. And The Dudes do not seem to be their jovial selves, not even seeming altogether happy to be out there together...

BILL HEWSON: And of course, conspicuous by her absence is one Tiffany Macintyre, who this week was Dragon Suplexed --- needlessly --- on a concrete floor by Ravager, a man who was supposedly her friend.

JACK JONES: Hey, Ravager's never pretended to be anything other than what he is. Business is business, Bill Hewson, and distractions need to be eliminated. Even pretty female ones.

BILL HEWSON: A defenseless woman, not a trained wrestler!

JACK JONES: ...we are talking about RAVAGER, right? Any Hit For The Right Price!

BILL HEWSON: ...nonetheless, we wish Tiffany Macintyre a speedy recovery. I'm sure she wishes she could be here for this match. Cameron Scott is clearly looking to 'win this one for Tiff,' but Rex Caliber isn't going to give him any quarter. Not with a title shot and the Canada Cup at stake!

Cameron Scott gets in the ring and perches on the middle turnbuckle to a round of cheers and "Tiff! Tiff! Tiff!" chants. Cameron points down the aisle, and makes the "belt around his waist" motion. He hops down and stares off with Rex Caliber. Both tag team partners are at ringside near the appropriate corners, looking on with interest. Frank Warburton is in the ring!

FRANK WARBURTON: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and is a CANADA CUP SEMI-FINAL CONTEST! Introducing first... from Lloydminster Alberta, he is one half of the seminal tag team combination of THE DUDES! Weighing in at TWO-hundred and eighty pounds... "QUARTERBACK" CAMERONNNNN SCOTT! And his opponent, accompanied to the ring by his CRIMES partner STATIC... weighing two-hundred and forty five pounds, he hails from PARTS UNKNOWN...NORTH CAROLINA... THE NEXUS ONE, RRRRREX CALIBERRRR!

The referee calls for the bell and like wild animals Rex and Cameron attack each other! Cameron Scott is apparently more upset about Tiffany then he thought, and didn't take kindly to Rex Caliber's comments on the situation. The two men stand in the middle of the ring trading punches, neither willing to give an inch! Cameron starts to get the better of Rex and starts unloading one hard right hand after another to The Nexus One! Rex brings his knee up into the ribs of Scott, breaking the onslaught and then snapmares him to the mat. Rex hits the near ropes and hits a soccer kick across the chest of Scott! Rex quickly pulls Cameron up to his feet and hurls him through the ropes to the outside. And Static...Static...shows respect, and rolls Cameron back in the ring! Mike rushes over and shoves Static, telling him to keep his hands off of Cameron. Static fires back angrily, saying "I was just putting him the ring, eff off!" BILL HEWSON: Looks like things between The Dudes and The Crimes are already starting to get out of hand.

JACK JONES: The Dudes started it. As always.

BILL HEWSON: Will you be serious?

Inside the ring, Rex hits a brutal belly to belly suplex and goes for a quick cover, ONE, TWO, Cameron kicks out easily! Rex pulls Scott to his feet, but Cameron surprises Rex with a shoulder block to the ribs that leaves The Nexus One doubled over. Scott grabs an arm and whips Caliber into the ropes and nails a sidewalk slam on his opponent! Before he can go for a cover though, Rex rolls to the outside. Mike Johnston meets him right there, telling Rex to get back in the ring! Static rushes to his partner's aid, now he's telling Mike to "Keep his hands off of Rex!" Caliber rolls back inside the ring! The referee screams at Static to get to his corner as behind him Cameron whips Caliber into the far corner and follows him in with a big splash! Rex stumbles out of the corner straight into a clothesline!

BILL HEWSON: Cameron Scott in full control of this match! An interesting point here, both of these men are former NAPW Tag Team Champions with their respective partners!

JACK JONES: Emphasis on "former" Bill. But since I don't see STYLIN' KYLE or THE BEAST out here, we don't have THE champions in the building.

Cameron is pulling a dazed Rex to his feet, when Caliber grabs a handful of jean shorts and uses his leverage to send Scott tumbling out of the ring to the floor! Static looks him over...and finally can't resist! He is on him in a heartbeat throwing rights and lefts at the hurting Dude! Mike Johnson has seen enough and he circles the ring and clubs Static from behind with a double axe handle blow to the back! Rex sees his partner in trouble and rolls to the outside where ALL HELL officially breaks loose! OFFICIALLY. As the four men battle along ringside the referee shakes his head in disgust and calls the ring announcer over. They confer for a moment and then the referee calls for the bell.

BILL HEWSON: What's going on? Has the referee thrown this thing out?

JACK JONES: There's no way The Crimes should be punished for the way The Dudes have constantly interfered in this match!

The fighting along ringside has stopped and all four men are yelling at the referee for answers. The ring announcer stands up on his chair and addresses the crowd.

FRANK WARBURTON: The referee has declared that this match...Is now a TAG TEAM MATCH!

The wrestlers look shocked and the fans voice their approval!

BILL HEWSON: The referee has obviously had enough of the outside interference so he turned this singles match into a tag team encounter!

JACK JONES: This is a conspiracy!

BILL HEWSON: You think EVERYTHING's a conspiracy! Call the damn action!

The Dudes attack a still distracted Crimes team and send them scurrying back onto the ring! The bell sounds and the match begins. Again. Inside the ring, all four men are brawling it out as the referee tries to get some order! Mike sends Static into the ropes and hits a high back body drop on the masked superstar! The referee finally separates Cameron and Rex and sends them to their respective corners as Mike K. Johnson stomps away at Static! Johnson scoops Static off the mat only to slam him roughly back down and follows it up with a standing moonsault! Johnson points the nearest turnbuckle and the crowd roars. Johnson quickly climbs to the top and takes flight with an attempted top rope leg drop! Static rolls out of the way at the last second and The Dude eats canvas!

JACK JONES: I gotta question, what if Static pins Johnson? Does that mean Static moves ahead in the tournament?

BILL HEWSON: Your guess is as good as mine, partner.

Static rolls to the outside and perches himself on the ring apron as Johnson is getting back to his feet. Static uses his amazing agility and springs up to the top rope to hit a seated senton on Mike Johnson! He hooks a leg as the referee counts, ONE...TWO...Johnson kicks out! Static pulls Johnson to his feet and shoots him into the corner of The Crimes. He tags in Rex and the two men team up to hit a double suplex on The Dude! Rex goes for a cover but Cameron rushes in and breaks it up before the referee can start a count! Rex laughs as he drags Johnson to his feet and whips him into the far ropes. Caliber drops his head early and gets hit with a swinging neckbreaker! Johnson reaches out and tags in Cameron who rushes in and starts to pound away at Caliber!

BILL HEWSON: There might be respect between these two teams, but there's no love lost between them either!

JACK JONES: ...What the hell does that even mean?

Static rushes in to help his partner and takes a backdrop over the top ropes from Johnson! As Rex and Cameron do battle, Johnson springs over the top rope and lands on Static with a cross body block! Back inside the ring, Rex is shot into the ropes and hit with a devastating LINEBACKER TACKLE! Cameron goes for the cover as the referee makes his count, ONE...TWO...Rex kicks out! On the outside, Johnson whips Static towards the ring steps only to watch as the masked marvel leaps to the top step and execute an asai moonsault back onto The Dude! The crowd happily chant "HOLY SHIT" for the high risk maneuver. Back inside the ring, with Rex laying prone on the mat, Cameron goes to the nearest turnbuckle and starts to climb. The referee is looking at Cameron and doesn't see Rex as he uses his foot to shove the referee into the ropes! The move causes Cameron to loose his balance and crotch himself on the top turnbuckle! The referee reads Rex the riot act, but Caliber explains it off as an accident.

BILL HEWSON: That should have be a DQ!

JACK JONES: Yeah and this match should have been just between Rex and Cameron but look what happened with that!

Rex hurls Cameron off the top rope to the center of the ring! And in a flash, he's on Cameron Scott locking in the RINGS OF REX submission maneuver! On the outside Static simply wraps himself around the legs of Michael Johnson keeping him from entering the ring as Cameron strains to get out of the punishing hold! The referee is in the face of Cameron who is shaking his head "No!" On the outside Michael pokes the eye of Static forcing him to release his grip and he slides into the ring...Just as Cameron Scott finally starts nodding "yes!" to the referee! The ref calls for the bell and Rex quickly releases the hold and rolls to the outside!

FRANK WARBURTON: The winner of the match...and advancing to the FINALS of the CANADA CUP...REXXXX CALIBERRRRR!

Static looks quite pleased, and Rex Caliber nearly ecstatic, as The Crimes leave the ringside area. They look on as inside the ring Michael K. Johnson looks down at Cameron Scott. The look on Johnson's face is that of bitter disappointment, but Cameron Scott doesn't look much happier, questioning Mike "Where were you? WHERE WERE YOU?" The crowd is worried as The Dudes argue in the ring...

BILL HEWSON: After a wild singles AND tag team match we have one of the finalists in the Canada Cup...and that man is REX CALIBER.

JACK JONES: Yeah, but check out inside the ring. Looks like some trouble in paradise!

BILL HEWSON: Cameron Scott with a heartbreaking loss tonight, and you know that the condition of their manager Tiffany Macintyre is weighing on their minds heavily. I'm confident Scott and Johnston will work this out, Jack Jones. They're THE DUDES. When we come back... it will be the other Canada Cup match! Casino! Kryenik! And it's NEXT!

NAPW returns and already, it's "CELESTIAL" by Isis playing and bringing down to the ring, all up in his jean shorts and cut-off t-shirt none other than DOOMRIDER "SICK" BILLY KRYENIK! Billy comes through the curtain and heads to the ring, looking anxious without his pet rabbit Col. Giggles by his side. He steps into the ring, receiving a fairly sizeable pop from the crowd.

BILL HEWSON: Kryenik in the ring, now, and all week long the Wrestling World has been talking about this match, as Kryenik meets Chris Casino in the semi-finals!

JACK JONES: Tell me about it. This is why Chris Casino is brilliant, starting the Canada Cup! We're getting all kinds of matches we might never have gotten anyways.

Kryenik waits. FRANK~! hits, and out walks...with Terry Brandon... the man himself, CHRIS CASINO. His long blonde hair is tied back in a ponytail and he wears his usual cocky, self-assured expression. Brandon is less composed than usual, but still talks up his man to the camera on the way to the ring, silver briefcase in hand. They hit the ring, and Casino mugs for the fans who respond with a hearty round of boos.

BILL HEWSON: I'm actually surprised to see Terry Brandon out here with Casino, after what Casino did to Lobo last week!

JACK JONES: Bill Hewson, Lobo might be Brandon's kid, but family comes after business in wrestling. And it's Chris Casino who brings in the dollars, NOT Brandon's illegitimate son!

BILL HEWSON: Maybe Brandon will get to stay at ringside longer then he did during Evan Cartwright's match...

Wrong, Bill Hewson, because the referee is already ejecting Brandon from ringside! There will be NO managers, no additional people at ringside! Col. Giggles is banned? So is Brandon! Brandon is irate!

BILL HEWSON: Well. Brandon just can't win tonight...

FRANK WARBURTON: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and is a semi-final match in the CANADA CUP TOURNAMENT! Introducing first... from Windsor Ontario! He weighs in at two-hundred and forty one pounds...ladies and gentlemen... DOOMRIDER! SICK BILLLLYYYYY KRYENNNNNIK! And his opponent, a former NAPW Heavyweight Champion! From Las Vegas Nevada, weighing in at two-hundred and twenty pounds... CHRRRRRRRIS CASINNNNNOOOO!

DING DING DING. The bell sounds and this match is under way. Both men circle one another, lock-up...Casino slaps Kryenik across the face and then bounds off to play to the crowd. Kryenik grins? Another lock-up...Kryenik slaps Casino on the ass! Casino looks pissed off, launches a right hand, Kryenik blocks and fires off his own right hook! And that sends Casino stumbling, calling for a time-out in the corner! The referee gets in the way of Kryenik going to work, and Casino uses that opportunity to jab his thumb in Kryenik's eye! Casino hits the snap suplex on Kryenik with authority! Kryenik pops up, takes another snap suplex! Casino goes up and drives the knee, classic Flair style! Cover gets a short two. Casino grabs a handful of Kryenik's greasy hair and drags him to the corner, where he starts chopping. WHOOO! WHOOO! WHOOO! Wait a minute! Kryenik just reached out and grabbed Casino by both ears! He spins Casino around, ripping and tearing, and then RAMS his shoulder into Casino's mid-section! Two! Three shoulders right into Casino's gut, and now Kryenik gets some space as Casino slumps... CHARGE! Huge running boot right across Chris Casino's face!

BILL HEWSON: Couple more of those and Chris Casino's going to have to shell out for plastic surgery to keep his good looks in hand!

JACK JONES: ...well, it's not like he couldn't afford it. I mean, he is giving away ONE-HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS of his own personal money to the winner of the tournament, not to mention a title shot! Who, you know. He figures is him. He's Chris Casino, DAMMIT!

Back to the action, Billy Kryenik props up a dazed Chris Casino, hits the ropes...LARIATOOOOO! Casino is turned inside out, and Kryenik covers! That gets two. Kryenik grabs an arm and starts...WRESTLING. The hardcore bastard knows how to mix it up, Malenko-style! Kryenik dominates Casino on the canvas and paintbrushes the back of Casino's head to further insult him! Casino gets up, livid, and argues with the referee, saying Kryenik was pulling his hair --- ROLL UP! Kryenik gets one, two, th---almost stole a win right there! The crowd is hot for Billy Kryenik. Not that way. Sickos. "Let's go Billy, Let's go Billy" chants break out as Kryenik catches a charging and furious Chris Casino with a release belly-to-belly suplex, sending Casino flying out of the ring and all the way to the outside. Kryenik looks it over, gets a big grin on his face and baseball slides out of the ring, catches Casino with a swinging neckbreaker right on the concrete floor! Kryenik gets up quickly and starts stomping away on Casino --- LOW BLOW! Chris Casino with a desperate low blow to buy some time, and now he's got an opportunity to get the momentum back on his side. Casino picks Kryenik up atomic-drop style...and drops him crotch first on the guardrail! Target the injured body part, right? And...well, look at this. DEVASTATION is making another appearance, coming from the curtain and walking about halfway down the aisle.

JACK JONES: Well, I hope Chris Casino doesn't disappoint Devastation like Evan did earlier.

BILL HEWSON: I remember you saying Cartwright was a helluva man, a helluva wrestler!

JACK JONES: He is! But he still lost, and Devastation didn't look very impressed!

BILL HEWSON: ...CHRIS CASINO IS A FORMER NAPW CHAMPION! Who is this guy coming in and talking about Casino like he's some rookie scrub? MY GOD! I'm defending Chris Casino! I feel so dirty! CASINO sends Kryenik into the steel ring post!

Indeed he does! Casino rolls Kryenik into the ring before the referee can hit a ten-count, which would count BOTH men out of the ring and give the tournament victory to Rex Caliber by default! Casino doesn't want to lose that way...he doesn't want to lose at all! And it looks like Kreynik has been busted open by that steel ring post, he's got some color on his forehead. Casino steps behind him and starts to claw open the wound further! And now he's applied a sleeper hold on the canvas. CHRIS CASINO IS OLD SCHOOL! The crowd boos the sleeper hold, and Casino grins. "OH YEAH?" He hauls Kryenik up...and NAILS the Caribbean Backbreaker, falling backwards with both of his knees into Kryenik's back! STANDING MOONSAULT! ONE! TWO! TH---TWO! Only two. Casino argues with the referee about the count, but gives it up quickly and goes back to work on Billy Kryenik. Scoop and a slam...and Billy Kryenik is laying prone in the center of the ring as Chris Casino goes to the top turnbuckle! He signals for it! THE PRETTIEST ELBOW DROP IN THE BUSINESS! And it CONNECTS right into the sternum of Billy Kryenik! Casino poses briefly for the fans, because he is THAT AWESOME, and then hits the cover. ONE. TWO. THREE----NO. Kryenik has kicked out of the flying elbow drop! Casino groans, sure he had it right there. He pulls Kryenik up by the hair and throws a few forearm shivers. "You want some HOT SALVATION, bitch?" he yells? Irish whip on Kryenik... Kryenik rebounds off the ropes INTO THE CASINO SUPERKICK. Kryenik takes it square in the jaw and crumbles. Casino twirls around, gloating, and Kryenik POPS UP! CASINO---EATS A KRYENIK SUPERKICK! Billy falls right back down, and so does Chris Casino! Both men are down, and the referee makes with the standing ten count!

BILL HEWSON: UN-BELIEVABLE! Somehow Billy Kryenik was able to pop up and hit a superkick of his own! Both men are down and out, and Billy Kryenik has kicked out of Chris Casino's best moves!

JACK JONES: Dueling superkicks, Bill Hewson! Never thought I'd see something like that outside of Japan!

The referee is on his six count before either man stirs. Casino looks to be the first man on his feet, the shock of Kryenik's unexpected superkick notwithstanding. He gets to his feet as Kryenik is still barely stirring, and he heads TO THE TOP ROPE! Casino shaking his head, shaking loose the cobwebs and yelling for Kryenik to get up. Kryenik is now up, and Casino flies off the top rope with a missile dropkick --- Kryenik sidesteps and shoves Casino down to the canvas HARD. Casino bounces once and Billy Kryenik is all over him! And just like, Kryenik has the BRANCH BREAKER on Chris Casino! Casino may tap out right here, in this very ring! Kryenik using that STF, digging his knees into Casino's spine for added leverage, and Chris Casino very well may tap. The referee is asking Casino "Give up, Chris? Chris, do you give up?" and Casino grabs the referee by the collar with his free hand and shoves him away. Casino slowly, slowly...MAKES the ropes. Kryenik holds on to the move, doing as much damage as he can, when SUDDENLY --- FROM THE CURTAIN ---

JACK JONES: I don't believe it.

BILL HEWSON: Neither do. It's...THE PRICE IS RIGHT's BOB BARKER. Casino really did fly him up to Edmonton...AND HE'S GOT COL. GIGGLES!

JACK JONES: Have your pets spayed or neutered. Or in this case, made into STEW.

And Kryenik releases the hold, screaming at Bob Barker who is walking down the aisle. Devastation backs to the guardrail, looking on with a bemused expression on his face. Barker has a knife to the throat of the poor rabbit, when suddenly...DOOMRIDER TOMMY DEATHROW bursts from the curtain with blood trickling from his nose!

JACK JONES: Barker---or SOMEBODY---must have nailed Deathrow, he wouldn't just give Giggles over!

Tommy Deathrow NAILS Barker from behind! Giggles drops to the concrete and scampers to the side, as Tommy Deathrow...sticks Barker's head between his legs!

BILL HEWSON: He's not going...OH MY GOD! DEATHROW DRIVER ON THE CONCRETE! TOMMY DEATHROW JUST PILEDROVE AN EIGHTY-YEAR OLD MAN INTO THE CONCRETE!

JACK JONES: A PSYCHOTIC eighty-year old man, Hewson, get your facts straight!

Deathrow licks some blood off of his face and throws down on Barker, yelling "THE PRICE IS WRONG, BITCH!" He grabs Col. Giggles in one arm and then...well, flashes the Richard Nixon V FOR VICTORY pose to Kryenik. Kryenik grins and turns around --- and gets hooked by Chris Casino! Casino setting up for a BRAINBUSTER, and it CONNECTS! Casino's had enough of this match, enough of Billy Kryenik, and he goes up top for the CASH OUT. But Billy Kryenik is somehow up, and he runs up the turnbuckle to meet Casino on top! We've got a struggle on the top turnbuckle...Kryenik drops off! Casino changes plans, flies off with HURACANRANA! But wait a minute, Kryenik is holding him up! Powerbomb? No, Kryenik spins Casino around...ELECTRIC CHAIR DROP! COVER! ONE! TWO! TH---CASINO KICKS OUT! Kryenik wastes no time, sends him to the turnbuckle, that's reversed, Billy hits the corner. Casino charges in, Kryenik catches him with a drop toe-hold sending Chris Casino face-first into the middle turnbuckle! Casino is slumped over the middle turnbuckle as Kryenik gets room. Charge and a STIFF diving lariat right onto the shoulders and back of Casino's neck! Next, Kryenik perches Casino on the top turnbuckle, and goes up...he's going to GERMAN SUPLEX HIM OFF THE TOP ROPE! GOOD LORD, CASINO GOES FLYING! And Kryenik flies backwards, his feet hooked on the top rope to keep him from going! Casino literally flipped end over end and landed on his belly, the crowd chants HOLY SHIT for that! Kryenik smiles while upside down before taking his feet on the canvas again. Just for good measure, Kryenik nails a leg drop on the back of Casino's head and COVERS. ONE! TWO! THREEE----It's over---NO! CHRIS CASINO got his leg on the bottom rope!

JACK JONES: That's the sign of a ring veteran, Bill Hewson! The former NAPW Heavyweight champ always knows where he is inside the squared circle!

BILL HEWSON: My God, what more can these two men throw at each other? How can Billy Kryenik top a SUPER German Suplex?!

What, you ask? Why, THE DRY LAKE! Kryenik goes to hit The Dry Lake, but Casino swiftly back drops Kryenik over him! Casino rushes at Kryenik, and gets met with a STIFF LARIATOOOO---Casino ducks that, Kryenik turns around into a dropkick in the mush. He stumbles back against the ropes and Casino flies at him with a clothesline, Kryenik back drops Casino over the top rope. But Casino lands on the ring apron and hooks Kryenik for a suplex. He's trying to suplex Kryenik to the outside! Kryenik blocks, suplexes Chris Casino back into the ring! Casino flips out at the apex and lands behind, grabs a rear waistlock on Kryenik and goes for a roll-up, and he REACHS OUT AND GRABS THE ROPES! ONE! TWO! TH---Kryenik STILL kicks out! Casino swears audibly and then...gets an evil grin on his face. He waits for Kryenik to get up, and then boots him in the gut. Casino double-underhooks the arms...oh my, he's going to hit Kryenik with Kryenik's OWN FINISHER! THE DRY LAKE --- Kryenik squirms and counters out into a double-leg take down, he rolls over Chris Casino into a pinning situation, holding the legs! The referee counts! HE COUNTS ONE! HE COUNTS TWO! HE COUNTS... THREE!

FRANK WARBURTON: Here is YOUR WINNER...advancing to the FINALS of the Canada Cup...BILLLLYYYYY KRYENNNNNIKKKK!

BILL HEWSON: Billy Kryenik has eliminated CHRIS CASINO from Casino's OWN tournament! I don't believe it! What a match that was! What! A! MATCH!

And the Edmonton fans know it, on their feet with a standing ovation for both men! Except Devastation, who again shakes his head and exits through the curtain. Meanwhile, Chris Casino can't believe he lost! Kryenik is totally on fire, and jumps into the front row. When the hell did HE get over like this? Who knows! Kryenik rolls back into the ring...and Chris Casino meets him in the middle of the ring. Casino looks him over, what's going to happen here? Wait a minute. Chris Casino...offers his HAND to Billy Kryenik? Kryenik takes it, shakes, and Casino indeed shows respect for Billy LOW BLOW! Casino with a low blow to Billy Kryenik! The former NAPW Champion flips out of the ring and walks up the aisle with a grin on his face. Kryenik looks on, yet he's smiling through the pain in his groin? Maybe a strange show of respect by Chris Casino... Tommy Deathrow comes out through the curtain and stares down Casino in the aisle, but Casino raises his hands and says "Hey, I don't want none of you" and takes off. Deathrow gets in the ring and slaps Kryenik on the ass, before raising his hand high in the air!

BILL HEWSON: An unbelievable victory for Billy Kryenik, who now meets Rex Caliber in the tournament finals! In three days The Doomriders meet D-X for the TAG TEAM TITLES...and they have all the momentum in the world! We'll be right back!

JACK JONES: So then I say to the guy "I'll give you twenty-five dollars for the midget." And HE has the audacity to ---

BILL HEWSON: We are back, and moments away from one of the most bitter rematches in NAPW history. There is such enmity, such bad blood between these two men that this match has been made into a No Disqualification, No Count-out match. We MUST have a winner.

And then, it starts. Building, building, building, as familiar, epic entrance music comes to a roar. Through the curtain walks Christian Bale --- I mean, RAVAGER. He's dressed for war, in black short trunks, black boots, black kneepads. And he looks focused. The crowd reaction is split, clearly many fans are uncomfortable with the way Ravager won his title shot last week and his actions during the week, particularly the attack on Tiffany Macintyre. Yet many fans are still cheering for Ravager.

The challenger walks the ring steps and gets into the ring. There's no playing to the crowd, just pure intensity. A test of the ropes. And then a fixed gaze on the entrance curtain.

Silence...

"RIIIIIIIIGHT ---- BEFORE YOUR EYES!"

BILL HEWSON: The champion IS HERE!

D! POPS OUT OF THE CURTAIN, rarin' to go --- and is met with a hail of BOOS?! The initial pop suddenly gives way to a mixture of cheers and voracious boos, causing D! to momentarily lose his bearings. He recovers and sprints to the ring, slapping hands with those fans extending their hands, slides in the ring and rips the belt off, holding it above his head. The boos intensify?! D!, clearly thrown, tries not to pay them any heed but hands off his belt to Referee Dick Kiebiech. The ref holds the NAPW Championship high above his head, displaying it to all sides as Frank Warburton prepares to earn his paycheque.

FRANK WARBURTON: It is now time for the MAIN EVENT! The following contest is scheduled for one fall, with NO disqualification and NO count-outs... and is for the NAPW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing first the challenger, wearing black. Hailing from Brooklyn, New York, he weighs in at two-hundred and ten pounds and is a former two-time Provincial Champion. Ladies and gentlemen... THIS! IS! RAVAGER!

The crowd, again, mixed reaction but many are still behind Ravager. The man himself seems unfazed, never taking his eyes off of D!, who looks at him in utter disgust.

FRANK WARBURTON: And now, the CHAMPION! (booo). Wearing black and blue, he hails from right here in EDMONTON, ALBERTA (POP...boooo!), and is a two-time NAPW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION! Weighing in at two-hundred and ten pounds... THIS! IS! DEEEEEEEEEE!

BOOOOO CHEEEEER BOOOOOO! The crowd won't shut up! DING DING DING, and the match is official. Ravager and D! meet in the center of the ring, standing high to high. Physically, they are near mirror-images of one another sharing the same height and same weight. Obviously D!'s jeans-and-t-shirt attire prevent a strict comparison of either man's build, but nonetheless. Ravager stares intently, and D! jaws at him. "Oh, I bet you like this, don't you? What'd you do, pay off the entire crowd? With all your dirty money, huh? 'Business is business,' that's what it is, right? TIFFANY was just business----*" WHAM! Ravager has had about enough of D!'s shit-talk and drops him! D! fires back! Ravager fires! No quarter given. NONE TAKEN. RIGHT HAND. D! staggers from the stiffashell shot. And gives one right back. Ravager. D!. Slow, methodical, pounding right hands and the crowd is in awe at the sheer hatred in the ring.

BILL HEWSON: Good Lord, you can hear those shots reverberate throughout this gym, the sound of knuckles on cheek! These two men truly, deeply hate one another!

JACK JONES: You know, you really seem to think it's both ways, but did you ever listen? It's just business for Ravager. It's D! who's made this one personal! D! who's done everything he can to make Ravager a "monster" for him to fight, because D!...can't handle the fact that the fans don't seem to want to boo Ravager for doing things D! considers to be "wrong." I don't like the fans much, but you know what? They pay their money, they can cheer and boo whomever the hell they want!

BILL HEWSON: What are you, on crack? You defend Ravager's manipulative ways? You defend the way he won his title shot last week? You defend him DRAGON SUPLEXING Tiffany Macintyre and putting her in the hospital?

JACK JONES: What, when Ravager BEAT. D!. CLEAN? Yeah, I'll defend that! And as for Tiffany, hell, broads are death in this business! Why don't you ask MICHAEL THOMAS?

The crowd won't shut up, they just won't, and now it's dueling chants of "D! D! D! D!" with the other half of the crowd yelling "SUCKS!" And in the ring, both men are STILL STANDING, swaying on their feet from the stiff shots. RAVAGER takes over with a knee lift to the breadbasket, and sends D! down with a russian leg sweep, knocking the champion's head on the canvas. D! rolls over on his side, and Ravager immediately applies a hammerlock on the canvas. He forces D! back to his feet...and hits a BACK SUPLEX on the twisted arm! D! writhing in pain, holding his right arm. Ravager pauses momentarily and then stomps the right knee of D!'s against the canvas. Ravager grabs D!'s foot...what's this? Hooked around Ravager's calf, INDIAN DEATH LOCK! Ravager falls back, driving the pain into D!'s knee and leg! Up, Ravager drops back again for added pain! D! grabs the ropes quickly, and Kiebiech calls for a break. Ravager looks at Kiebiech, and...DROPS back one more time for good measure, breaking the hold before the five count. Kiebiech is livid and tells Ravager not to test him, but Ravager stands his ground, reminding Kiebiech that it's No DQ. Unbelievably, the crowd cheers that...wait a minute! D! has pulled himself to his feet, limping slightly, but he spins around Ravager! DDT! BOOOOOOO! D! covers, Ravager kicks out at an early two. D! to his feet first, waiting for Ravager, hook into a suplex --- SLINGSHOT suplex! Shades of Tully Blanchard, now that's OLD SCHOOL! D! covers again, one, two, kick out! Again, a huge mixed reaction for a cover by the champion. D! looks at the crowd, clearly wondering what the hell is going on. He grabs Ravager by the slick black hair and pulls him up. Irish whip sends Ravager in, D! going for a back body drop, Ravager leapfrogs and hits the opposite ropes, D! switches to a right thrust kick on the way back--- Ravager catches the leg, sweeps the left leg out from under D! and drops an elbow on that right knee! D! howls in pain as Ravager begins to twist it, but he's in a position where D! can wrab an arm around Ravager's own face and begin to pull back. Ravager throws an elbow into D!'s face and rolls to the outside.

JACK JONES: Hey, just a reminder, it's no disqualification! EVERYTHING is legal!

BILL HEWSON: Oh my God, Ravager has dragged D! over to the ring post! The champ's in the ring OH MY! Ravager just whipped D!'s injured right knee against the ring post!

Ravager has D!'s leg again, and for just a moment, looks out at the crowd with just a hint of a grin as the crowd actually seems INTO this. Ravager grabs D!'s leg, hooks it... AND APPLIES THE RING POST FIGURE FOUR! And the crowd goes BANANA.

JACK JONES: Look at that! A move invented by THE HITMAN HART, and now the NEXT exellence of execution doing exactly that! Excellently...executed!

BILL HEWSON: And it's no DQ! In any ordinary match Ravager would have to break this hold or risk being disqualified, but D! is in danger of submitting and losing his belt right here!

D! screaming in pain, because dammit, HIS LEG. Ravager holding on with everything he's got as Kiebiech has no choice but to ask D! if he submits! D! shaking his head, he won't tap out. He's reaching up, trying to grab the top ropes and pull up. More pain on himself but making it more difficult for Ravager to keep such a difficult hold applied! And finally, at last, Ravager lets go and drops down to the outside. Ravager momentarily dazed, regaining his bearings after having all the blood rush to his head. D! crawls away from the corner, trying to regain his feet in the center of the ring. Ravager, on the outside, looks over at a steel chair briefly... decides against it and rolls back in the ring. D! is getting to his feet, using the ropes, and here comes Ravager! D! fires off a knife-edge to Ravager's bare chest, which gets WHOOOO...then BOOOOO. Another chop, same reaction. There's mustard on those chops! D! chops away, trying to get momentum on his side! He's getting fired up! Limping, he rushes the ropes and bounces off for a huge clothesline! Ravager gets turned inside out, and D! yells to the crowd. Not the reaction he was hoping for, as the "D!/SUCKS!" dueling chants pick up again. D! goes back to the rising Ravager, and catches his man with a big roundhouse punch that drops Ravager in one hit. D! covers, ONE, TWO --- TWO. D! trying to shake off the pain in his right knee, he grabs Ravager's right arm--- turns Ravager over holding on, grabs the leg...IT'S PLEASANT CYCLING (with you)! D! has the hold applied and is cinching back, back, he's determined to make Ravager submit! Ravager in a world of trouble here!

BILL HEWSON: And now the tide has turned for the champion!

JACK JONES: Ravager's in trouble here, Bill Hewson --- the Tequila Sunrise, Pleasant Cycling, whatever you want is a hell of a difficult move to get out of or counter!

Unmentioned by the commentators is the fact that the majority of the crowd is booing the living hell out of D!. That fact seems to make D! cinch back harder. Ravager, using his free left hand and leg starting to crawl, trying to make it to the ropes. He reaches...REACHES...REAAAAAACHES...makes it! D! breaks the hold immediately and drives the point of his elbow right on the back of Ravager's neck! D! hooks the arm and again goes for Pleasant Cycling, but Ravager manages to get a hand on D!'s injured right knee! Ravager and D! struggling over the leverage, Ravager turns it around INTO AN ANKLE LOCK! D! IS IN TROUBLE HERE --- NO! He rolls over and managed to pull Ravager in with the held leg and KICK RAVAGER IN THE FACE with his free leg! Ravager momentarily stunned, and D! manages to get back to his feet. TOE KICK! ROCKETTES KICK OF DOOM! BOOOOOOOOOOOOO! And Ravager catches the foot! He goes to sweep D!'s left leg out from under him, as he did last week and once already in this match, but D! is prepared for that exact counter and hits a reverse enziguri! Ravager stumbls back into the corner, D! charges up, grimacing from the pain in his leg...STINGER SPLASH! NOBODY HOME! Ravager swings around behind D!, locks in the full-nelson, DRAGON SUPLEX---D! fights out! ...DRAGON SUPLEX BY D! ON! RAVAGER! And there's a cover! ONE! TWO! Th---Ravager kicks out in the nick of time! D! ... pulls the straps down? Well, he just ripped off his t-shirt and threw it out of the ring, and then ...actually made the motion that he pulled his straps down. He gets into POSITION! He's CALLING Ravager to get up "How'd that feel, you son of a bitch?! I bet Tiffany liked it! GET UP! GET UP!" Ravager, dazed, staggers to his feet... BEAT! O! BARRAGE! ...RAVAGER GETS OUT OF THE RING.

BILL HEWSON: Ravager with either a wise or cowardly move there, immediately throwing himself through the ropes to avoid the Beat-O-Barrage! When the champion is fired up, you don't want to be in the same ring as him!

JACK JONES: I don't know if these fans want to be in the same building as him!

D! finally snaps, yelling at the crowd "YOU CHEER *THAT?*" And they do. Or boo him. Whatever happens. Ravager looks on and D! abruptly launches himself over the top rope, catching Ravager in the mouth with a forearm! D! has Ravager against the guardrail, throwing forearms right into the mush! Ravager takes over with a gouge to the eye, which garners him cheers, and then he irish whips D! into the guardrail! Charge, Ravager meets boot! D! grabs Ravager, sends him face-first into the ring post---Ravager blocks! Elbow to D!'s gut, Ravager hooks D! up and...SUPLEX! OH MY GOD! RELEASE FISHERMAN's SUPLEX THROUGH THE TIMEKEEPER'S TABLE AGAINST THE RING! IT COLLAPSES! D! IS LYING IN PIECES, and the crowd is chanting HOLY SHIT, HOLY SHIT! Ravager collapses against the guardrail, breathing heavily. Kiebiech is helpless, he can't count them out or disqualify Ravager, he can only tell Ravager "Get it in the ring, Ravager!" Ravager regains his breath and then goes to D!. He picks up the out-of-it champion and rolls him in the ring. And...spies the timekeeper holding the NAPW Championship belt. Ravager grabs it from the timekeeper and rolls back in the ring. He looks into it, then readies it to smash D!, who is somehow starting to pull himself up by the ropes! Ravager has the belt ready, the crowd ... ACTUALLY WANTS TO SEE HIM PASTE D!. D! slowly getting up...

BILL HEWSON: Wait a minute...who's that running into the ring --- OH MY GOD! IT'S TIFFANY MACINTYRE!

JACK JONES: She must be a cheerleader, because you need to be pretty damn dense to get inbetween these two men!

TIFFANY runs into the ring, wearing a neck brace! She gets between Ravager and D!, and begins pleading with Ravager! "NOT LIKE THIS! You don't need to win it like this, PLEASE RAVAGER!" Ravager threatens to hit HER with the belt, yelling to get out of the way! Tiffany won't move, pleading, and D! is up! D! sees Tiffany in the ring and IMMEDIATELY wraps his arms around her, spins her around and sends her half-way out of the ring "LEAVE, TIFFANY. YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT HE'LL DO!" D! turns around, daring Ravager to bring the belt at him ---

BILL HEWSON: Thank God D! rose! The champion facing down the challenger, Ravager with the title belt WHAT THE HELL?

JACK JONES: Oh my... I don't believe it! HA!

BILL HEWSON: TIFFANY MACINTYRE JUST LOW BLOWED D! FROM BEHIND! TIFFANY HAS LOW BLOWED THE CHAMPION! NO! DRAGON SUPLEX! NOT LIKE THIS! ONE! TWO! TH----D! KICKED OUT! D! KICKED OUT!

And now the crowd is uncomfortable, still booing D!'s kick-out but clearly shocked and confused by Tiffany Macintyre! BUT D!! HAS! KICKED OUT OF THE DRAGON SUPLEX! THE CHAMPION STILL HAS GAS LEFT IN THE TANK! Ravager swears and yanks D! up roughly by the hair...WAITAMINUTE. TIFFANY HAS PUT THE NAPW TITLE BELT ON THE TOP TURNBUCKLE. Ravager hoists D! up and follows, Tiffany holding the belt in place. Ravager---no nonsense---no TIME WASTED --- HITS THE SUPERBRAINBUSTER ON THE TITLE BELT! GOOD LORD! D! may have a broken neck! And now Ravager COVERS... THE CROWD COUNTING ALONG! ONE! TWOOOOOO! ... ... ... THREEEEEEEEEE!

FRANK WARBURTON: Here is your winner...and NEWWWWWW NAPW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION! RAAAAAVAGGGGEERRRRR!

BILL HEWSON: GOOD LORD! WE HAVE A NEW CHAMPION! BUT WHAT A WAY TO DO IT! WHAT THE HELL! TIFFANY MACINTYRE WAS...NEARLY HAD HER NECK BROKEN LAST WEEK BY RAVAGER! WHY?! WHY?! JACK JONES: Easy, Hewson, you're going to have a freaking heart attack! This crowd is split down the middle. What the hell, are we in TORONTO tonight or something? BILL HEWSON: And that...Ravager has got a microphone! D! is laying motionless in the ring! I have no idea what to make of ANY OF THIS!

Tiffany, with a HUGE smile on her face, is applauding Ravager. Ravager grabs a microphone and looks across the ring at the fallen D!, holding his neck.

RAVAGER: D!... You see what happens when people back me into a corner? You forced me to make a profitable alliance, with someone else who isn't being fully appreciated. You humiliate me. You SLANDER me. You try to hurt me, you sanctimonious SON OF A BITCH. Well guess what, D!? All your past sins are coming back to haunt you now. Consider this... some Instant Karma!

Ravager throws the microphone down resulting in feedback before the mic gets shut-off. Ravager and Tiffany leave the ring, where D! is just now coming to, holding his neck in his hands. Ravager & Tiffany pause before the aisle, as Tiffany raises Ravager's hand in victory, Ravager holding the NAPW title belt in the other hand. The crowd is half-cheering, half-booing. And THAT.

Is Monday Night Fights. Lights down