MONDAY. NIGHT. FIGHTS.04/24/2006
"Let's get this over with! And over 1000 fans have jampacked the downtown Vancouver club THE RAGE, the unusual venue for NAPW Monday Night Fights! Folks are up on the second level, around the ring in the midst of the club, as the camera cuts to Bill Hewson & Jack "Attack " Jones at the announce location! BILL HEWSON: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to New Alberta Pro Wrestling, LIVE for the first-time ever from beautiful VANCOUVER, BRITISH COLUMBIA! I'm Bill Hewson alongside the legendary Jack "Attack" Jones, a man who is all too familiar with the West Coast! JACK JONES: Bill Hewson, it was a gorgeous day outside, and tonight, Jack Jones makes his return to Vancouver. I held the West Coast Champion for more years than you've got kids, Bill, and you're Catholic! BILL HEWSON: ...two minutes in, and I get this. Will you be serious? JACK JONES: Sure, I'll be serious! Because it's a serious night for the NAPW, the night where DEVASTATION gets his shot at Rex Caliber's Heavyweight Title! And brother, it could very well be the night where Devastation wins that very same title belt. Rex Caliber is still injured, not to mention probably drunk as a skunk. BILL HEWSON: Devastation & The Charitable Trust, of course, having embarked on a campaign to ruin Rex's reputation with the fans. We'll find out tonight if it worked. Also on the card tonight, a match that is not for the weak at heart or young. The Doomriders at long last will settle their differences in a sure to be violent, bloody TaiPei Deathmatch. Jack Attack, drop some science on us. JACK JONES: I've never wrestled in a TaiPei Deathmatch, and here's why: Both men will tape their wrists up, sticky side out, and then proceed to...well... roll those fists and forearms in broken glass. Using those deadly fists on the other man is perfectly legal! And to top it all off, those crazy bastards are replacing the ring ropes with barbed wire! BILL HEWSON: Put the kids to bed, for that one, but right now NAPW is proud to present the complete opposite of a Deathmatch, with a Pure Honor division contest! And the crowd's rowdy noise is stopped for a second by the strains of the Mexican National Anthem. The crowd cheers as the Mexican Sensation El Mentiroso makes his entrance with the lovely Senorita Suerte by his side. El Mentiroso waves the Mexican flag proudly as he takes the ring. He lays the Mexican flag across one corner, then proceeds to stretch as he awaits his opponent. "WOOOO-HOOO!" And to the high-energy "Song 2", Diamond sprints to the ring. He slides in to a good pop, hitting the ropes before taking his corner. Frank Warburton is set to make the introductions. FRANK WARBURTON: The following PURE HONOR divison contest is set for one fall, and is a Kiniski Cup Round Robin match-up! Introducing first to my left, accompanied to the ring by the lovely Senorita Seurte... Hailing from Mexico City at six-foot two inches and two-hundred and twenty pounds... He is the Mexican Sensation, ELLLLL MENTIROSSSSSOOOOO! (crowd applauds) And his opponent, to my right! Hailing from Edmonton, Alberta, he weighs in at one-hundred fifty-three pounds and stands at four-foot eleven inches! He is... THE DECAPITATORRRR... DIIIIIIAMONNNNNND! BILL HEWSON: What can we expect from this contest, Jack Jones? JACK JONES: I don't think NAPW's ever seen a truer lucha-libre contest than we're about to see right here, Bill Hewson. El Mentiroso is Mexico born and raised, he respects the traditions of Lucha Libre and has brought them to NAPW. Diamond may be Alberta raised, but he's dedicated himself to the lucha style. It's going to be quickness and non-stop action between these two! The bell sounds! Diamond and El Mentiroso shake hands, then lock up in the center of the ring. Mentiroso gains the height advantage and throws Diamond off the ropes. Mentiroso ducks. As Diamind comes back, he spins and flips backwards over Mentiroso's back, then dropkicks him in the spine. BILL HEWSON: What a move by Diamond to gain the advantage! JACK JONES: I don't know if I like either man but Diamond upended El Mentiroso on that exchange! El Mentiroso recovers on the ground. Diamond runs off the ropes and comes in with a pair of boots to chops of El Mentiroso. Diamond jumps onto the larger man and locks in a crossface. El Mentiroso immediately grabs the ropes. FRANK WARBURTON: El Mentiroso has used his first rope break! BILL HEWSON: That's one rope break for El Mentiroso. JACK JONES: Sometimes I wonder if they even read the rules. BILL HEWSON: Well Jack, the Pure Honour division isn't like any other in the world. It's a championship that requires strategy and knowing when to use your three rope breaks are an integral part of that strategy. Mentiroso just clobbered Diamond with a jumping lariat! In the ring Diamond had El Mentiroso back to his feet. Diamond threw Mentiroso off the ropes but he got caught by a jumping lariat that almost took Diamond's head off. Diamond lays on the mat, El Mentiroso runs off the ropes again he comes back with a SENTON splash. Diamond grabs his stomach in pain. El Mentiroso points to up top and the fans react wildly. BILL HEWSON: The Colors of Mexico are about to fly! El Mentiroso dives off with a diving headbutt, connecting with Diamonds forehead. Both men lay on the ground. The fans are cheering wildly. They've really started to get into Lucha style. JACK JONES: Do you know what that move is called in Mexico? The Whole Enchilada! BILL HEWSON: Will you stop? I think it's a variation of the "Tope" move which is a normal headbutt in Lucha Libre. JACK JONES: Tope, Enchilada --- same thing. BILL HEWSON: Respect one moment, complete jerkiness the next, that's our Jack Jones... El Mentiroso is the first man to his feet after that headbutt... El Mentiroso gets to his feet. Diamond is groggy but he's getting up as well. Diamond has to reposition his mask and in doing so creates an opportunity for El Mentiroso to strike with a vicious chop to the shoulder blades of Diamond. The smaller man doubles back a few feet onto to jump at El Mentiroso with a spinning enziguri. He catches him on target and Diamond rolls away only to come back with a standing 360 splash onto the chest of Mentiroso. The crowd loves it they start chanting "LuCha LiBre! CLAP-CLAP-CLAPCLAPCLAP!". Diamond jumps onto the top of El Mentiroso and hits him with a couple closed fists before he realizes what he's doing. The referee immediately breaks it up. FRANK WARBURTON: Diamond, for using two closed fists, has been charged with one rope break! BILL HEWSON: That too is illegal, fans. One closed fist strike results in a warning, any subsequent closed fists result in the removal of one of your rope breaks. So now both men have two rope breaks left before they are unable to break a hold by grabbing onto the ropes. JACK JONES: Diamond needs to watch his temper, Bill Hewson. Although... why is this the Kiniski Cup? You never saw Kiniski using planchas and flipping sentons. BILL HEWSON: Progress. Diamond moves the referee aside and as El Mentiroso gets up he delivers a SHINING WIZARD, connecting his shin square into the chin of El Mentiroso. Diamond goes for the cover! ONE! TWO! TH--- NO! Mentiroso kicks out. Diamond can't believe it and gets back to his feet. He grabs Mentiroso by the head and pulls him up as well. Diamond throws a few palm strikes but Mentiroso blocks one, grabbing his wrist and performs a Japanese arm drag, forcing Diamond into an arm lock. Diamond squirms trying to break the hold. He kicks his legs into the ropes and Mentiroso has to break the hold. FRANK WARBURTON: Diamond has used his second rope break! BILL HEWSON: Diamond better use his last rope break wisely, he's only got one left. JACK JONES: See how that can change pretty quickly? Mentiroso lost one first and now Diamond, with the closed fist and the rope break, now is at a disadvantage. BILL HEWSON: Standing four-eleven gives him the disadvantage on most nights. I think he's used to fighting his battles up hill anyway. KNEE DROP TO DIAMOND'S ARM! Mentiroso, back to his feet, starts to go to work on the now tender arm of Diamond. He grabs it again, this time applying pressure to the shoulder area. The fans are chanting Diamond's name, trying to give him momentum. Diamond starts to get to his knees, arm wrench still applied. Mentiroso elbows him in the back of the head, but Diamond is a man possessed and gets to his feet anyway. Diamond throws a palm strike, and another and another. Mentiroso releases the hold. Diamond runs off, bounces off the ropes. Mentiroso leans into the ropes. Diamond runs back and does a jumping cross body which has enough momentum to send both men packing to the outside. JACK JONES: STREET FIGHT! BILL HEWSON: Both men are on the outside on the ring now! Diamond is moving first! JACK JONES: It's about time that outside referee got some action. Diamond jumps back up onto the ring apron and into the ring which breaks up the refereeÕs count. He gets back into the ring. Mentiroso is getting up on the outside. Diamond runs off the ropes and comes back... FLIPPING PLANCHA! But Mentiroso was prepared! Mentiroso jumped up and dropkicked Diamond as he was coming down on him! Both men are down! BILL HEWSON: MENTIROSO JUST SACRIFICED HIS OWN BODY TO TAKE OUT DIAMOND! JACK JONES: Even I have to say... WHAT A MOVE! The referee begins his count at one. El Mentiroso starts to move first. At the six count, Mentiroso gets to his feet and drags Diamond back up. He rolls Diamond into the ring and jumps up onto the ring apron. Mentiroso goes up to the top ropes. He jumps off... TUMBLEWEED! A massive flipping splash right into a pinning position...ONE...TWO... NO! DIAMOND KICKS OUT! BILL HEWSON: Both men have had close falls, but neither man wants to remain down. JACK JONES: Unbelievable display. BILL HEWSON: It must be good if you're willing to say that. Mentiroso goes back up to the second rope. He waits for Diamond to get to his feet. Diamond does so, groggy. Mentiroso jumps off and swings with a spinning DDT... but Diamond follows through with the motion onto the fall backwards, giving Mentiroso an unorthodox suplex! Diamond rolls on top...ONE...TWO... NO! Mentiroso grabs the bottom rope to break up the count! FRANK WARBURTON: El Mentiroso has used his second rope break! Diamond knees El Mentiroso, blocked! Mentiroso headbutts and Diamond stumbles backwards, Mentiroso runs at him, Diamond vaults him up in the air... Out of NOWHERE El Mentiroso catches Diamond in a huracanrana! Into the pin! ONE! TWO! Diamond with another kick out. Mentiroso gets back to his feet, not letting the kick outs bother him. He picks Diamond up onto to be hit with a FACEBUSTER lightning fast knocking both men onto the canvas. BILL HEWSON: The athleticism and agility of these two men is amazing! Just as Mentiroso lifted up Diamond, Diamond - like greased lighting - nailed a facebuster onto the unsuspecting Mentiroso! Diamond gets up and jumps onto the back of Mentiroso... STF! Diamond locks in Mentiroso's head and left foot and wrenches backwards. Mentiroso is reaching for the ropes but is a little to far away. Diamond keeps the hold locked on. The referee is asking Mentiroso if he gives up... he says no and the hold continues. Diamond is rocking his head back and forth trying to get all the strength he can muster into the hold. Mentiroso uses his body and flapjacks a bit towards the ropes... he reaches it and the hold must be broken. FRANK WARBURTON: El Mentiroso has used his FINAL rope break! BILL HEWSON: That's his last rope break! Mentiroso can no longer get out of submission holds with the ropes. JACK JONES: That's a bad situation to be in, Bill Hewson. Diamond gets to his feet. The crowd is really behind both men. Mentiroso gets back to his feet slowly. He backs into the corner. Diamond runs at him, Mentiroso steps out a few feet. Diamond jumps up for a drop kick but Mentiroso catches the legs. Diamond drops the ground as Mentiroso holds his ankles. Mentiroso leans back, pole-vaulting Diamond into the turnbuckle! Diamond hits the mat in his back. Mentiroso jumps up top... BILL HEWSON: What is he going for?! El Mentiroso jumps off... EL MENTIRA GRANDE! Mentiroso goes for the cover! ONE! TWO! THREE! FRANK WARBUTON: THE WINNER OF FIRST ROUND ROBIN IN THE KINISKI CUP... ELLLLLL MENNNNTIROOOOSOOOOOO! The crowd explodes at the hot finish to the match-up, as El Mentiroso pounds the mat in exultation. he stands to his feet, arms high, and then turns around to shake hands with a disappointed, but exhilirated Diamond. Mentiroso raises Diamond's arm high in the air --- BILL HEWSON: Wait a minute, that's... The Syndicate's music! Korn's "Here To Stay" plays, interrupting El Mentiroso's music. Out walk "The Prototype" Ryan Pibb, Jon Tees, and "Renegade" Rick Tees to a chorus of boos. Rick Tees just spews venom at the crowd. El Mentiroso & Diamond both ready in the ring, but Ryan Pibb pulls out a microphone. RYAN PIBB: Oh, ease up kids, we're not going to rush you. So, El Mentiroso, you fluked out last Thursday, and tonight you take a Pure Honor win. You and I... were already scheduled to hook up at Complete Control in this Round Robin, Mentiroso --- or maybe I should say, you were already scheduled to LOSE to a WRESTLING GOD at Complete Control. But now you and I both have one win in this Round Robin! Which makes our match at Complete Control.... Pibb pauses, as the crowd rises up in a chant of "RICK TEES SUCKS! RICK TEES SUCKS!" Pibb snarls at the microphone. RYAN PIBB: Rick Tees is three times the man any of you are! Ladies, you know it's true! Now shut up and listen! You've got just one week to prepare for the beating of your lifetime, El Mentiroso! When you step into the ring with a wrestling God, you leave...humbled. And after I'm done with you and take that Kiniski Cup, if you don't quit the business, my good friend Rick Tees wants you one more time in that ring, and this time --- he won't go 'easy on you.' Now hit---OUR---MUSIC! The Syndicate looks over the crowd as Korn starts back up. In the ring, Diamond and El Mentiroso shake hands again, bonded through an amazing lucha libre experience. JACK JONES: El Mentiroso's in for quite the challenge at Complete Control. BILL HEWSON: Unfortunately for Diamond, as he was unable to score a win over either El Mentiroso or Ryan Pibb, but that does mean that at Complete Control, El Mentiroso and Ryan Pibb will meet to determine the first Pure Honor Champion! We've got a commercial break to take, don't go away!
BILL HEWSON: Well, well, look who's coming out to the ring here. JACK JONES: Show some respect for the uncrowned Heavyweight Champion of NAPW, Bill Hewson! He's got the belt to prove it! BILL HEWSON: He STOLE the belt from Rex Caliber over the weekend! That doesn't make him champion of anything! Joey Malone gets in the ring to a chorus of boos and some laughter, as he's wearing an over-sized trenchcoat. He steps in the middle of the ring and apparently flashes the crowd. But, no, he's showing off the NAPW Heavyweight Title --- with Rex Caliber's name on it --- to the crowd! Joey Malone asks for the microphone. "BAD BOY" JOEY MALONE: Now NAPW, I want you all to --- "MORE HUMAN THAN HUMAN! MORE HUMAN THAN HUMAN!" BILL HEWSON: THE CHAMP IS HERE! You ain't heard nothing til you hear a REX CALIBER pop, baby! Caliber storms out from the entrance as Joey Malone visibly blanches. He stalks to the ring, ribs still taped up underneath his "CRIMES" t-shirt. He gets in the ring and hits the corner to the POP... and then turns around to Joey. Rex extends his hand out to Joey Malone, demanding the mic. A visibly shaking Joey Malone hands it over. BILL HEWSON: The REAL champion apparently has a few words to say, Jack Jones. This crowd is quieting down to hear them... Rex looks over to the right, then the left. REX CALIBER: Joey, you dumb son of a bitch! You know what happens to mother(BLEEP)ers that (BLEEP) with THE CRIMES? Joey shakes his head, clearly mouthing no. Rex Caliber takes one look at him, unfocused eyes wild. REX CALIBER: A little somethin' me and THE STATIC like to call "OPERATION KILL MOTHER(BLEEP)ERS DEAD!" BAM ---! BILL HEWSON: Rex Caliber just smashed the microphone over Joey's head! JACK JONES: These horrible Vancouver fans, they're actually...cheering this! BILL HEWSON: ...Joey stole the man's belt! THREE TIMES! THE CHAMPION HAS JOEY MALONE UP... TOTAL ANNIHILATION! JACK JONES: Oh, the HUMANITY! Joey flops like a dead fish on the canvas as Rex Caliber grabs the now-fallen Heavyweight Title belt. He poses with his belt, then goes to leave the ring... but stops halfway through the ropes. He withdraws, looking over Joey Malone one more time. Joey is crawling to his feet by the ropes. Rex looks over the crowd with a goofy grin on his face, and the crowd chants '"MAKE HIM TAP! MAKE HIM TAP!" Caliber stalks Joey and SLAPS him into the Rings of Rex! Joey Malone frantically taps out as Rex leeeaaaans back on the hold. Finally, Rex releases it, leaving Joey Malone whimpering in the ring. And then Rex Caliber... makes an exit THROUGH the crowd, celebrating with his Freaks of Nature! BILL HEWSON: Joey Malone just learned a very painful lesson about respecting other people's property. When we come back... Evan Cartwright will be in the house! Stay tuned!
JACK JONES: Would you look at all that gold? Somebody really needs to relieve Evan Cartwright of the burden... BILL HEWSON: Evan Cartwright made NAPW history last week, becoming the first double-champion by regaining the Provincial Title from "The Lemondrop Kid" Lloyd Rees. He is one-half of the tag team champions, but as we all know, last week Chris Casino QUIT the NAPW. There's been much rumour and speculation as to the fate of the Tag Team Titles, and we're about to get some answers. Evan gets in the ring and takes a mic. The crowd is on their feet, chanting "CART-WRIGHT, CART-WRIGHT!" Evan shakes his head, then calls for quiet before speaking. EVAN CARTWRIGHT: As much as I appreciate the honor of making history and the reactions I am getting, this is a sad day, to say the least. My partner, Chris Casino, has deserted me, leaving me to fend for myself with so much gold to care for. Am I upset about it? Damn right I am. Do I harbor a grudge? It would be pointless to at this point. What's done is done, and Chris has other priorities at this time in his life. So be it, the river has lead me along this tributary and it seems I must go it alone for now. However, were I simply only the Provincial Champion, there would be no complication. However, I am also one half of the NAPW Tag Team Champions, and it would be rather greedy and foolhardy of me to try and defend these titles by myself against two men... or even two she-wolves like the Celtic Assassins. Handicap matches are no fun for the handicapped, so you can understand why I would not care to experience that every time I am to defend the titles. But it's not just a matter of me being greedy. No, it's a matter of placing my trust in another and epitomizing the meaning of tag team champions. A tandem bike requires two riders to run at maximum efficiency, and the tag team champions should never run below such a level of maximum efficiency. Evan paces methodically around the ring. A sign in the audience reads "Show Us Your Black Mamba, Evan!" while another reads "White Gold is Fools Gold!" and yet another reads "Predator is my Daddy!" EVAN CARTWRIGHT: So in short, I have decided to move on and find a new partner. But the question remains, who in NAPW is worthy of being handed a championship title? Names like Don Travelli, Krusty Kid Paul, Stein, El Mentiroso, and others were thrown about, but ultimately, I had little say in the matter other than my own personal opinion. However, I was surprised by the choice presented to me as the rank contender. I was somewhat shocked yet intrigued at first, and then I came to realize the validity of this choice--- it just felt like it would work. The perfect mixture of volatile chemical solutions. Since I'm sure you're all waiting to find out who it is... let the suspense entrap you no longer! Please welcome, the newest half of the NAPW Tag Team Champions... "Fighting 59" hits the area speakers and the crowd begins to boo instantly. "The Lemondrop Kid" Lloyd Rees walks out onto the ramp, 'Republic of Newfoundland' title over his shoulder and a microphone in his hand. The blood that once discolored the belt is all gone. The RoN title belt shines like a diamond. BILL HEWSON: It can't be! Why on God's green earth, would Evan Cartwright hand one half of the tag titles to this man? JACK JONES: Best choice he and the NAPW brass could have made if you ask me. BILL HEWSON: There has to be another explanation for this appearance by the former Provincial Champion. Lloyd motions for the music to stop, brings the microphone to his mouth, and starts to speak. "THE LEMONDROP KID" LLOYD REES: Now all ye west coasters can calm right down. Even though da smartest ting that Mr. Cartwright could have done was pick da Republic of Newfoundland Champion fer his partner, dat is not why I'm here... The crowd continues to boo the ~nFa~ front man and Evan looks none to impressed that he has been interrupted by Lloyd. "THE LEMONDROP KID" LLOYD REES: Evan, after yer Broke Back Mountain bubby, Chris Casino, left you high and dry you should have been stripped of them there tag titles. Together ye guys were a joke, alone?! Don't even get me started. There is a perfectly deserve'n team fer those belts, and if I had anyting t'do with da decision make'n around here, the Celtic Assassins would be hold'n those belts as we speak. But, I didn't come out here t'talk about the NAPW Tag Title, hell no... The crowd is getting more and more pissed off as Lloyd speaks. Cups and paper fly in ever direction. Evan has a, get to the point look, on his face. "THE LEMONDROP KID" LLOYD REES: {talking to the crowd} Have a little respect fer da Republic of Newfoundland champion! {back to Evan} I'm here t'talk about dis... Lloyd holds the Republic of Newfoundland title high in the air. "THE LEMONDROP KID" LLOYD REES: With Don Travelli's help, on the 17th of April, ya took what belong'd t'me, and I'm ready t'take it back. Yer time of be'n da first ever, and only, dual champion in NAPW history, is go'n t'come to a screech'n halt... Ya see, dis title {points to the RoH title} is da one and only belts dat represents da so called, NAPW Provincial Title division. So, I've talk'd t'da Larrys upstairs, in da NAPW Championship committee, and dis is what we came up with... At Complete Control, after yer finish'd lose'n yer tag titles, with yer new partner, t'da Celts, yer go'n t'step into da ring with me... EVAN CARTWRIGHT: Double duty, eh? I suppose that comes with being a double champion and all. You, sir, are on. By the time I'm through with you, you'll be a gelatinous, bloody pulp of quivering mass for the War Games match you have later that evening. But you want to end this madness once and for all and settle all scores? So be it. But I have to wonder, what trick do you propose for this match? I suppose you have a gimmick you'd like to tag onto the match to give it your particular stench of cod and vinegar. "THE LEMONDROP KID" LLOYD REES: Hardly, b'y. We're go'n t'have ourselves a little Ladder Unification Match. Both da useless NAPW Provincial Title, and da prestigious Republic of Newfoundland Title will be hang'n high above da ring. Da only way t'win dis match is t'climb a fifteen foot ladder and grabs both da belts. So, once I beat yer ass, climb t'da top of da ladder and grab both belts, da NAPW will finally have a champion and a title belt dat they can be proud of...me! "The East Coast Sensation", "The Republic of Newfoundland Champion", "The Lemondrop Kid" Lloyd Rees! EVAN CARTWRIGHT: Don't you ever get tired of hearing yourself, Rees? I know for a fact that myself and these people are sick of hearing your vile bellow, so quit singing it and bring it, you painted hussy! "THE LEMONDROP KID" LLOYD REES: Ya know what Evan, I don't tink that I am go'n to way til May first t'get me hands on ya... Lloyd motions to the back. Bayman Jakey and Celtic Assassins walk out on the ramp and the ~nFa~ hits the ring. Evan smashes Jakey with a forearm, nails O'Brady, but the numbers catch up to him as Thoes cracks him in the back of the head! The NFA swarm Cartwright, putting the boots to himyet again. Is there no justice in the world? There is now if justice is embodied in the form of SICK BILLY KRYENIK! JACK JONES: What is he doing here?! He's fighting Deathrow later tonight! BILL HEWSON: Billy Kryenik to the rescue! JACK JONES: You don't think... no way, not him! Billy is a house being engulfed by an inferno, taking out both Celtic Assassins with a double clothesline. Bayman Jakey charges and gets hurled by his own momentum to the outside thanks to the guiding hand of Billy. Lloyd nails him in the back of the head with a clubbing blow and prepares to whip his man into the ropes. Billy counters and lifts his man up like he's ready to flapjack him. Evan Cartwright is already up and already has good chemistry and timing to go along with Billy's idea. Evan executes the high diamond cutter on the falling Rees and it's the 3-D, Cartwright and Kryenik style! Rees' body jumps with the impact and he rolls out of the ring, landing next to Bayman Jakey. Inside the ring, Billy and Evan time it perfectly and execute tandem superkicks to the Celtic Assassins, sending the challengers to the tag titles reeling outside next to their stable mates. Billy climbs the turnbuckle and roars for the screaming fans as Evan takes the mic up once again. EVAN CARTWRIGHT: As if I needed to tell you... my new tag team partner... "SICK" BILLY KRYYYYYYYYYYYYENIKKKKKK! "Celestial" by Isis hits and the newest tag team in NAPW stand tall while the NFA is once again finding themselves facing another setback. The Celtic Assassins sneer at the champions and make the title sign around their waists. Rees does the same regarding his Provincial title. Evan motions for them to bring it, with a smile of cocky confidence that Chris Casino would be proud of. "Sick" Billy raises his title high overhead and shows his tongue piercing to the nearby hotties at ringside. BILL HEWSON: My God! On the same night he will wrestle Tommy Deathrow in a TaiPei Deathmatch... Sick Billy Kryenik has become one-half of the tag team champions! Evan Cartwright and Kryenik, that is one hell of a team! JACK JONES: It's a travesty of justice is what it is, Bill Hewson, and in one week Evan Cartwright can kiss all that gold good-bye! Kryenik isn't going to be in any kind of shape to help him defend the tag belts after Deathrow gets through with him tonight... BILL HEWSON: What a shocker here tonight! We'll be right back!
JACK JONES: Absolutely, Hewson! These Vancouver fans have been so amped up, so off-the-charts phenomenal, you'd think we were in a REAL Wrestling Province like ALBERTA, or even ONTARIO. BILL HEWSON: Well, whatever your tastes may be, NAPW is rocking the house on all stops to Seattle and COMPLETE CONTROL. And it was during some other BC house shows that the bad blood between Predator and the New and Improved D-X has gone from bad to WORSE. JACK JONES: Yeah, get ready to take some notes at home... Saturday in Kamloops, Predator fought both men to a draw, and they needed security to pull old Tin Face off of Stylin' Kyle... and just YESTERDAY, in Kelowna, Predator AMBUSHED D-X after a brutal tag team contest. Predator REALLY hates D-X! BILL HEWSON: Well, D-X has made no bones about disliking Predator when the camera's been turned on them, either. Now let's get ready to see if they can settle their differences RIGHT HERE, IN VANCOUVER. The Foo Fighters rock the Vancouver crowd from side to side with "Low"--FOUR MEN come out, and they're here for TROUBLE. The first man struts out with green tights and a sneer on his puss as he gazes straight at the ring, shutting out the hostile Vancouver fans. The second man is cloaked with his leather duster and black cowboy hat, grim determination showing. The third man is dressed to the nines in Armani, and seemingly wrapping up a call on his cell. The fourth one is noticeably smaller than the rest, but carries himself like he's the biggest, baddest one in his "Stylin' Kyle is My Favourite Wrestler" T-shirt and big yellow rape whistle. FRANK WARBURTON: The following contest is a two-on-one HANDICAP MATCH and it is scheduled for ONE FALL. Making their way to the ring, and accompanied by their manager, "The Mayor" Bill Fleming, and their LEGAL COUNSEL, Ryan Kingston, weighing in at a combined weight of FIVE-HUNDRED, TWENTY-SEVEN POUNDS, representing ST. ALBERT, ALBERTA and MOOSE JAW, SASKATCHEWAN... they are THREE-TIME, FORMER TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS... BRUCE "THE BEAST" RICHARDS! STYLIN' KYLE ROBERTS! THE NEEEEEEEEW! AND IMPROOOOOOOOVED! DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-ECKS! The Mayor is ECSTATIC to hop on the ring apron and hold the ropes open for his new clients. Which just mean that Richards and Roberts slide into the ring. Fleming recovers quickly and hollers "Yeah! D-X!", then pops into the ring to discuss strategy with his clients. The lights go dark, and Criss Angel's "Scarecrow" is taking form--Predator's entrance depends on just the right build-up, just the right moment--BAM! The lights are on... and no one's home. JACK JONES: Where's Predator? BILL HEWSON: HE'S IN THE RING! Sure enough, D-X turns around, stunned, to find their opponent standing tall in the center of the ring. With a terrified look on his face, Warburton goes to work-- FRANK WARBURTON: PARTS UNKNOWN. THREE-HUNDRED-SOMETHING. PREDATOR. --and rolls out of the ring just as the bell chimes. SPEARSPEARSPEAR!!! Predator kills Bill Fleming DEAD with a thunderous SPEAR. D-X goes into action--they were too shocked to do anything! It's D-X with the double clothesline--Predator DUCKS underneath it and rebounds off the ropes with a twin clothesline--DOUBLE WHAMMY! D-X gets pasted on that one. Predator sends a soccer kick into Stylin' Kyle's ribs, then quickly picks The Beast up to standing and Irish Whips him into the ropes--and on the rebound, it's a huge BACK BODY DROP to send Beast flailing to the mat. Stylin' Kyle's picked himself up, but Predator's ready for him--another Irish Whip, this time into the corner--a big SPLASH into his opponent's body! Stylin' Kyle stumbles out of the corner, hurt--Predator takes his place in the corner and climbs up to the second rope--BULLDOG! Predator's standing in the ring with three downed men, and he's ROARING A WARRIOR CRY! JACK JONES: What GIVES? That's not the local job squad you're fighting in there, Predator--that's D-X! And they're BETTER THAN YOU. BILL HEWSON: They might have been in the past, partner--but Predator might have LEARNED how to BEAT THEM... HEY! JACK JONES: Ha! That's right! The Beast is stirring! You'll need more than a couple of big moves to take him out! The Beast has, indeed, recovered right under Predator's nose, and he's rolling out of the ring, pulling Fleming out by the ankles to the outside. As Predator goes to stop them, Ryan Kingston nabs Stylin' Kyle's elbow and pulls HIM out. Referee Morgan Smythe sees all of D-X recuperating on the outside, then points at Bruce Richards and orders him to STOP IT. Bruce catcalls her, so she starts a ten-count right then and there. "ONE!" Predator's getting impatient, and picks a free side of the ring. "TWO!" While Kingston starts gently slapping some feeling into Stylin' Kyle's cheek, Predator rolls out. "THREE!" Beast checks to see if Fleming's okay, and Fleming just responds by blowing into his whistle. "FOUR!" Predator's rounded the corner, and he's got Richards in his sights! "FIVE!" The Beast sees his opponent coming, and throws off his hat, starting to pull off his duster. "SIX!" Predator charges with the SPEARSPEARSPEAR, OLE! as Richards gets him to run through the coat and int! o the guardrail behind him. "SEVEN!" Richards jumps on the back of the downed Predator, and rips the mask off of his face. "EIGHT!" Grabbing his trusty leather coat, he slips it under Predator's chin and starts choking him out right there. "NINE!" Smythe is also yelling at him about the illegal choke, but right behind her, Stylin' Kyle has rolled in the ring. He gooses her from behind before she can do the final count. She's LIVID, but now someone's back in the ring, the count has stopped. Predator, purple-faced, is powering up from underneath the not-insubstantial Beast. Stylin' Kyle rolls back out as a new count starts--"ONE!"--but Predator sees him and starts advancing on him, seemingly content to tow Richards along with him. "TWO!" Roberts counters the encumbered Predator with a Drop Toe Hold, sending him crashing to the ringside concrete floor. With a big man on TOP of him. "THREE!" Richards finally disengages the coat, but with Predator lying crumpled at their feet, D-X sta! rt laying into him with stiff boot shots. "FOUR!" Predator EXPLODES to standing, taking D-X unaware. "FIVE!" He's got Roberts by the throat! He's got Richards by the throat! He's got BOTH MEN by the throat and the crowd is CHEERING, BIG TIME! "SIX!" He's lifting up BOTH MEN with either arm--he's getting them ready for a DOUBLE CHOKESLAM! "SEVEN!" WHAM! Stylin' Kyle's got his foot right in Predator's JUNK! Predator gasps and releases his grip on both of his opponents. "EIGHT!" D-X rocking the big man back-and-forth with punches. "NINE!" Stylin' Kyle quickly slides into the ring, winks at Smythe and points a "handgun snap" at her--that's the end of THAT count! Outside the ring, The Beast is rocking a dazed Predator with big rights. Stylin' Kyle slides back out and slips a full nelson hold on the woozy Predator, while Richards hits him with THE CLAW! Predator's thrashing in pain, but Stylin' Kyle's giving him nowhere to go! BILL HEWSON: This isn't Falls Count Anywhere! Predator can't submit on the outside! JACK JONES: Who said anything about making him submit? In the ring, Smythe's count is back up to "FOUR!" At ringside, and agonized Predator is desperately trying to power out of the full-nelson / Claw combo, to no avail. Kingston's crept close to the action, taking pictures of the fading Predator with his camera phone. And Bill Fleming's blowing his whisle right in Predator's ear, pulling it out and yelling obscenities at him. And that's all Smythe wants to see... fed up, she instead turns to the timekeeper and orders him to ring the bell. FRANK WARBURTON: Ladies and gentlemen, due to the referee's decision, this match has ended in a NO CONTEST! And THAT'S unpopular to the Vancouver fans, who are chanting "D! X! SUCKS!" as loud as they can. There's a spark of life left in Predator, but it's not getting any stronger due to the Beast's incessant Claw, Roberts' Full Nelson, or the humiliation at the hands of Fleming and Kingston... BILL HEWSON: HOLD THE PHONE! COMING FROM THE BACK! JACK JONES: WHAT THE HELL? BILL HEWSON: IT'S JASON! JASON IS RUNNING TO RINGSIDE! BUT WHAT DOES HE WANT? The first D-Xer to notice Jason is Kingston, who turns around just before Jason picks him up into a quick Torture Rack, then gives him a Death Valley Driver as if he were nothing! Wasting no time, he wraps his huge arms around the scrawny Mayor--squeezes--then spine-busts him to the floor! JACK JONES: BY GOD! CALL SECURITY! JASON HAS NO RIGHT TO BE HERE! BILL HEWSON: HE'S STACKING UP BODIES LIKE CORDWOOD--BUT WAIT! D-X HAS FINALLY LET GO OF PREDATOR! IT'S A FIGHT! D-X won't be taken as easy, though, as Beast goes straight to trading punches with the goalie-masked Jason, all the while Stylin' Kyle hops over the guard rail to nab a chair out from under a kid. Jason's surprised Beast with a MANDIBLE CLAW of his own, and he's LIFTING HIM WITH IT--CLANG! tylin' Kyle's on the warpath, and Jason's back took ALL of that solid steel chair! ...and he barely felt it --- CLANG! A second one stuns Jason just enough that he releases Richards. Jason's goozled, but he finds the presence of mind to stagger out of the way--SPEARSPEARSPEAR!!! Predator's ran through the path Jason cleared and SPEARS the CHAIR right into Stylin' Kyle Roberts! Jason with unbelievable strength has started pounding on The Beast! Predator's slipped behind Beast and sets him up for THE END--but now Stylin' Kyle's tagged Predator with an uppercut low blow! Jason pounces on Stylin' Kyle--he's going for the Crystal Claw! And now SECURITY is coming out in a horde! JACK JONES: That's THREE! Three times in a ROW that Predator and D-X have wound up in a bench-clearing brawl! But why the hell is JASON now in the mix? BILL HEWSON: We're gonna have to get our answers later, Jack Attack! Security's trying to break this brawl apart, but these Vancouver security guards have never tried to break an NAPW brawl apart... it's gonna TAKE a while! Folks, it's commercial time, don't touch that clicker, you might still be watching this when we get back! JACK JONES: STYLIN' KYLE! PUNCHING PREDATOR! IN THE ASS!
BILL HEWSON: The Rage is all for Ravager tonight! "Landmine Spring" by Quicksand gets a less pleased reaction than Ravager, but there is not a man who could care less than the one who comes out of the curtains next. Flanked by his mountainous bodyguards, Bunker and Stump, Pit Boss makes his way down to the ring oblivious to the boos from the packed house here tonight. Bunker and Stump get onto the apron long enough to hold the ropes apart for their employer to step into the ring. JACK JONES: There is a true hero, Hewson, a man who cares about giving back to the community! The bell rings as Pit Boss is still leaning over the top rope talking to Bunker and Stump, and that is enough for Ravager. Ravager delivers a thunderous double sledge across the back of Pit Boss' neck, bending him over double. Ravager begins raining down blows on the neck and back of his opponent. Ravager cinches in a front facelock with an arm hooked and delivers a series of three harsh knees to the ribs of Pit Boss. Ravager spins around and attempts to whip Pit Boss into the ropes, but the owner of the Gold Standard reverses and sends Ravager off. Ravager comes back with a big swinging clothesline that Pit Boss manages to duck under. Ravager puts on the brakes and spins back around right into a HUGE spinebuster! Pit Boss grabs the legs to finish the Pay-Out! This one could be over right here! Ravager struggles against the hold, fighting Pit Boss, not letting himself get turned over. Pit Boss is relentless, adjusting his grip to try to step over Ravager and deliver an elevated version of the cloverleaf, but Ravager continues to fight. Ravager bunches up his body and then kicks, dropping Pit Boss back to the mat. Ravager is up in a flash, taking the full mount and slamming Pit Boss with rights and lefts. Pit Boss covers up, then snaps both legs up behind Ravager to catch him arms and pull him down for a pin. Pit Boss has the legs as well as Henry Andrews drops to make the count. One. Two. Ravager rolls backwards out of the pin! Ravager grabs Pit Boss' legs and flips forward into a bridging pin of his own. One. Two! Thr-Pit Boss kicks out hard at the last second and the crowd groans. Both men roll to their feet to face each other Ð CRACK! - Pit Boss just slapped the taste right out of Ravager's mouth! Ravager stumbles back into the ropes, more in surprise than pain, and Pit Boss spits on the ground at his opponent's feet showing a complete lack of respect for the man. BILL HEWSON: A great exchange of wrestling prowess between these two men, right down the tubes with that distasteful display from Pit Boss. JACK JONES: The man is just flat out better than Ravager, and he needs to establish right away that he isn't going to stand for Ravager trying to roll around on the mat with him. That is just basic ring psycho-HEY! He can't do that! Ravager explodes off of the ropes and wipes the smile from Pit Boss' face with a titanic right hand. Pit Boss reels under the barrage of fists, trying in vain to cover up from the fury of Ravager. Andrews tries to warn Ravager about the closed fists, but this is anything but a Pure Honor match. Ravager has Pit Boss backed into the corner and CRACK! The sound of Ravager's hand slicing across the chest of Pit Boss echoes through the Vancouver nightclub. CRACK! Another chop has Pit Boss dancing out of the corner, but Ravager shoves him right back in to deliver a third earsplitting chop across his chest. Ravager continues his assault, alternating between forearm shivers to the side of the head and chops to the chest. Henry Andrews finally manages to get between the two, after timing it carefully so he wouldn't accidentally be on the receiving end of a furious chop. Pit Boss stumbles out as Ravager raises his hands to show that he is giving a clean break, and collapses to the mat, only to be pulled to the outside by Bunker and Stump. Pit Boss' chest looks like an Irishman's after a day at the beach without sunblock, and he tries to rub some of the sting out. Andrews begins the ten count, and Pit Boss lets it run until six before approaching the ring apron, yelling at Andrews to get Ravager away from the ropes. JACK JONES: Can you believe this? Pit Boss is trying to represent our company in honor even though this match hasn't technically been slated for the Pure Honor division, and all Ravager can do is throw cheap shots! BILL HEWSON: It sickens me that you would even suggest that a man like Pit Boss belongs in the Pure Honor division alongside men with actual standards for their in-ring behavior like El Mentiroso and Diamond! Pit Boss gets the space he needs and slides into the ring, Ravager restraining himself from stomping on the man's back, most likely just because he is tired of hearing complaints from the announcers table. Pit Boss and Ravager circle each other slowly, and Pit Boss gestures for a tie-up. Ravager obliges and the two meet in the center of the ring, struggling for control. Ravager quickly gets the upper-hand with a side headlock, wrenching down on it and practically driving Pit Boss to his knees right away. Pit Boss manages to keep his vertical base and backs towards the corner until he can get a foot on the ropes. Ravager breaks the hold without being told and immediately moves to the center of the ring and gestures for Pit Boss to come on again. Pit Boss looks a little surprised that Ravager got the better of that exchange, and flexes his hands warily as he steps into the middle again. They go in for the tie-up... Pit Boss ducks out of the way and drives a knee up into Ravager's stomach. The crowd boos the cheap shot, but Pit Boss ignores it, driving the point of his elbow into back of Ravager's neck before locking in a side headlock of his own. Ravager searches for his grip for a moment, then shifts his body and delivers a back suplex on Pit Boss- no! Pit Boss flips over in midair and lands behind Ravager. Pit Boss with the waistlock... GERMAN SUPLEX! Wait! Ravager with a flip of his own, landing behind a stunned Pit Boss! Ravager grabs Pit Boss in a full nelson, could it be? Last Resort time! No! A third reversal as Pit Boss drops to his knees, frees an arm, and counters with a snapmare takeover into a sleeper hold! BILL HEWSON: Another great exchange from these two men, and I think even Pit Boss might be starting to have some grudging respect for the incredible talent of his opponent, the former NAPW Champion, Ravager. JACK JONES: That isn't respect you see in his eyes, Bill, it is plain and simple pity. Pit Boss has a wild look in his eyes, knowing how close he came to having his neck crushed by the brutal Last Resort. Ravager struggles in the sleeper, fading fast as Pit Boss has it expertly applied, running on an adrenaline rush after that close brush. Ravager pounds the mat with his feet and tries to pry his opponent's arm away, but Pit Boss keeps it locked firmly in place. Ravager manages to get his feet under him and pushes slowly up to a vertical base, but the effort looks like it could have cost him too much as he is practically dead on his feet by the time he gets there. Pit Boss is nodding his head as Henry Andrews raises the arm once... it falls. The crowd is cheering wildly for Ravager, and Tiffany is pounding on the mat to rally her man! Henry Andrews raises the arm again, and despite the encouragement from the crowd and Tiffany, it falls a second time. Pit Boss is yelling that the match is over, and it looks like it might be as Ravager has his arm raised for the third and final time. It drops towards the mat but stops just before Andrews calls for the bell! Ravager raises both of his arms straight up and grabs the top of Pit Boss' head. He goes for the jawbreaker to break the sleeper but Pit Boss releases the sleeper and steps back with a handful of Ravager's hair and Ravager jumps in the air, snapping his head back to slam into the mat. Andrews warns Pit Boss for the hair pull, but he just raises his hands showing him that they are clean. JACK JONES: You can't match skill with this man, Hewson, because Pit Boss will come out on top every single time. Have you ever seen counters so innovative? It is like watching Da Vinci at work! You know if Da Vinci had been a really skilled wrestler instead of some sissy painter. BILL HEWSON: You make my head want to explode, Jack Attack. JACK JONES: Explode with awe! Pit Boss backs into the ropes at an almost casual walk and comes back to drop a fist across Ravager's forehead. Pit Boss goes for a lateral press cover, waiting until Henry Andrews drops for the cover to press his forearm across the throat of Ravager. One. Two. Thr-Ravager kicks out on his own without the least experienced member of the officiating staff noticing the illegal choke. Pit Boss rolls him right back over and goes for the forearm choke pin again. One. Two! Thr-this time Andrews looks up and sees the choke just before he drops his hand on the wearied and oxygen deprived Ravager. He warns Pit Boss, who again holds up his hands. This time though, Pit Boss smirks and flips off Andrews before dropping his hands back down into a blatant choke on Ravager! Ravager drums his heels on the mat and Pit Boss drives his thumbs into his windpipe. An angry Andrews makes a very fast five count, but Pit Boss breaks the hold just before he can be disqualified. Pit Boss stands up and Ravager rolls over on his side, gasping for air. Pit Boss takes a few steps back then comes in to deliver a soccer kick right to Ravager's spine. Ravager arches his back in pain, his fists both clenched until his knuckles are even whiter than the rest of his skin. Pit Boss backs into the ropes again, this time taking a good running start before delivering a second kick right in the same spot. Ravager rolls into the ropes, trying to get up to his feet, and Pit Boss stalks him like a jungle cat. Ravager gets up to his knees and Pit Boss steps through the ropes to the apron behind him. Pit Boss catapults himself over the top and lands with a double stomp to the small of the back of the kneeling Ravager, driving him into the mat. The owner of the Gold Standard tangles his hand in Ravager's hair and drags the silent assassin off the mat only to plant him with a sharp backbreaker. BILL HEWSON: You might not like him, I know I don't, but Pit Boss is displaying some solid ring strategy here. The Pay-Out is extremely damaging to both the legs and the back, and it is clear what he is focusing on here. Ravager is going to be in a bad way very quickly if he doesn't find a way to counter this methodical offense of the Charitable Trust member. JACK JONES: The back is only the half of it! You didn't even mention how brilliant it was for Pit Boss to cut off the most important thing to keep a body going, the air supply! (singing) Now the night has gone! Now the night has gone away! BILL HEWSON: What? JACK JONES: Air Supply! Get some culture, Hewson! Oblivious to the musical lesson being given at by Jack Attack, Pit Boss continues to break down the lower back of Ravager. Hefting the silent assassin up into the air, Pit Boss delivers another backbreaker, driving him down so hard that Ravager practically bounces off his knee to roll into the ropes again. Ravager is clearly in agony, his face twisted only inches away from Tiffany's, who covers her mouth to hide her own worry. Pit Boss again goes out to the apron, clearly enjoying himself now. He grips the top rope and flings himself over for another double stompÉ Ravager turns over and gets both of his boots up! Pit Boss crashes down, catching them both under his chin. Pit Boss takes two slow steps backwards, swings a punch-drunk haymaker at empty air, then collapses backwards in a heap. The crowd is going wild, stomping their feet and cheering for Ravager as he rolls away from the ropes again. Henry Andrews begins the ten count. One! Two! Three! Much to the disappointment of the crowd, it looks like Pit Boss is stirring first. Four! Five! Six! The crowd cheers louder as Ravager pushes his elbows to the mat and gets to his knees while Pit Boss is still flat on the mat. Seven! Eight! Ravager lurches up to his feet as Pit Boss is just getting to his knees. Ravager walks over to Pit Boss and grabs him by the back of the head... Pit Boss pistons a fist out into Ravager's stomach, doubling him over. Pit Boss uses Ravager to help himself up to his feet, then drives a forearm into the man's lower back. Pit Boss sends Ravager to the ropes and ducks down for the back body drop. Telegraphed by Ravager, who responds with a ring-shaking DDT! Pit Boss balances for a moment on the top of his head, legs straight up in the air, before collapsing down to the side! Ravager rolls Pit Boss over and has the presence of mind to hook the leg for the cover. One! Two! Thr-shoulder up! Ravager pounds the mat once in frustration, then rolls Pit Boss back over and pulls him up to his feet. The silent assassin lets Pit Boss know how he feels about him with a few forearm shivers to the back then hooks him for the northern lights suplex. For a moment it seems like the damage done to Ravager's back will be too much to even lift the relatively light Pit Boss, but Ravager braces his legs and hauls him over to crash into the mat. Ravager bridges for the pin! One! Two! Thr-Pit Boss stretches a leg out and onto the ropes and Andrews sees it in time. JACK JONES: What ring presence from Pit Boss, taking away Ravager's only chance, a lucky victory with a cheap move! BILL HEWSON: A clean northern lights suplex is a cheap move now? What is it like to live in your head, Jack? JACK JONES: Why don't you ask your mom? BILL HEWSON: That didn't even make sense. JACK JONES: So's your face. This is what keeps the home audience riveted! Or maybe it is this... RAVAGER has hoisted Pit Boss to the top turnbuckle! He's got it hooked! BUSINESS IS BUSINESS muscle buster on Pit Boss right in the center of the ring. The crowd is on their feet, counting along with Henry Andrews as he counts the pin. ONE! TWO! TH--- Bunker jumps onto the apron in front of Andrews, who leaps up to try to get him down instead of finishing the count! Stump up on the other side of the apron! Ravager gets up in a rage, running past Andrews to deliver a forearm shot to Bunker that nearly knocks him off the apron. Stump is in the ring now, but Ravager seems to sense him coming up behind, and spins to hammer the big man in the jaw with a straight right. Bunker steps over the top rope and Ravager wheels around again, grabbing the top rope and yanking up sharply into Bunker's crotch. His eyes cross, and so do Stump's as Ravager wheels around and just flat out boots him in the balls. Ravager is a whirlwind, rights and lefts to both Bunker and Stump! Andrews can't even call for the bell, since neither bodyguard has done anything except get beaten on! Pit Boss is slowly getting back up to his feet in middle of the ring, trying to shake off the effects of the Business is Business, and having some trouble. Stump finally just falls forward and wraps two meaty arms around Ravager's waist. Ravager struggles to get free as Bunker gets into the ring, but he might as well have an anchor tied to him. Bunker hits the ropes and comes back to nearly break Ravager in half with a huge diving shoulderblock while Stump holds him in place. Now Andrews knows what to do and calls for the bell! Ravager is announced as the winner of the match, but it is drowned out by the boos from the crowd. Pit Boss gestures to Bunker and Stump and they pick Ravager up off the ground. The bodyguards whip Ravager into Pit Boss, who delivers the Pay-Out with all of his might. Ravager is wrapped in the Texas Cloverleaf with nowhere to go, his damaged back being wrenched cruelly. BILL HEWSON: This is nothing more than a mugging! Pit Boss doesn't care about a win here, he just wants to damage Ravager as badly as he possibly can before Complete Control! JACK JONES: Sounds like solid strategy to me! Bunker and Stump stomp away on the back of Ravager's head while Pit Boss continues to hold the deadly Pay-Out. Tiffany slaps the mat in frustration and then SPRINTS to the back... but before she's halfway there, D! and Static explode out of the entrance way and rush the ring! They slide into the ring and immediately, the Charitable Trust slide out. Pit Boss signals for his boys to head to the back as Static bounces on the middle rope, yelling trash-talk to Pit Boss and his boys as they walk backwards towards the ramp, Pit Boss wearing a very satisified expression on his face. Tiffany is on her knees beside Ravager with a look of concern as D! storms the ring, clearly itching to put the beat down on some of his War Games opponents. He checks with Tiffany, who is busy helping Ravager out, and then grabs a microphone from Warburton! D!: Y'know something, Pit Boss, I'm about this sick of you cowards, and I'll remind you that you've got one week --- that's one week --- before there's nowhere to run and you're trapped inside a steel cell with nowhere to run. But right now --- it seems to me that Static and I have a match with TWO of those War Games opponents, so hey! Rees! Jakey! Why don't you bring your cod-lovin' asses out here to the ring... because I don't want to wait, peanut! BILL HEWSON: D! is calling the NFA out even as Pit Boss & his bodyguards are retreating! For the second time tonight, "Fighting 59" kicks up and out strut the duo of Lloyd Rees and Bayman Jakey. They walk past Pit Boss on either side, who directs them to "take out the trash." Lloyd gets up in Pit Boss' face briefly, suggesting that the NFA are able to take care of their own business. Or: "We's able t'take care of our'selves, b'y!". The NFA rush into the ring... D! & STATIC MEET THEM! BILL HEWSON: These men aren't waiting for the bell! We've got to take a commercial! We'll be right back!
BILL HEWSON: Welcome back, folks, and during the break, the NFA took over after Bayman Jakey threw Static right into the steel steps! It's been all NFA since that occured, and Static could seriously use a tag out to D! JACK JONES: What was it you said during the break? You liked this duo, like 'Crimes...said real loud?' or something? BILL HEWSON: Yes, I think Static & D! is one helluva team, Jones. JACK JONES: And now look in that ring! The NFA is a cohesive unit and these two clownshoes are egos thrown together. No way I'd bet the over on these horses. Jack Jones commentary is on the money right now, as Bayman Jakey sends Static flying into the corner. Jakey charges --- Static sidesteps the charge, then elevates and nails his man with a textbook dropkick to the grill. Jakey stumbles into the wrong corner and D! wallops him with a hard right hand. Jakey stumbles back to the middle of the ring where Static jumps again and sends his man flying with a hurricanrana. Static with the hot cover, but Jakey kicks out at TWO. Static applies a side headlock and attempts to keep the bigger man worn down. Jakey gains his second wind and lifts Static up and drops him with a back suplex. Jakey gets in a few angry stomps before dragging Static to his corner and tags Rees. Jakey holds Static wide open and Rees nails him in the ribs with a closed fist. Smythe admonishes both men about the rules, but they largely ignore her. Rees whips Static into the ropes and really hurts his man with the East End Drop, D! wincing in sympathy. Rees covers, but Static kicks out at TWO. Rees pounds on the smaller man mercilessly before signaling for a quick end. Conception Bay Chinlock! The dragon is locked in and the grapevine is secured as Static has seemingly no way out. JACK JONES: This is it, baby! Payday! BILL HEWSON: Degenerate gamblers never really win in the end. JACK JONES: Oh just shut it, Bill. Smythe checks Static's arm and it falls once... twice... (three timesssss a lady, heh)... but not the third time. Static wills himself to stay awake and the crowd feeds him their cheers. Rees doesn't want to continue to struggle against Static's second wind and wisely drives an elbow into his stomach. Rees tags in Jakey, who springboards off the ropes and drops Static with a clothesline. Jakey covers, but Smythe is busy hustling Rees to his corner. When she finally does make the count, Static kicks out. Jakey is irate and looks to punish his man mercilessly. He starts out with a side Russian legsweep and follows that with the Bell Island Back Breaker. Static is in a world of hurt, but Jakey grows impatient and releases the hold. He readies his opponent for the Paradise Powerbomb, but Static drills his fist into Jakey's head and face before throwing him over with the headscissors. Static is down and hurt, but dragging himself to a very anxious D! Jakey grabs Static by the leg and lifts him up. Static bounces around before drilling his opponent in the head with an enziguri. Jakey checks out and falls flat on his face as Static hits D! for the hot tag! BILL HEWSON: D! IS A HOUSE OF FIRE! D! is met in the ring by a charging Lloyd Rees, who gets sent tumbling to the outside by a D! backdrop (and no Salty to catch him and set him right.) D! lifts a rising Jakey and begins pummeling him with the Beat-O-Barrage, culminating with a Rockettes Kick of Doom! Jakey is down and D! makes the cover, but the count only gets to one when Rees runs back in and nails D! with a double axe handle to the head. Rees and D! trade blows until D! whips him into the ropes boom, Nyquil Driver. Rees rolls to the outside as Jakey wisely taunts Static, causing Morgan Smythe to be busy restraining Static from coming into the ring. Jakey uses this opportunity to hit D! with a hard low blow and then roll him up for the pin. Smythe turns to make the count, but D! manages to kick out at 2. Jakey discreetly jabs his thumb into D!'s eye before wailing on him with hard blows and follows it with a DDT in the center of the ring. Jakey goes to tag Rees, but he's still hurting from the last attack. Jakey climbs to the top and readies for the Upper Gullies Bum Drop, but Static shakes the ropes and causes him to lose balance. Nutcracker Suite! Jakey is hurting as D! goes up and... what's he doing? He's got Jakey? OH MY GOD! NYQUIL DRIVER from the top rope! Modified, not all that pretty, but somehow it connected! D! makes the cover... ONE! TWO! THREE! FRANK WARBURTON: Here are your winners... STATIC and DEEEEEE! JACK JONES: What... wait a minute, that wasn't supposed to happen! BILL HEWSON: Hope you didn't bet your mortgage on this match, Jones! D! and Static take the win --- hey now, just hold on a minute! D! is busy getting announced the winner and getting his hand raised when Rees comes from behind and locks D! up in the Conception Bay Chinlock. Static notices and is about to come to the rescue when the Celtic Assassins show up and drop him from behind. Jakey is up again and looking pissed. He helps the Celts lay the boots to Static while Rees continues to punish D! in his submission. Suddenly, to the surprise of many, out runs EVAN CARTWRIGHT with his trusty singapore cane! Cartwright whacks Lloyd across the top of the head! Jakey gets him from behind, Evan nails him with the butt of the cane! Clothesline sends Jakey over the top! Evan grabs Lloyd Rees, shoots him to the ropes --- The Celtic Assassins grabs Lloyd's legs and snake him out of the ring! JACK JONES: What the hell business does Evan Cartwright have out here? Since when does HE like D! or Static? BILL HEWSON: I don't know that he does, but I do know that Evan Cartwright will wrestle The Celtic Assassins AND Lloyd Rees in one week at the Supercard! This is a pre-emptive strike! Whatever gets your opposition. Now we have a commercial break to take, and then it will be... for the first time and the last time in an NAPW ring... the TAIPEI Deatch Match!
JACK JONES: Let's keep this simple. Put the kids to bed. Now. BILL HEWSON: For once we're in agreement, Jack Attack. This match is not going to be pretty. "Man In the Box" plays over the speakers... Tommy Deathrow makes his way to the ring to a chorus of boos. He holds up his hands, which have already been taped up and covered in broken glass. He grins devilishly and licks his lips, reminding the fans that they're in the presence of a SUPERSTAR. BILL HEWSON: Both men have had their hands taped up, dipped in glue, then in broken glass. This is not about wrestling. There will be no Pure Honor in this match. This is simple brutality. JACK JONES: And most people seem to have forgotten the added Wheel of Death Stipulation --- The ropes are covered with barbed wire! It's... it's barbaric! BILL HEWSON: And that's the way these two men like it. "Celestial" by Isis plays. The fans *POP* as "Sick Billy" Kryenik makes his way to the ring, tag team title belt around his waist! He walks around the fans at ringside, letting them get a close look at his hands. That glass is real folks. A "We Want Blood" chant starts in the crowd. BILL HEWSON: The fans want blood. They won't have long to wait. JACK JONES: Liberal sickos. FRANK WARBURTON: Ladies and gentlemen. This is the Taipei Death Match! And that is ALL we need, because Deathrow has lunged at Kryenik. Warburton wisely leaves the ring. Deathrow is throwing jabs at Kryenik, who is ducking the shots. Kryenik comes back with a few jabs of his own, but Deathrow manages to avoid any contact. BILL HEWSON: Neither man wants to get hit, and who can blame them? Deathrow and Kryenik circle each other, each looking to get in the first shot. Kryenik delivers a stiff kick to Deathrow's leg. As Deathrow stumbles, Kryenik delivers a right hook to Deathrow's head! And just like that, Deathrow is cut. The fans pop. Kryenik gets another shot in, and Deathrow drops to the mat and slides under the bottom rope, avoiding the barbed wire. Kryenik goes for a baseball slide, but Deathrow, despite the blood flowing out of his head, has enough to get out of the way. Kryenik lands on his feet, but turns and gets a left cross to the face. Kryenik is stunned, allowing Deathrow to follow up with a backhand chop to Kryenik's chest. An audible groan can be heard in the crowd as Kryenik's chest bleeds. Deathrow grins when he sees his former partner bleed. He puts Kryenik in a headlock, then starts punching his opponent in the head. Kryenik, out of desperation, lifts up Deathrow and drops him on his back. Deathrow yells in pain, Kryenik tries to regain his senses and the floor is slowly turning red. JACK JONES: Well, we have one wrestling move. Which I believe is a record for a Taipei Death match. BILL HEWSON: My God, this match is barely five minutes old and already both men are bleeding like stuck pigs! Both men slide back into the ring, avoiding the barbed wire. But they can't avoid it for long. Kryenik kicks Deathrow in the groin, then whips him into the ropes. More groans from the crowd as Deathrow tries to pull himself away from the wire. Kryenik doesn't waste any time, as he crashes into Deathrow, sending the two of them over the top rope (and further pressing Deathrow into the barbed wire) JACK JONES: That wasn't a clothesline, or a spear, or a splash. Kryenik just ran into him! BILL HEWSON: And it worked! Kryenik opened up some nasty gashes in Deathrow's back! Indeed. Blood is seeping out of Deathrow's back, and the fans are wondering how much longer this can go on. It seems the wrestlers are wondering the same thing. Kryenik goes to retrieve a chair, and Deathrow is digging under the ring for something. JACK JONES: Their hands are covered in glass! The ropes have barbed wire on them! And they're still looking for more weapons! They're insane! Deathrow is still digging under the ring as Kryenik comes around the corner. Kryenik raises the chair just as Deathrow emerges, Deathrow is going to get nailed with... No! Deathrow kicks the chair back in Kryenik's face! And now we see what Deathrow was looking for! Deathrow has pulled a table out from under the ring, and slides it in! The fans pop, chanting "we want tables". JACK JONES: Why do they have to chant that? Can't they see that they already have a table? BILL HEWSON: Don't spoil their fun. JACK JONES: You call enjoying this 'match' fun? BILL HEWSON: The fans paid to see it, even if it is brutal! What the hell is Deathrow doing now? Deathrow sets the table up in the ring, as the stunned and bloody Kryenik gets to his feet. He climbs back into the ring, only to have Deathrow leap on him and start punching him. Deathrow tosses Kryenik into the corner, then charges in with a clothesline- no! Kryenik moved! Deathrow chest first into the turnbuckles! And now Kryenik grabs Deathrow by the hair and ... He's dragging Deathrow's face across the barbed wire covered top rope! The fans howl in sadistic delight, and Kryenik smiles. He picks up Deathrow and dumps him on the table. Kryenik climbs on the table. He's going for the Dry Lake! This will break Deathrow in half! No! What the --- FIREBALL! Deathrow was playing possum! BILL HEWSON: OH MY GAAWWWWD! JACK JONES: That was --- that was a freaking FIREBALL in Kryenik's face! Tommy Deathrow IS A SUPERSTAR, BABY! BILL HEWSON: And Billy Kryenik, he may have second-degree, third-degree burns all over his face! And Tommy Deathrow doesn't give a DAMN. The fans chant "HOLY SHIT, HOLY SHIT!" And Deathrow doesn't give his opponent any chance to breathe! Deathrow shoves Kryenik off the table, and onto the ropes! Kryenik is entangled in the barbed wire! Oh God that had to hurt! Sharplin tries to free Kryenik from the ropes, but is pushed away by Deathrow, who starts to kick at his prone opponent. Kryenik finally comes loose of the ropes, but he is bleeding worse than ever. BILL HEWSON: Tommy Deathrow senses victory now... wait a minute, he's going outside the ring again? He could have Kryenik beat right here! What more can he possibly do to the man? Deathrow digs under the ring apron, and he pulls out... a large cloth bag? Do we really need to ask what's inside? Deathrow gets back in the ring, and deposits the contents of the bag on the table... BILL HEWSON: GOOD GOD! THUMBTACKS! THOUSANDS OF THUMBTACKS! JACK JONES: You asked what he was doing outside the ring! You asked what more Deathrow could possibly do to Billy Kryenik! YOU'VE GOT YOUR ANSWER! THOUSANDS OF THUMBACKS! With the crowd booing Deathrow heavily, the SUPERSTAR picks up Kryenik and slams him on the table. The table doesn't break, but Kryenik now has thousands of pieces of metal embedded in his back! Deathrow carefully climbs onto the table, and positions Kryenik for the Deathrow Driver! He nods sadistically to the crowd --- Kryenik fights it! Deathrow punches Kryenik in the back, opening up more cuts! He tries again, Kryenik still fighting for all his worth! Deathrow with several knees to Kryenik's head! Neither man willing to give up! Deathrow tries to land his signature move one more time! ... Kryenik goes to one knee... Low Blow! With his glass covered hand! And every male in existence winces! JACK JONES: Holy Hell! There will be no future SUPERSTARS! BILL HEWSON: Wait a minute! Kryenik --- just hooked Deathrow's arms! OH MY GOD! DRY LAKE! DRY LAKE! DRRRRRY LAAAAAKE! The table breaks in half! Both men now have thumbtacks embedded in every part of their body! Deathrow is out! Kryenik --- drapes his arm over Deathrow for the cover! One ! Two ! Th--- YOU HAVE GOT TO BE FREAKING KIDDING ME KICK OUT. The crowd is stunned. The announcers are stunned silent! Tommy Deathrow & Billy Kryenik are human pin-cushions, and Deathrow kicked out of the Dry Lake... both men are down! Sharplin begins counting ONE...TWO...THREE...neither man is moving! Both men are bloody messes, chests heaving up and down heavily... FOUR...FIVE...SIX...SEVEN...wait a minute! Deathrow is starting to get up, grabbing the barbed wire to help him up cuts be damned! Kryenik gets up... the count is broken! Wait a minute, Billy socks Deathrow in the stomach with the glass-covered first! Deathrow doubles over and Kryenik is able to hook the arms... he can't do it again! THE DRY LAKE IN THE SEA OF TACKS! Tommy Deathrow driven face first, his leg quivering. Kryenik rolls over with his last ounce of energy and drapes an arm over Deathrow. ONE! TWO! ...THREEEEEE! FRANK WARBURTON: And your winner via pinfall... SICK! BILLY! KRYENNNNNIK! Both men are down, Kryenik slumping off of Tommy and not moving. Sharplin is in considerable pain, his hand full of thumb tacks from just making the three count. EMTs are headed towards the ring as neither man is moving. Slowly, very slowly, the EMTs carefully put each man on a stretcher. Kryenik is wheeled out, Evan Cartwright coming out to check on his new partner. Cartwright grabs Kryenik's tag belt and walks with the EMTs as they begin to wheel Kryenik out. Suddenly, Kryenik raises his arm up from the stretcher! The crowd roars! BILL HEWSON: That was not a match folks. That was a massacre. The fact that either man is still alive after that is a miracle. We'll be right back after this message.
BILL HEWSON: Welcome back, as we are still cleaning up the mess from the TaiPei Deathmatch. It took two Dry Lakes, a table, thousands of thumb tacks, but Sick Billy Kryenik was able to score the pinfall over his former partner, Superstar Tommy Deathrow. EMTs are trying to help Deathrow out, both of these men need medical attention! JACK JONES: Here comes Krusty Kid Paul, Hewson, maybe he can talk some sense into Tommy. A drunk looking Tommy sits on the ring apron, a bloody mess as EMTs try to convince him to get on the stretcher. KKP strides down, looking possibly concerned? He offers his flask to Deathrow, who takes a big long swig of whatever hard alcohol fills the flask. Not the best way to help with blood loss, but Deathrow... throws an arm over KKP's shoulder, and the two begin to WALK up the aisle! The crowd is on their feet for Tommy Deathrow? JACK JONES: I can't believe this town is showing respect for a true Superstar! BILL HEWSON: Believe it or don't, but this Vancouver crowd is on their feet, giving a standing ovation for Tommy Deathrow! He gave you his heart, he gave you his soul, he gave you everything in this match --- JACK JONES: And he's giving you the finger, Hewson! COS HE'S THE SUPERSTAR! Tommy Deathrow turns around to the fans, looking them over almost appreciatively... before he raises his hand and flips the bird to the entire crowd! The cheers turn to boos, and Deathrow grins sickly through his crimson mask and "crotch thrusts" to the hot ladies near the entrance way, who recoil in disgust at his bloody gesture. Fade out on Deathrow telling the Vancouver fans where the hell they can go as the ring crew tries to get the ring cleaned up as fast as possible...
Video package begins. Rex Caliber wins the NAPW title, making Minstrel tap out at Sole Survivor. Devastating standing tall after winning the Sole Survivor match itself. Dramatic music. Suddenly --- grainy black and white! Rex Caliber being attacked by two unidentified men! Rex Caliber is injured and unable to defend his title belt! Devastation brutalizes Static --- Burning Hammers! Devastation & Pit Boss destroy Static & Ravager when Rex Caliber returns to NAPW rings. Who will he side with? HE ATTACKS THE TRUST! Last week --- Devastation taking the ball bat to Rex's injured ribs! Rex coughing up blood! Devastatio standing tall! AND IT --- IS --- NOW. Darkness in the arena. A few flash bulbs pop, and then at last the lighting and music begins. This particular combination can mean only one man:
"We don't need no water, let the mother(BLEEP)er burn... And as the crowd resists the urge to sing along and instead BOO, BOO, BOO with all they've got... out walks the Vicious Phenom himself, Devastation! And he is followed... by Pit Boss with Bunker & Stump. Then ... Lloyd Rees & Bayman Jakey... and The Celtic Assassins! The Charitable Trust and the ~nFa~ are coming out together, with Devastation leading the way. FRANK WARBURTON: It is now time for the NAPW Monday Night Fights MAAAAAIN EVENNNNT! The following contest is scheduled for ONE FALL, and is for the NAPW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing first, the challenger being accompanied by the CHARITABLE TRUST and NEW FOUND ALLIANCE! Standing six-feet and EIGHT inches tall, weighing three-hundred and five pounds... from South Boston, Massachussets... The Vicious Phenom! THIS! IS! DEVASTAAAAAATION! Devastation gets into the ring (alone) and proceeds to pose in the center to a chorus of boos. The lights return to normal and his music kills. Devastation hits the corner, motioning for 'the belt' around his waist. Then... for the second time tonight... X-Ecutioners and their Zombie remix kick in. The crowd goes BANANA as REX! CALIBER! ENTERS THE BUILDING THE CHAMPION! ALONE! FRANK WARBURTON: AND HIS OPPONENT! (struggling to be heard over the roar) FROM PARTS UNKNOWN, NORTH CAROLINA! At six-foot THREE, two-hundred and forty five pounds... HE IS YOUR HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION... THE NEXUS ONE! THIS! IS! REEEEEEX CALIBERRRRRRR! BILL HEWSON: And Rex Caliber, you've got to admire, he hasn't brought anybody to ringside with him. Devastation might as well have the with him! JACK JONES: The Trust & the NFA are just here to witness history, when Devastation becomes the NAPW Heavyweight Champion for the first time, Hewson. You're so incredibly paranoid. BILL HEWSON: Caliber with a lot of pride, asking his War Games team-mates not to come help him out at ringside, but you gotta wonder at the wisdom of that decision when Devastation brought every ally he has in NAPW to the ring. Rex Caliber gets in the ring and goes right up to Devastation, not backing down at all. Caliber talks trash to Devastation then hits the corner and raises his title belt high. He backs down --- and gets blindsided by Devastation! DING DING DING. Dick Kiebiech calls for the bell and this title match is on! Devastation immediately all over Rex Caliber, targeting the man's taped ribs with boom-like forearms. He's got Caliber in the corner and with tremendous velocity irish whips the champion into the opposite corner CALIBER EXPLODES OUT! Rex flies out with a hard lariat that staggers Devastation. Caliber hits the ropes and hits another Lariat, Devastation still stands. Caliber with another one --- CAUGHT! Black Hole Slam takes Caliber down, and there's a quick cover! ONE, TWO, Caliber kicks out. Devastation takes his feet, pulling Rex up behind him. He leans Rex against the ropes, delivering a huge open-handed chop to Caliber's chest! The crowd "Whooos" that one, then boos Devastation. Devastation with another open-handed chop. Caliber suddenly revives and grabs Devastation by the ears, spinning him around. KNIFE EDGE CHOPS by Rex Caliber on Devastation! WHOOO! WHOOO! WHOOO! Head of steam --- LARIAT sends Devastation over and out of the ring, right into his crowd of allies/lackeys/associates/whatever. The crowd pops for Rex Caliber as Pit Boss & Bunker help a livid Devastation up. Pit Boss suddenly grabs Dev, apparently with some strategy. BILL HEWSON: Injured ribs or not, there aren't many men who can match Rex Caliber pound-for-pound in intensity. He will never quit, he will never say die, and THAT is why he has climbed the ladder to become NAPW Heavyweight Champion. JACK JONES: He may say "I Quit" before this match is through, Hewson. We're talking about being in the ring with the VICIOUS PHENOM, not Joey Malone! Devastation returns to the ring apron. Rex Caliber rushes, Devastation low bridges! Rex spills to the outside as Devastation quickly gets into the ring and... well, distracts Dick Kiebiech! Which of course means that the ~nFa~ have the freedom to put the boots to Rex Caliber on the outside as the crowd voices their disapproval. Lloyd Rees rolls Rex Caliber back in the ring, opening his hands to show he was just 'helping Rex back in' when Kiebiech questions him. Kiebiech tells the ~nFa~ to stay out of this. Devastation lifts Rex Caliber into a gorilla press, displaying his power --- and then drops Caliber rib-first across his knee. Even Pit Boss winces at that one, as the ~nFa~ get a good chuckle. No cover, Devastation instead opting to grab the ropes and choke the life out of Rex with his boot, drawing a count from Kiebiech. Devastation breaks at four, then reminds Kiebiech "I've got a five count, 'DICK'". JACK JONES: Well, he does! BILL HEWSON: I'd be asking too much to see Devastation wrestle a clean match, wouldn't I? JACK JONES: Bill Hewson, you might as well wish for a unicorn. BILL HEWSON: ... will you be serious?! Devastation? Deadly serious as he's hit the canvas, grounding Rex Caliber with a leg scissors around Caliber's torso, using his tree-trunk like legs to squeeze the life out of the champion. Caliber tries to break free, twisting, but Devastation raises a leg and jacknifes it down onto Rex's ribs to cut that off. Devastation continues to squeeze, obviously exploiting Caliber's well-known damaged ribs from the assault almost one month ago, which has never been given the time to truly heal. Devastation: "ASK HIM." Kiebiech glares at Dev, "I KNOW HOW TO DO MY JOB! YOU DO YOURS!" Kiebiech does indeed ask Rex if he quits, to which Rex shakes his head and yells "(BLEEP) NO!" Caliber rolls back and jams an elbow in Devastation's sternum. Another, another, PISTONNNNNNNS! Caliber with rapid-fire elbows in Devastation's sternum, and finally the champ is free! Caliber staggers a step, then hits the ropes at full-speed and hits the RUNNING STO on Devastation --- ROCK BOTTOM! Devastation countered the STO with a, well, devastating Rock Bottom! He covers! ONE! TWO! KICK OUT. Devastation argues the count with Kiebiech, then grabs Caliber by the bald head. Irish whip sends the champ into the corner, Devastation following up with a huge splash/clothesline. Rex staggers out, but Devastation palms his face and shoves him back in. Corner clothesline! Another! Another! Sort-of like Devastation's signature "Rapid Fire" combination. Caliber is dazed in the corner and Devastation gets some momentum... CHARGE! Moved? Nope, Caliber got squashed. He stumbles out, eating a toe-kick by Devastation. Double-underhook powerbomb ... GOOD LORD! RIGHT ONTO HIS KNEE! Devastation opted instead for a double-underhook into a Rib Buster. Caliber holds his ribs, kicking in pain as Devastation raises his arms out to the crowd, demanding adulation. BOOOOOO! BILL HEWSON: What a cocky bastard! You have the man, pin him! Devastation somehow...loves hearing these fans boo him! JACK JONES: It's all about making sure the humanoids know their place, Bill Hewson. There's the cover, this is over! Rex Caliber gets his shoulder up at two and a half. Devastation casually grabs Rex by the head and tosses him over the top rope, drawing the ire of Kiebiech. Devastation argues back, neatly ensuring Kiebiech's back is to the outside. Bunker hauls up Rex Caliber, then slams the man rib-first into the steel ring post! The Celtic Assassins roll Rex Caliber back in the ring as Devastation 'finally' sees Kiebiech's point. Back to work immediately, Devastation hauls Rex Caliber up... GOURDBUSTER! Devastation wastes no time, another move... SHOULDERBREAKER! Cover follows, ONE, TWO, TH--- Rex Caliber gets a foot on the bottom ropes. Devastation says that should be three, but Kiebiech points to the foot on the bottom rope. Devastation, furious, picks Rex Caliber up... SHORT-ARM CLOTHESLINE. Rapid Fire comin' up! Devastation holds Caliber's arm, letting him slump, then draws him in for another short-arm clothesline. The challenger continuing to hold onto Rex Caliber's arm, letting the champion sag in exhaustion before pulling him up... Caliber ducks the third lariat! Spins around behind and hits a huge, huge Reverse German Suplex! "Size Matters Not" to Rex Caliber, who just dumped Devastation on his head in an unbelievable display! BILL HEWSON: And now both men are down, Dick Kiebiech with the standing ten count! Rex Caliber needs to capitalize on that German Suplex! Devastation has pounded him from pillar to post for almost fifteen minutes, and Caliber has to come back NOW. JACK JONES: I'll agree with you on that, but I don't think Rex Caliber CAN come back, Hewson! The crowd is rallying behind Rex Caliber, stomping and cheering, as Kiebiech counts. He's up to five before either man moves, and it's Devastation who moves first. Devastation takes his feet at seven as Rex is starting to climb up with the ropes. Devastation makes an "It's OVER" gesture and grabs Caliber... inverted fireman's carry! It's the BURNING HAMMER... Rex Caliber slides off of Devastation's back, Devastation turns around, DDT! Caliber covers! ONE! TWO! KICK OUT! Rex Caliber and Devastation back up, Devastation swings, Rex Caliber blocks it and nails a toe-kick, hooks Dev up, CRADLE SUPLEX! Incredible strength for Rex Caliber, COVER! ONE! TWO! THREE---- NO! SO CLOSE! Rex Caliber with some momentum, and he hits the ropes, tripped up by Pit Boss! Rex Caliber stumbles, and that's all Devastation needs to catch Rex Caliber in a crushing bear hug, holding Rex up high against his body! BILL HEWSON: How in the world is Rex Caliber supposed to win a match with 87 other guys at ringside? And now, Caliber is in a world of trouble in that crushing bear hug from the six-eight monster Devastation! JACK JONES: Rex Caliber's pride is going to cost him the belt --- hey! Rex told them not to come out here! BILL HEWSON: I think they've watched in the back long enough, and they're sick and tired of the cheating! Who are "they?" THEY are D! STATIC! RAVAGER! EVAN CARTWRIGHT! And those four men are STORMING the ringside at a run! They crash headlong into the throng of the ~nFa~ and Charitable Trust members! Ravager going right for Pit Boss! D! & Lloyd Rees tying it up! Static & Evan Cartwright (WITH KENDO STICK) crashing into the bodyguards and Celtic Assassins! But none of that HELPS Rex Caliber, who is fading out to the pressure of the bear hug. The arm drops ONCE. Dick Kiebiech grabs Rex's arm a second time, lifts it up... and it DROPS. JACK JONES: THIS IS IT, Bill Hewson! That arm drops one more time and we have a brand new champion! BILL HEWSON: It's bonzo gonzo on the outside, even as Rex Caliber is one drop of the hand away from losing his title! And I don't know if he's conscious! Kiebiech takes a hold of Rex's arm one more time, lifts it, it drops... NO. Rex Caliber's arm stays up! It starts shaking! Rex Caliber has both hands free, bell clap across Devastation's ears. Another bell clap! The rules of wrestling say THREE, so one more causes Devastation to lose his grip! Rex Caliber starts firing away on Devastation with right hands, right hands, right hands as Dick Kiebiech is attempting to now regain some order on the outside as eleven bodies are brawling. Caliber backs Devastation into the corner, irish whip! Devastation reverses, sending Caliber in, Devastation charges and gets CAUGHT with one HELL of an STO! Rex Caliber quickly covers, Kiebiech is late getting the count, ONE, TWO, Th---Devastation kicks out! Rex Caliber holds three fingers up, shocked, but Kiebiech regrettably says it was only two. Rex Caliber looks at his hands, eyes glazing over... and suddenly Caliber is all over Devastation with stiff forearms to the shoulders! He's got an arm, Devastation is fight, Rex drives his arm into Devastaton's shoulder blades, he's got BOTH ARMS ON THE BIG MAN! RINGS OF REX ARE APPLIED! DEVASTATION IS GOING TO TAP OUT! THE CHAMPION IS GOING TO MAKE DEVASTATION TAP OUT! Wait a minute, Pit Boss just rolled Ravager into the ring and continues to work him over! Kiebiech immediately tries to get the two men out of the ring, and while he's distracted Bayman Jakey rolls into the ring with the RING BELL. KLANG! He nails it across the back of Rex's head! Rex crashes to the canvas as Ravager clotheslines Pit Boss out over the top and follows him out. Kiebiech turns around to see Devastation hauling Rex Caliber up on his shoulders! BILL HEWSON: Not like this, NOT LIKE THIS! THE BURNING HAMMER CONNECTS! JACK JONES: This match is OVER, Bill Hewson! BILL HEWSON: Dammit, dammit, the cover! ONE! TWO! THREE----- JACK JONES & BILL HEWSON: HOLY HELLLLL! BILL HEWSON: HE KICKED OUT! HE KICKED OUT! HE KICKED OWWWWWT! The entire arena is SHOCKED, particularly DEVASTATION. He looks shocked, even at a loss for possibly the first time in his career. But Kiebiech is insistent --- Rex Caliber kicked out at TWO POINT NINE. On the outside, Evan Cartwright is being held by Al Thoes while Bobby O'Brady takes shots at him. Obviously Kryenik would be appreciated, but he's in the freaking hospital right now! D! & Pit Boss are tearing into one another, Bunker blindsides D! Static & Ravager, in the front row, brawl with Bayman Jakey, Lloyd Rees and Stump! Devastation is arguing with Kiebiech as Rex Caliber in his delirium nails Devastation from behind! Kiebiech gets squashed in the corner, slumping down. Rex Caliber smashes Devastation, then again, until finally he does the front pick-up, placing Devastation on the top rope! Caliber signals for the TOTAL ANNIHILATION! He tries to pick Devastation up, Devastation won't allow him to nail it, so Rex punches him in the mush and climbs up! Caliber...what the hell is he going to do? CLANG! Lloyd Rees just snuck into the ring with a steel chair, SMASHING it against Caliber's back! Lloyd rolls out and throws the chair under the ring! Rex's War Games partners are in a crazy brawl on the outside! BILL HEWSON: Oh good God, what is Devastation doing? He's STANDING on the top turnbuckle! Oh my God... HE'S NOT! JACK JONES: If he DOES, this one is OVER! BILL HEWSON: Devastation... THE BURNING HAMMER...OFF THE TOP ROPE! SWEET MOTHER OF GOD! JACK JONES: HOLLLLY HELLLLLLLL! BILL HEWSON: THE COVER! ONE! TWO! NOT LIKE THIS... THREEEEEE! FRANK WARBURTON: Here is YOUR winner...and NEWWWWWW NAPW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPEEEEEEN... DEV...A...STATIONNNNNN! JACK JONES: WE HAVE A NEW CHAMPION, BILL HEWSON! AND HE IS THE VICIOUS PHENOM! BILL HEWSON: I never would've expected it, I never would've believed it, but it's true! Thanks to that bastard LLOYD REES and that steel chair shot! But my GOD, a Burning Hammer from the top rope! Security, perhaps still dealing with the aftermath of TAIPEI, finally starts to swarm the ring, but they barely outnumber the fighting wrestlers! The melee cannot hope to be contained, but in the ring, a dazed Dick Kiebiech raises the hand of an exhausted, sweating, weary Devastation. The title belt is handed to Devastation, who stands over an unconscious Rex Caliber and holds the belt high in both hands. One week from Complete Control, and the balance of power in NAPW has shifted drastically. The final scene NAPW fans see before the Supercard... Is Devastation. NAPW Heavyweight Champion. Lights down.
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