ANNIVERSARY ASSAULT10/31/2006
People always try to cut me down but I! Slow motion images of NAPW wrestlers in moments of glory and anguish as the verse begins. I don't ever give a (BLEEP) what people say One year ago --- Ravager. The Moose. Static. Lobo. I try and listen to the voice inside my head The Dragon. Viking. Plague. The New & Improved D-X. D!. I try BOOOOOM! HIGH SPEED EDITING! Moments and moments THROUGHOUT NAPW'S YEAR-LONG STORY!
I FEEL SO BEAUTIFUL TODAY!
Rex Caliber! Billy Kryenik! Chris Casino! The Dudes! Static! I'm not ever gonna fall in line cos I More action shots of... The Decapitators! Storm! Devastation! Evan Cartwright! I don't want to be another plastic mind JC Cook! The Crusher! Don Travelli! Karl Van Helden! Minstrel! I try and listen to the voice inside my head PredatorImmortalMirageNightmare! Technique! The Delivery Men! Stein! I try
How about Tommy Deathrow? Krusty Kid Paul! Dextro! Storm... then North T. Gunderson!
I FEEL SO BEAUTIFUL TODAY!
"The Lemondrop Kid" Lloyd Rees! Patrick Bickle! Dez Carter! Stiff Competition! Celtic Assassins!
You're just like everybody... The newest crop of superstars: Simply Beautiful! Royal Foundation! Patrick Kidd! The Yellow Chicken! David Banks! WHY WOULD I WANT TO BE LIKE YOU? One year it has been building to this... 365 days men have vied to be the best in the west... 12 months it has been since New Alberta Pro opened its doors...
One!
THIS IS THE CULMINATION!
I FEEL SO BEAUTIFUL TODAY!
ANNIVERSARY ASSAULT... IS NOW.
BILL HEWSON: Ladies and gentlemen! Wrestling fans in Canada and wherever you may be watching on NAPW.ca... the moment you've been waiting for is here! NAPW ANNIVERSARY ASSAULT IS NOW! Good evening everyone, I'm Bill "Sherlock" Hewson alongside my broadcast partner for the past year of action... Jack "Attack" Jones! And Jack, well, I don't know if Leisure Suit Larry had much better luck with the ladies than you. JACK JONES: Hey, I'll have you know Larry was king superfly, at least if you used the walk-through and beat the game like I did. Bill Hewson, I can't believe it's been one year and you're still employed! Another bet I lost! BILL HEWSON: It's been great working alongside you too, Jones, thanks very much --- And then, Social Code cuts out. Seconds later the sounds of AKFORTY pump through the PA. The crowd rises to their feet and BOOOOOOS... Jeff James! BILL HEWSON: And we are not going to wait one minute longer to get this event started! Television Title on the line in this first match, NO TIME LIMIT... there must be a winner! It was one month ago at HOSTILE HANGOVER that Jeff James and Yellow Chicken wrestled to a time limit draw, stealing the show even from the Iron Man match. Tonight... these two will settle the score! JACK JONES: Jeff James has been like a man possessed as of late, Hewson. He wants the TV Title back so bad he can taste it. And we've seen how far he's willing to go to beat Yellow Chicken! BILL HEWSON: Last week on Action! of course, Jeff James tarred and feathered the TV Champion... and not only the TV Champion, Yellow Chicken, formerly Carter Owens for those of you unsure who I'm talking about... Yellow Chicken is also the Provincial Champion! Quite the turnaround for a man who once boasted a record of 3 wins, 9 losses! Jeff James hits the ring... he's all business. He climbs to the top rope --- and then just to prove a point, he backflips off the top rope. A reminder to the fans that he can do things Yellow Chicken can't, the high-flying. [EARLIER TONIGHT] The Royal Foundation are in their locker room, sans Saki (who is likely still in jail.) Mr. B, Prince Darko, Thomas Young, Jeff James planning strategy. MR. B: So when you want us to come out and blast Chicken, I want you to give us this signal! Got it Jeff? JEFF JAMES: (BLEEP) that. THOMAS YOUNG: What are you talking about, man? JEFF JAMES: I get help to beat this guy then I don't prove nothing. I gotta do this alone... not with you, bro, not with you Darko, not with you Mr. B you jackass. This match tonight, this is gonna be Jeff James... versus The Yellow Chicken... and only the best man is gonna walk out with the TV title belt. Jeff James leaves the Foundation locker room, stunning his compatriots. Back to live action. JACK JONES: Now how can you give a man like that flack? We're going to see a one-on-one WRESTLING match to decide a title that, well, hell, used to be the loser title. But Jeff James and Yellow Chicken have raised the TV Title to a level it hasn't known since the great Don Travelli held it! BILL HEWSON: Don Travelli of course the only three-time TV Champion... this is going to be one for the ages, what a way to open up the biggest show in NAPW's history! We cut backstage, live, and Mean Gene Okerlund...I mean John Reynolds is standing by with the Television. That's a hell of a costume! Yellow Chicken isn't left out of the party either, dressed up as an old school Jeff Jarrett! JOSH REYNOLDS: Ladies and gentlemen we're here with the one and only Yellow Chicken, looking to defend his Television Title yet again here tonight. YC, how do you feel about the match? YELLOW CHICKEN: Well, HA. Lemme tell you something, HA! Out there, you got Jeff James! Right here, you got the the NAPW Television Champion of the World, THE J E DOULBE F, J A Double R, E Double T HA, JEFF JARRETT! And I'm gonna go out there, and show everyone, HA, that this TV title is MINE for good! We cut back to ringside and James is waiting in the ring, all of a sudden - BAD COUNTRY! Yellow Chicken is coming out to Jarrett's music, and the fans are eating it up! Look at em go crazy for the Tele-vincial Champion! He's slapping high fives with every little kid he sees, and he gets in the ring, does he Double J strut, and takes off the costume, ready for ACTION! BILL HEWSON: How about that! I've never seen a guy who's just so effortlessly a crowd pleaser! JACK JONES: Yeah, Hewson, and I've never seen a guy who made a bigger ass out of himself just so the fans will like him. PLEASE! FRANK WARBURTON: Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the ANNIVERSARY ASSAULT! The following contest is scheduled for one fall, with no time limit, and it is for the NAPW Television Championship! In this corner, he is the former Television Champion, from Chicago, Illinois weighing in at two hundred and five pounds! JEFF! JAAAAMEEES! James just raises his arms in the air and soaks in the boos. FRANK WARBURTON: And his opponent, from Toronto, Ontario, weighing in at two hundred and sixty-five pounds, he is the NAPW Television and Provincial Champion, THE YEEELOWWWW CHIIIICKKEN! The crowd pops big again as Yellow Chicken starts to dance! The two competitors walk to the center of the ring and look each other square in the eye. RIGHT HAND from James, right off of YC's skull. YC fires a shot right back, and the two exchange blows until James blocks one and feeds YC a boot! ENZIGURI! Yellow Chicken to the mat, Jeff James waists no time in going for his standing moonsault...no one home! Chicken is up, behind James and pulls off a nice belly to back suplex. Keeping with his tried and true strategy against James, Yellow Chicken goes after the shoulder from the get-go to keep him on the mat. KNEE DROP to the shoulder! Another one! YC places the arm of James on the bottom rope, and goes for a Bret Hart style butt stomp using the ropes for leverage...James gets up, and grabs YC from behind! Rolling Prawn Hold! ONE! TW- Strong kick out from the champ! Chicken gathers himself and shoots a jab to James' chest, and then grabs his arm for an arm wringer! He cinches it in, but James easily rolls forward, CORKSCREWS, and ends up in Hurrancarana position! FACE BUSTER BY JAMES! James nips up, and bounces off the second rope...CANNONBALL SENTON! BILL HEWSON: My goodness, look at this offensive barrage from James! JACK JONES: Yeah, reminds me of...me! Well, in my young days. BILL HEWSON: (sarcastic) No wonder you won "high flier of the year." Jeff James is controlling this match, his aerial offense is really giving the Champion problems in the early going. JACK JONES: Yellow Chicken can't let James fight the way he wants to fight, he has to keep him grounded. YC gets to his feet, and dodges a front roundhouse from James. A Russian Leg Sweep follows, and now YC has some time to pick apart that shoulder! He picks James up, performs another arm wringer, and then flips him forward while hanging on to the arm. Leg Drop! Right on the shoulder, well placed move by the champ. YC picks him up again, and Irish whips him into the ropes...KNEE LIFT! RIGHT TO THE SHOULDER! What elevation from YC! James nips up once more, and manages to sidekick YC in the stomach! Standing Double Underhook...INTO AN OVERHEAD SUPLEX! JACK JONES: Look at power on James! He just threw the much bigger Yellow Chicken right over his head! YC gets up, that was an impressive show of strength from James. The two square up, and get locked up in a collar and elbow tie-up...James sneaks in a elbow to the face! YC right back with an elbow of his own, but James with a spinning back elbow, a reverse roaring elbow! YC is stunned, and stumbles back! James grabs the taller man's shoulder, leaps up and dropkicks him in the chest! He flips in the air, landing on his feet as the TV champion lands in a heap. James off the ropes, and he charges at the fallen champion vertically rather than horizontally. He takes off right around YC's feet, tucks his legs in and spins around, eggie style...but MISSES when he tries to land a leg drop! YC back up now and he clotheslines James over the tope rope, and the two land awkwardly onto the floor. Sharplin is being very lenient with the count, and the competitors get up slowly. BILL HEWSON: This is the champion's advantage, James can't win the title this way and Yellow Chicken can't lose it! JACK JONES: That's why he's gotta get that mohawked psycho back into the ring! James slides in at a six count, and YC quickly follows. They didn't even brawl outside of the ring, instead allowing each other to get back in. They want to see who's the better WRESTLER, indeed! Snap suplex on James! YC stomps on the shoulder a few times, and then applies a rear side shoulder wrench! He pulls back, and James cries out! They're close to the ropes, James able to grab the bottom one. YC breaks his hold and quickly gets up, waiting for a rising James to turn around into a Fireman's carry power slam. Nicely done, YC tries to follow with an elbow drop but gets nothing but MAT, the two men bounce back up and James hits a superb arm drag. Yellow Chicken gets up and hits his own in turn, followed by another nip up from James, who presses on and manages to pull off a Wrap-Around DDT! Cover! ONE! TWO! KICK OUT! He's gonna need to do more than that! James slings himself up to the top rope, bounces off split-legged - that's a a page right out of RVD's book. Split-Legged Moonsault on YC! James, perhaps unwisely, tries to show off some of the submission holds he claims to have learned recently. He puts his opponent into a modified STF, and really just does it for show and to rest, as he doesn't seem to be doing much damage here. BILL HEWSON: What the hell is James doing? Does he want the title or not? You're not gonna submit a guy like Yellow Chicken, he's a mat master! JACK JONES: Exactly! James wants to win Chicken's way, make him tap out. How embarassing would it be if Yellow Chicken was the one who had to tap out? James hasn't forgotten how he lost the TV Title in the first place --- BILL HEWSON: Yellow Chicken with a roll-up! One, two, kick out by the challenger! Yellow Chicken rolled to his side and trapped James in a pin, forcing him to relinquish the hold. Smart move by the vet. James laces into him with a boot to the side as he fights to get up, but he eventually gets to his feet! YC with a right hand to the face --- DUCKED by James when he pulls off a split. From that position James spins around and connects with a Leg Sweep, and he quickly springs up and hits his Standing Moonsault into a double knee drop to complete the devastating combo! James gets up and does a little taunting, not focused enough on the match, or on the COBRA CLUTCH BOMB he just got nailed with from behind! Where do these guys find the energy to continue after so much punishment? The crowd is really into it now, cheering for their man, the Yellow Chicken! YC tries to apply a Leg Choke, pulling James' arm though and grabbing it, but James manages to squirm around and then flip forward for a pin! But YC is able to react quickly enough to push his weight forward and put James into a pin of his own! ONE, TWO, KICK OUT! James looks surprised, but he quickly goes back on the offensive. An knee smash to the gut of the TV champ softens him up, and from there it's a well-executed brainbuster to the mat! BILL HEWSON: That was a top notch suplex! Look out here, James isn't done! ASAI MOONSAULT! NO! The champ gets his knee up and blocks it! JACK JONES: Desperation counter pays off for YC, but for how long? Sharplin counts, and the two men try to will themselves up. Both get up simultaneously at a sloooow seven, but YC seems to be more aware of his surroundings and PECKS James in the head! James puts his hands over his face, groaning in pain! YC struts around the ring, doing the chicken dance and getting the crowd into it! And they go CRAZY! YC turns his attention back to his opponent and rips out a belly-to-belly suplex. Cover here! ONE! TWO! TWO AND A HALF! YC thought he had it, but gets back to work. Handstand knee drop onto the shoulder of Jeff James! BILL HEWSON: The Yellow Chicken just taking James apart methodically now, what a great clash of styles we're seeing here. YC is getting winded, and this gives James time to get back to his feet. He knees YC to the gut yet again, and then shoots him into the ropes. He leapfrogs his taller opponent, and then bounces off the adjacent ropes and catches a rebounding YC napping with a Facebuster/Bulldog variant, slamming his face off the mat! James again tries to apply a submission, but is countered once more by Yellow Chicken and is the victim of a textbook double leg takedown. YC gets quickly to his feet, but James is somehow already up and going for a backslide! COUNTERED BY YC! He hoists James up! 11:52, the crucifix powerbomb! JACK JONES: Stick a fork in him, he's done! ONE! TWO! THREE! FOOT? JACK JONES: Jeff James with his foot on the rope, this thing ain't over yet! YC rolls outside to catch his breath, but wastes valuable time he could have spent finishing off James. Once he's back in, James is ready! Discus Lariat! Knocks the champ back! James with a headbutt of his own, followed with a vicious superkick! James flies up the turnbuckle. BILL HEWSON: 630! 630! 630! What a splash! Cover one! TWO! THRE- NO! KICK OUT! JACK JONES: What is it going to take to get a three-count in this match? The fans are louder than they've ever been for Yellow Chicken, and the adrenalin from the crowd helps him fight to his feet! A quick series of lefts leaves James listless! He can't believe that YC kicked out and is already up! He throws a weak punch. YC CATCHES IT! OH MY! CROSS FACE! CROSS FACE! BILL HEWSON: He caught James in no man's land, right in the middle of the ring! JACK JONES: James has gotta break the hold or tap out! James is squirming...and fighting...but he CAN'T break it. YC pulls back even harder, and we can see James is starting to go limp! Finally, he can take no more and... HEWSON and JONES: WAIT! With one forceful thrust, JAMES ESCAPES! JACK JONES: He'd have to be frickin' Houdini to pull that off! Yellow Chicken is stunned! He follows with a powerful Release German Suplex, sending James crashing to the mat. YC is spent, and needs time to recover on the mat. The two men both manage to get up again, and this time it's James with a JAMES EFFECT! JAMES EFFECT! BILL HEWSON: OH MY GAAAADDD! COVER! ONE! TWO! THRE- Yellow Chicken has his hand on the ropes. JACK JONES: Incredible, I've never seen anything like this! Wait yes I have, every time these two get in the ring with one another! The NAPW faithful are all on their feet, clapping to show their appreciation to the men in the ring, much like they did at Hostile Hangover. BILL HEWSON: Neither man has anything left, I think the next big move will end it! Shaplin is counting, neither man has gotten up. He's at six, and they're stirring. James is on his knees, his arms wrapped around the middle rope. He pulls himself up, but LOOK OUT BEHIND! BILL HEWSON: GERMAN SUPLEX! UNBELIEVEABLE IMPACT, I'VE NEVER SEEN ONE SO STIFF IN MY LIFE! BRIDGE COVER! ONE! TWO! THRE- NO! JUST TWO! At the LAST POSSIBLE SPLIT-SECOND James got a shoulder up off the mat! Yellow Chicken is dazed, James' upper torso slammed down on his forehead pretty hard. Chicken takes some deep breaths, wondering what it's going to take... he starts to pick James up off the mat but... INSIDE CRADLE! ONE! TWO! ...THREEEEEE! FRANK WARBURTON: Here is your winner... and NEWWWWW TELEVISION CHAMPIONNNNN! JEFF JAAAAAAMES! BILL HEWSON: MY GOODNESS, THAT MAY BE THE BEST TV TITLE MATCH YOU WILL EVER SEE! JEFF JAMES WINS A THRILLER! JACK JONES: Hewson, you're gonna have a heart attack. That match was insane, I still can't believe what I just saw! Inside the ring... both men are still down, chests heaving as they try to gulp air back into their systems. The match has taken a physical toll on two great competitors. Slowly, Jeff James rolls over. Chicken begins to rise. Both men begin to take their feet, rising... and standing in front of one another. No words are exchanged, Chicken disappointed that he lost his "little chickadee"... Jeff James looks like hell warmed over. Finally, Chicken sticks out his hand. The two share a brief handshake before Yellow Chicken picks up the Provincial Championship and leaves James in the ring to celebrate. The ref hands an exhausted Jeff James the NAPW Television Championship. He clutches it in his arms, and holds it in tight! The crowd applauds it all... BILL HEWSON: A great show of sportsmanship from a great champion, The Yellow Chicken! This feud will go down in NAPW history, Jack Jones. JACK JONES: You're right about that, but we've got a new TV Champion here tonight. The first of TWO victories for the Royal Foundation. BILL HEWSON: We'll see that one later tonight. The Royal Foundation, Prince Darko & Thomas Young, will meet "Big Bad" Brian Bruno and the mysterious "Mr. Canada" in a tag team grudge match. JACK JONES: Mysterious? Oh come on Hewson, Mr. Canada's identity is totally obvious! BILL HEWSON: Well, maybe you could let us in on his secret. JACK JONES: You're putting me on, right? This is a put-on. BILL HEWSON: I have no idea what you mean. Wrestling fans, I am pleased to announce that a former NAPW star will be making his return this November. We have a special video package just for that... take a look. Latino pride. High-flyin' action. Froggy splash! And of course, the finisher... Crossbones! Odelay! Pure Honor is about to get a shot of TECHNIQUE. The street luchadore returns to NAPW November 2006! It's Technique's time, viva la raza!
JACK JONES: Just keep him away from my wallet. BILL HEWSON: Will you be serious?
"Driver's High" by Larc En Ciel begins booming through the speakers.. The crowd pops as Dez Carter makes his way to the ring. He slides in and hits the corner, the crowd pops once more. FRANK WARBURTON: Introducing second! Weighing in at two-hundred and twenty-eight pounds... From Greensboro, North Carolina... David Banks! "They Wanna Know" by Obie Trice starts playing.. David Banks comes out to a cheering crowd. He makes his way to the ring, head bobbing to the music. He slides in, eying Dez Carter before ascending the corner to taunt. He drops down and Henry Andrews gets both men to shake hands The bell sounds and both men begin circling each other.. David Banks urging his opponent to make a room. Dez Carter trying to keep his cool. David Banks mouths a few words - possibly about Asuka - and Carter pounces like a wild man. David Banks sidesteps but Dez clips Davids knee and sends him onto the floor. Dez Carter recuperates and leaps atop David Banks locking in a headlock. The downed David Banks begins lifting himself up in attempt to reverse the hold, but Dez Carter keeps his weight on him.. David Banks trying frantically to not fall, he slowly makes it up to one knee. Bulldog takes David Banks down. Dez Carter scans his opponent and stomps David Banks knee. Another stop and David begins screaming. Elbow Drop onto the leg. Dez is going for a figure four! But David Banks counters it. A kick to the rear of Dez Carter. It sends him stumbling forward and gives David Banks valuable time to recover. Both men get to their feet and a collar elbow tie up is initiated. David Banks gets the advantage and a hard snap suplex takes Dez Carter to the mat. David Banks keeps the momentum and hooks the leg. One! Two! Kickout! David Banks quickly attacks and a few clubbing forearms immobilize Dez Carter. David Banks lifts him to his feet and delivers a painful knee to the ribs. That took the wind out of Dez, and now Banks hits him with a German Suplex! Banks pops the hips... a second German Suplex... once more with feeling! Yet another German Suplex! David Banks goes for another cover. One! Two! Shoulder up! David Banks seems shocked and slaps the face of Dez Carter... Kick to the skull! By Dez Carter, David Banks wobbles for a moment before crashing down onto the mat. Dez Carter makes it to his feet and the crowd has gone wild. BILL HEWSON: We're seeing a lot of attitude from young David Banks tonight, that was an outright slap to the face of the former Pure Honor champion. JACK JONES: I like it! I like it a lot, that's the kind of attitude that makes a winner, and me? I like winners. BILL HEWSON: You must hate yourself, then. JACK JONES: I --- hey! Dez drops down for the cover. One! Two! Kickout! Dez Carter delivers a hard Palm Strike to the face of David Banks. He proceeds to lift him to his feet and deliver a hard kick to his ribs and follows up with a devastating Dragon Suplex. Another pin attempt! One! Two Threeee...Shoulder up! Dez Carter lifts David Banks to his feet, but gets caught with a shot to the gut. Snap suplex from Banks, followed up by an elbow drop to the sternum. He takes a moment to catch his breath, then lifts Dez to his feet and delivers a deadly knife edge chop! One more! David Banks hits three more, sending Dez Carter reeling into the ropes. He grabs hold of Dez Carter... Irish Whip, David Banks hits the ropes... Shining Yakuza Kick! It nearly beheads Dez Carter, David Banks scrambles for a cover! One! Two! Threee... Kickout! David Banks is outraged, he grabs Dez Carter and knees him in the chest, lifts him to his feet and irish whips him hard into the ropes for a Back Body Drop --- COUNTERED. A fierce kick to the chest sends David Banks into a world of hurt. Dez Carter spins behind Banks and drops him with a Back Suplex. Dez Carter then begins stomping on the knee of David Banks. With every stomp comes agonizing screams from David Banks. Dez Carter flips David to his stomach, grabs hold of his leg, quickly lifts and drives it into the mat. BILL HEWSON: Great move by Dez Carter, constantly working on the knee of David Banks! JACK JONES: Dez Carter is a monster out there! David Banks doesn't deserve this kind of shoddy treatment. Dez Carter lifts David Banks to his feet, it's time for the Tiger (driver) --- Reversed, Back Body Drop! David Banks stumbles forward, he grabs onto the ropes to keep himself standing. Dez Carter makes it to his feet... Kick to the back of David's knee. David collapses, Dez Carter grabs him by the head and pulls him to his feet. Hard kick to the front of his knee, it buckles and he crashes down to the mat once again. Dez Carter thinks for a moment and proceeds to lock in the Stretch Plum. David Banks screaming in agony, Henry Andrews constantly asking if he wants to submit. Banks begins to struggle, using every bit of strength in his body... He begins to crawl forward... Inching his way closer to the ropes... FRANK WARBURTON: David Banks has used his first rope break! Dez Carter lets go of the move but refuses to give David Banks time to recover. He drops a knee to the back of David Banks. It sends him into a minor convulsion and Dez Carter drops another knee to the spine. David Banks is using the ropes to pull himself up... Dez Carter hits the ropes... Clothesline! Ducked! Dez Carter rebounds and... knocks into Henry Andrews! JACK JONES: That's a disqualification right there! He hit the ref! BILL HEWSON: It was an accident, Hewson, and you know, it almost looked like Henry Andrews moved himself INTO Dez Carter's path... In the ring, Banks is up --- and this time Carter DESTROYS him with a huge Burning Lariat! Carter makes the cover, the crowd chants "one, two, three"... but there's no referee! The ref is down! Asuka screams, Carter slaps the mat in frustration. He gets up and goes over to Andrews, trying to revive him. The man seems knocked clean out though... BILL HEWSON: Well, Andrews seems legitimately hurt, we may need some medical attention --- hey wait a minute! David Banks just pulled something out of his tights! Is that --- that's a steel chain! And he just wrapped it around his fist! Wait just a damned minute --- JACK JONES: Knuckleball special, Hewson! POW. Carter turns around and eats steel fist right to the face. He goes down and immediately Banks covers. Henry Andrews IMMEDIATELY comes to life and slaps the mat crisply for ONETWOTHREE. Andrews calls for the bell as David Banks celebrates his win. The crowd are shocked at what they've just seen! FRANK WARBURTON: The winner of the match and number one contender to the Kiniski Cup... David Bannnnks! BILL HEWSON: But wait a minute --- Andrews was down! He looks fine and dandy now... David Banks cheated! This is Pure Honor! This man should be ashamed! Jack Jones: Win if you can, lose if you must, but always cheat! Bill Hewson: That's rich, this is Pure Honor... Henry Andrews has been the subject of controversial officiating regarding North T. Gunderson, what the hell is going on here? That's what Asuka wants to know. The pint-size firebug is on the apron yelling at Andrews, demanding to know what is going on. Andrews shakes his head, telling Asuka to mind her business. "I'm the referee, I do my job." Carter doesn't agree, spinning Andrews around. "That was crap, Andrews, and you know it!" "I did my job! You're lucky I didn't disqualify you right there!" "YOU got in the way UGHHH" The "UGHHH" comes from Dez Carter when David Banks returns to the ring and lowblows the man! Banks ... and Henry Andrews leave the ring, walking up the aisle together. Banks walks backwards, looking on the ring with a cocky grin, oblivious to the boos of the crowd. Asuka is kneeled over her man. Carter's face a mask of pain as he holds his groinal muscles. At the top of the ramp, Andrews turns and raises David Banks arm high in the air, then the two exit through the curtain. BILL HEWSON: Explain to me what I just saw here. Henry Andrews and David Banks seem damn chummy to me, like they're in cahoots. JACK JONES: Hey, David Banks was just protecting Henry Andrews from that Dez Carter's temper. Can't blame the man for staying near David. BILL HEWSON: Something stinks in the Pure Honor division. Dez Carter just got screwed out of his win... a damn shame.
BILL HEWSON: David Banks is the new #1 one contender to the Kiniski Cup. The champion of that division will be decided later tonight. But now ladies and gentlemen, it is time to induct our first wrestler into the NAPW Ring of Prestige! Let's go to Frank Warburton. FRANK WARBURTON: It is my pleasure to introduce to you, the next addition to the NAPW Ring of Prestige class of 2006. He hails from Las Vegas, Nevada. He is a former NAPW Heavyweight, Provincial and Tag Team Champion! This... Is... "The Future" Chris Casino! "Smooth" by Rob Thomas & Santana pulses through the PA system and the fans come to their feet. From the back emerges the man himself, Chris Casino with his manager Raul Havok in tow. Both men are dressed in Armani suits and despite his profound hatred for Canadians, the crowd gives Chris a nice round of applause. Jack Jones is, of course, on his feet giving a standing ovation. JACK JONES: Come on Hewson, stand up! You are in the presence of GREATNESS! Chris Casino, back in an NAPW ring! Casino makes his way to the ring and Raul Havok opens the ring ropes for him. He steps into the ring and flashes the crowd a genuine smile. Chris takes the microphone from Frank and looks out at the capacity crowd. Some are booing, others cheering. A sign in the crowd reads "Chris owes me $20!" CHRIS CASINO: I dunno what's worse. Being inducted into the Ring of Prestige with the likes of The Dudes & Static...Or having the ceremony take place here in Canada! Here come the boos. Casino laughs and starts to pace slowly around the ring. CHRIS CASINO: Later tonight I'm going to prove to not only that moron Static who the "real" triple crown champion is, but I'll prove it to all of you dirty Canadians. More boos. Casino however seems to be in his element. CHRIS CASINO: But...As weird as it sounds. I feel truly honored to be here tonight. Several months ago, NAPW & myself parted under less than friendly circumstances and now? Now I get the chance to come back for one night only and say...Thank you. Thank you for supporting me, thank you for booing me, thank you for letting me call you names week in and week out. Some of the boos now turn to appreciative cheers. CHRIS CASINO: As honored as I am to be inducted into the NAPW Ring of Prestige, and make no mistakes it is a huge honor, I can't help but reflect on all that I've done over the last year. Not only did I become a triple crown champion in this company, but I helped make NAPW the super power that is it today. Without me NAPW would have never been graced with the talents of Evan Cartwright, Devastation, Pit Boss, Chopper & Heat, Stein and others. Then again I'm also responsible for dragging in retards like William Shatner, Bob Barker & Doctor....Dr. Tittylover so maybe I shouldn't brag to much huh? This gets Casino some laughs. CHRIS CASINO: No one else in the class of 2006 has done more for NAPW than me. No other athlete in this company can hold a candle to what I've accomplished. They might not admit it in the back, but this place hasn't been the same without me. I set the bar for the quote, unquote, heels of NAPW. I showed everyone in NAPW that I was willing to do anything and everything to win any match I was in. Hell, I even created the now inaugural Canadian Cup tournament! The point is, without me NAPW would have been a much boring place to be in. Without my show stealing matches against the likes of D!, "Sick" Billy Kryenik & Evan Cartwright, NAPW wouldn't be where they're at now. Casino starts to get some boos again. Like he cares. CHRIS CASINO: To everyone that has ever had the guts to face me in this ring, I tip my hat to you. To the guys who actually pinned me in this ring you'll forever have my respect. To this company that let me come back for this one night and say "good-bye" in the fashion I wanted, I can only say Thank you. It is my honor to be inducted with the likes of Rex Caliber & "Ill" Bill. Oh Hell, I'm even honored to stand next to men like The Dudes and Static. This gets the crowd back on his good side. CHRIS CASINO: To all the young kids in the back watching this and listening to me talk I want you guys to look at the people who have come before you. We set the standard, now it's up to you to raise the bar. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for inducting me into the Ring of Prestige. This means more than any title belt ever could. And that...Is something you dirty Canadians can bank on! Casino hands the microphone to Raul Havok and raises his arms above his head as the crowd gives him grudging respect...
TIFFANY: Cam! Mike! Oh my God it's so good to see you! Hugs all around. It seems that whatever has happened in the past, there's no bad blood here. TIFFANY: Congratulations, by the way, on tonight! Are... are you dressing like that for the ceremony? CAMERON SCOTT: Hey, Tiff, the fans wanted the Dudes in their hall of fame... MIKE JOHNSTON: And so tonight, they're going to see the Dudes as they are. No tuxedos. No excessive grooming. Just Mike and Cam, as they remember them! TIFFANY: (Grinning despite herself.) Same old boys. It's good to see you haven't changed. MIKE JOHNSTON: Well... not much anyway. Neither of us are cleared to wrestle, so we've been loafing around. A lot. Look... Tiff, it's been great catching up, but we've got to go get ready! TIFFANY:Sure thing. And good luck tonight! Mike and Cam saunter off. Tiffany goes to leave, when Cam returns and catches her by the arm. CAMERON SCOTT:Tiffany, wait a sec. When you left us, all those months ago, you said it was because we lacked focus... TIFFANY: Cam... I didn't mean anything personally... I just... CAMERON SCOTT: No. It's cool. It's just... you were right. We DID lack focus. Maybe if we'd taken your advice a little more serious... well, maybe we'd still be wrestling. Cam rubs his neckbrace. Tiffany gives him a hug. TIFFANY: Good luck out there tonight Cam. The two part ways, and we cut back to the action. Jack Jones is - as per usual - in the middle of some outrageous story.
BILL HEWSON: I bet that was uncomfortable in the morning! But we're back! Tonight is a night all about remembering our first spectacular year, and what better way to do that then to see some of our alumni wrestlers return one more time for the fans! JACK JONES: Damn straight Hewson! Many of our industry's up-and-coming stars have passed through our halls, and a few of them are here tonight! Cue "Believe Me" and the crowd cheers! THE CRUSHER, steps out from behind the curtain, a smile playing on his face, and nods to the crowd before making his way down to the ring! JACK JONES: Wait... The Crusher!? Damn, I though Chris Casino's match was next! Scratch that 'up-and-comers' remark in post! BILL HEWSON: We're live, you dolt! The Crusher takes his time, enjoying the cheers of the crowd, then steps into the ring. He shakes hands with both Frank Warburton and referee Morgan Smythe before turning once more to the crowd and raising his arms. The smile remains, but The Crusher's posture shows that he's here tonight to wrestle! BILL HEWSON: The Crusher, of course, hasn't been with the NAPW since the summer... but from the sounds of the fans, no one has forgotten him! Welcome home Crusher! Lynyrd Skynyrd & Kid Rock blast over the sound system with "Gimmie Back My Bullets", and the crowd rises to it's feet! You almost can't hear the music as J.C. COOK hurtles out of the back and stands, for a moment, basking in the love of the crowd! BILL HEWSON: J.C. Cook! He's been out since January due to injury, but he's back and ready for one more match with NAPW! Cook runs around the barricade, glad-handing everyone and anyone, then turns and slides into the ring. He, too, shakes hands with Warburton and Smythe. Tonight, it seems, neither of these men is a 'babyface' or a 'heel'. It's two phenominal athletes, here for the fans. And the fans clearly appreciate it. FRANK WARBURTON: Ladies and gentlemen, it is time for the first of our ALUUUMNNNI MATCHES! First, from Riverside, California; and weighing in at TWO-HUNDRED and SEVENTY four pounds... he is the FIRST EVER Television Champion... THE CRUUUUUUSHHHHHER! Crusher raises his arms again and the crowd cheers! A lot of love here tonight. FRANK WARBURTON: And his opponent... Warburton is cut off by an IMMEDIATE pop. Cook grins ear-to-ear, hops up to the second rope at the corner and raises his arms, feeding the crowd further. Warburton presses ahead, trying to be heard over the crowd. FRANK WARBUTON: From Kenosha, Wisconsin; and weighing in at TWO-HUNDRED and THRITY nine pounds... he is the one... the only... J. C. COOOOOOOOK! The crowd is chanting "Cook! Cook! Cook!" Cook hops off the turnbuckle as Warburton exits the ring, and turns to face The Crusher. Crusher is now all business, and Cook nods, shaking out his arms, and hunkering down. There's the bell! The first NAPW Alumni Match is under way! The two men meet in the middle of the ring and begin circling each other. Theres a tense moment, then Cook turns to the crowd and earns himself another cheap pop! The crowd loves this guy! KICK TO THE BACK from Crusher! Maybe the former Television Champ is getting a little jealous? JACK JONES: You don't turn your back on your opponent, even for a second! J.C. Cook was ASKING for that! The crowd, to their credit, don't boo Crusher for the cheap shot, and the former champ presses his advantage as Cook cluthces his back in pain. Crusher grabs Cook, and whips him hard to the ropes. Cook rebounds, only to be scooped up and PLANTED with a stiff Belly-to-Belly suplex! The Crusher is in good form tonight. BILL HEWSON: The Crusher is in good form tonight! JACK JONES: Whoa! BILL HEWSON: What? JACK JONES: I just got deja vu when you said that! Cook scrambles away from The Crusher, trying to stop the larger man's momentum, but Crusher catches him and hauls him up. Toe kick from Crusher doubles over Cook... Crusher hooks the head, Cook goes up... WAIT FOR IT... Suplex! And a cover from the former TV Champ! One! Two! And a kickout at two! JACK JONES: Leave it to J.C. Cook to have the worst comeback in history. Crusher hauls up a clearly dazed Cook and whips him into the corner. Cook hangs there... and Crusher is calling for the Crusher Effect! This match could be over! He turns to charge... only to have his legs taken out by a desperate, diving J.C. Cook! Crusher topples as Cook scrambles to his feet... and drops an elbow on Crushers's head! And again! Cook pulls Crusher to his feet and whips HIM into the Corner... FUZZY SPLASH! Crusher spits into the air and falls flat on his face! J.C. Cook turns him over... One! Two! And Crusher gets his foot on the ropes! The crowd applauds wildly! BILL HEWSON: No one wants to see this match done yet! And these two men are just getting started! Cook pops up while Crusher staggers to his feet using the ropes... Cook catches the former Champ from behind with a full-nelson! Crusher shakes his head and tries to power out, but Cook PLANTS him with the Full-Nelson Slam! And another cover! One, Two, Kickout! Cook pounds the mat in disappointment! JACK JONES: Temper, temper! Cook turns to Crusher only to have the All-American to NAIL him with a left! Cook shakes it off and responds with his own left hook! Crusher responds in kind! Then Cook! Crusher! Cook! Crusher! Cook! Crusher! Crusher! CRUSHER! DDT! Cook is hangs on the top of his head for just a moment, then crashes to the mat! Crusher goes for a cover, but Cook immediately puts a foot on the ropes! Crusher shrugs, and hauls Cook to his feet instead. TOE KICK! Crusher doubles over in surprise... IMPLANT DDT! Now it's The Crusher's turn to crash into the mat! Cook hooks the leg! One! Two! Thrrrnokickout! So close! The crowd is cheering! BILL HEWSON: The crowd is deafening! I don't know if they even care who wins! Cook has pulled Crusher to his feet, and whips him into the corner again! He's calling for a second Fuzzy Splash! He charges... and NOBODY'S HOME! Crusher dodges at the last second and Cook crashes into the top turnbuckle! He clutches his chest in pain and staggers back... into a BACKBREAKER from Crusher! Cook goes down over the knee backwards, then pops back up and stumbles forward into the turnbuckle! He turns around in time to see Crusher CHARGE! CRUSHER EFFECT! INTO AN EMPTY CORNER POST! The former TV champ clutches his shoulder and staggers back... PRESSURE COOKER! Cook hooks the leg! One! Two! THREE! The crowd is on it's feet! FRANK WARBURTON: Here is the winner of the first NAPW Alumni Match... J. C. COOOOOOK! BILL HEWSON: Cook wins! J.C. Cook has won, and the crowd is GOING WILD! Cook acknowledges the crowd, then extends a hand to a disappointed Crusher. Crusher looks up, smirks, and accepts Cook's help to his feet! The crowd cheers all the louder as the two men exchange a nod and a firm handshake, then Crusher waves one last time to the crowd and slides out of the ring to give Cook his moment. BILL HEWSON: What respect between two phenominal wrestlers! JACK JONES: I'll hand it to them, Bill Hewson. It was a great match. J.C. Cook turns to the crowd with a grin... and then the LIGHTS GO OUT! BILL HEWSON: What the hell!? JACK JONES: Did the U of A forget to pay the power bill!? There's a moment of confusion, then the lights come back up and... HOLY HELL! IT'S MISERY! The madman who put J.C. Cook on the injured list for three months is IN THE RING! The crowd's cheers have turned to SCREAMS and BOOS as Misery just UNLEASHES a barrage of stiff punches right into Cook's head! BILL HEWSON: What the hell!? Where did HE come from!? JACK JONES: Well it IS Halloween, Hewson! Cook staggers under Misery's attack, and the psycho laughs as each blow rains down! Why is no one coming to Cook's aid! Where did Crusher go!? Cook, busted open, staggers into a DOUBLE ARM DDT! Cook is LAID OUT! Misery cackles with glee and slides out of the ring! Fans begin pelting him with popcorn and bottles, but he just laughs all the harder and marches to the time keeper's table. He grabs a steel chair and holds it aloft with sick triumph! BILL HEWSON: NO! NOT LIKE THIS! THIS IS J.C. COOK'S NIGHT, YOU BASTARD! JACK JONES: It looks like Misery has come tonight to finish what he started last year! Misery slids back into the ring, where Cook is desperately using the ropes to retake his feet! Weilding the chair, he lunges... VAN DAMINATOR FROM COOK! Right in Misery's face! Cook is coming alive, and the crowd is behind him 100%! Misery shakes off the attack, and rises to meet Cook... TOE KICK! PRESSURE COOKER! ONTO THE CHAIR! JACK JONES: GOOD GOD! Misery might be DEAD! Cook rolls over the limp psychopath and hooks the leg! The crowd is on it's feet as he calls for a count! Morgan Smythe shrugs and hits the mat! One! TWO! THREE! The crowd is going NUTS as Cook uses his foot to roll Misery out of the ring, shaking his head with a smirk! Vindication, at long last, is his! BILL HEWSON: YES! YES! He BEAT that sicko! JACK JONES: What a night, Bill Hewson! BILL HEWSON: What a night for J.C. Cook! What a night for the NAPW! And I have a feeling that we're in for a few more surprises before it's all over! J.C. Cook has taken a corner and his standing tall atop the ringpost for the crowd who is again chanting "Cook! Cook! Cook!" Words can't describe the look on his face... the look of a man who's come home one last time! The NAPW fans will miss him, and so will we... BILL HEWSON: Well that was certainly unexpected, but on his one-night-only return to NAPW, J.C. Cook apparently wins two straight. And almost one YEAR after the fact... Misery finally got what was coming to him! JACK JONES: How does this happen? I just lost a ton of money, Hewson! BILL HEWSON: Let me get this straight. You bet against Cook? JACK JONES: Oh God yes. BILL HEWSON: ...Twice? JACK JONES: Well I figured that while he was here, somebody would want to pad their record... BILL HEWSON: No wonder you're so unpopular at christmas. Ladies and gentlemen, this January, NAPW presented JOKER'S WILD live from the Bacaratt Casino here in Edmonton. Let's take a look back at one of the wildest events in NAPW history.
Back to live action again. Suddenly some music kicks up! Music you say? How's it go? "I'm a dude, he's a dude, she's a dude, we're all Dudes!" Less Than Jake plays to the ring the Sultans of Slack... hell, no tuxedos here, still in their casual clothes: Cam Scott in an Eskimos jersey, Johnston in a bowling shirt. The crowd pops huge for the return of the fan favorites! FRANK WARBURTON: Ladies and gentlemen, the next inductions into the NAPW Ring Of Prestige Class of 2006... Former NAPW Tag Team Champions Michael K. Johnston... Cameron Scott... they are THE DUUUUDES! The Dudes hit the ring and high-five. Their music cuts out, but the crowd is still SO LOUD. "Welcome back! Welcome back! We have missed you! We have missed you!" The Dudes look overcome, rubbing their eyes. Frank hands them each a plaque and turns over the microphone before stepping out of the ring. The Dudes compose themselves, "Shhhing" the crowd comically. MIKE JOHNSTON: Thank you! Thank you all very much! CAMERON SCOTT: It's a great honour to be here! MIKE JOHNSTON: The Dudes were honoured to be members of the NAPW. We were given a great opportunity to help a young federation during one of it's most exciting times, and we embraced that opportunity. CAMERON SCOTT: We had some classic matches against some fantastically talented opponents, but for us, it was never about titles or accolades. It was about one thing... MIKE JOHNSTON: You! The fans! Cheap pop. The Dudes grin and wait for the crowd to settle. CAMERON SCOTT: We always wanted to put on the best show! We always wanted to be in the matches everyone talked about long after the lights went out, and you went home! MIKE JOHNSTON: Our careers were about entertaining the people who came out to see us. And we had a heck-of-a-lot of fun along the way! CAMERON SCOTT: Being chosen by you, our fans here in the NAPW, to be included in the first ever Ring of Legends induction ceremony, means so very much to us. It means that you all understood what we were about, and respected that. MIKE JOHNSTON: So, with that said, it is great pride that we accept our place amongst the first legends of the NAPW. You may never see the Dudes in action again... Sounds of dismay from the crowd, as Cam rubs his neck sadly. MIKE JOHNSTON: But the Dudes will always remember the NAPW fans, the BEST DAMN FANS IN THE WORLD! Another cheap pop. The Dudes grin as their music kicks back up. They go to the outside, high-fiving their adoring public and basking in the glow one more time. BILL HEWSON: Arguably the most popular tag team in NAPW history... it's good to see The Dudes, even just for one night. JACK JONES: Could they have at LEAST worn a nice shirt? I mean is that too much to ask? BILL HEWSON: Of The Dudes? JACK JONES: YES! BILL HEWSON: Probably. The next match this evening will be a Triple-Threat for the #1 contendership to the tag titles... Katy, bar the door, this one is going to get out of control!
Ringside. FRANK WARBURTON: The following contest is Triple Threat Tag Team match to decide the number one contenders for the NAPW Tag Titles and it will be contested with SUPERSTAR RULES! Introducing first and weighting in at total of FOUR-hundred and ninety-four pounds... Thomas Deathrow! Krusty Kid Paul! SEEEXXXXYYY ADOOORRRABLE DRRRUNKS! "Too Sexy" by Right Said Fred hits the speakers of Edmonton's Butterdome as "Superstar" Tommy Deathrow and Krusty Kid Paul make their way to the ring. The fans reactions are a mixed one for S.A.D. Deathrow and KKP enter the ring; both look ready for action and hungry for a shot at NAPW Tag Champions, The New and Improved D-X. BILL HEWSON: I can't say that I like these guys style, but you do have to admit that they are a couple of talented wrestlers. When they're not drunk or... well... JACK JONES: S.A.D are impressive. But they've got some competition tonight. STIFF competition. BILL HEWSON: Bravo, Jones. Really. FRANK WARBURTON: Making their way to the ring next, weighing in at a total combined weight of five-hundred and sixty-five pounds! The team of "The Scottish Wrecking Machine" Al Thoes and "The Irish Adonis" Bobby O'Brady...THE CELTIC ASSSSASINSSS! As The Celts walk out from behind the curtain, "The Devil in the Kitchen" by Ashley MacIssac hits the air waves. The crowd erupts as one of their favorite teams make the way to the ring. Deathrow and KKP exit the quickly as the Celtic Assassins climb the opposite corners and show respect to the crowd for their support. BILL HEWSON: The crowd is going nuts for Thoes and O'Brady, with good reason. These guys are tough and are my pick to take this thing JACK JONES: The Celts are horrible! These guys are going to prove to be punching bags for the other teams involved in this thing... FRANK WARBURTON: And their opponents, weighting in at a combined weight of five-hundred and seventeen pounds and being lead to the ring by Ol'Salty... they are Rod Hardway and "Durty" Dutch Flanagan, they are members of The Winner's Circle...STIIIFFFFF COMPETITION! As the fans prepare to boo the heels, they are surprised by what they hear. "Baddstreet USA" blares over the speakers. The crowd erupts as the sound of The Freebirds theme rattles their ear drums. But, when they see what walks out on the ramp, their attitude changes. Rod, with a Rebel Flag robe and face painted alla Michael PS Hayes and Dutch sporting a jacket and tights with that same flag, Buddy Roberts style, make their way to the ring... BILL HEWSON: Can you believe these two?! Disgracing one of the best Tag Team in wrestling history! JACK JONES: This is not a disgrace Bill, Stiff Competition are paying homage to the Freebirds. One of the best tag teams of our time, representing another. I love these guys, and I can see that they are going to walk away with the title shot tonight... Referee John Sharplin calls for the bell and this one is on... Hardway, KKP, and O'Brady start this one off and it looks like we're going to have a little double team action as Bobby and KKP turn their attention to Rod. O'Brady and Paul force the big man into the ropes double irish whip to the opposite side; double back body drop brings Hardway to the mat. KKP turns his attention to the downed Winner's circle member while O'Brady tags in Thoes. Thoes enters the ring slowly and watches on a little as KKP continues to deliver vicious kicks to Hardway. KKP finally stops the beating and raises his hands in victory, only to be dropped by a vicious clothesline from Al. Thoes now pulls Hardway off the mat and whips him to the Celts corner, following with another power clothesline. Thoes tags in Bobby, who delivers a hard knee to the gut, bring Rod to the mat again. By this time KKP is back to his feet, and grabs O'Brady from behind, turning him quickly to meet a stiff right from Paul. With O'Brady dazed from the punch, KKP folds Bobby in half with a quick boot and delivers a DDT. KKP then tags in the "Superstar." BILL HEWSON: This one has had a great start Jack! JACK JONES: You're right Bill, but it would be nice to see a little more positive action from my boys, Stiff Competition! BILL HEWSON: Well, looks like you're going to get what you asked for... While Deathrow and O'Brady tangle, Hardway is making his way to the corner and tags in Flanagan. Deathrow has come out on top of the grapple with Bobby and has thrown him to the outside. KKP jumps off the ring apron and attacks O'Brady and Thoes is quick to come to his partner's aid. Back in the ring, Tommy has no idea that Durty is in the ring. When he turns around he is face to face with Dutch. They lock up; Flanagan comes out on top, irish whip...NO!! SHORT CLOTHESLINE!! Deathrow is down, Dutch with the pin... kickout by the Superstar. BILL HEWSON: That was a vicious short clothesline, but it's going to take more than that to keep Tommy Deathrow down at this point in the match! JACK JONES: I got to agree with you for once Bill, it's early in this match... hell, they haven't even used weapons. Durty doesn't waste anytime and continues to attack Superstar. Flanagan pulls Tommy off the mat...SWINGING DDT! Flanagan to the ropes, looking for A ROLL IN THE MUD...NO! Tommy gets his knees up! Both Deathrow and Dutch are on the mat. Superstar crawling to his corner to make the tag, KKP isn't there to meet him, but O'Brady is...ATOMIC DROP! Deathrow is down and O'Brady heads for Flanagan, who is back to his feet! Bobby and Durty meet in the middle of the ring, O'Brady ducks a big punch attempt, Flanagan is back on to "The Irish Adonis" and he locks on a full nelson....FULL NELSON BOMB! O'Brady with the pin, Sharplin counts! One, two, th--- Hardway with the save after the big move from O'Brady. JACK JONES: Now that's teamwork! BILL HEWSON: Hardway saves this one for his team... and SAD, actually. The unique rules of this match-up mean that the first pinfall ends the match. A team can lose without being involved in the decision! Thoes now enters the ring and ties up with Hardway. They take there battle outside. Bobby is still working Flanagan, but now Tommy is back in the ring. O'Brady pushes Durty away and turns to Deathrow. Clothesline attempt from O'Brady is ducked by the Superstar. Deathrow off the ropes, and comes back with a flying forearm that drops Bobby. Tommy quickly locks on a Boston Crab and Sharplin is there to watch for the submission... BILL HEWSON: This could be it Jack! Tommy has that Boston Crab locked in tight! JACK JONES: O'Brady looks ready to quit... O'Brady, ready to tap at any moment...CHAIR SHOT BY ROD HARDWAY! Flanagan tagged in the big man while Deathrow was going for the submission win. O'Brady slowly making his way to the corner while Hardway grabs the shaken Deathrow. Tommy is being hoisted into the vertical suplex position...DROPPED ON THE STEEL CHAIR! Rod with the pin, one, two, no! BROKEN UP BY THE FRESH AL THOES! BILL HEWSON: Stiff Competition had this one won, but Thoes broke the pin! JACK JONES: Lousy Scottish jackass... Thoes and Hardway both lock up. The two big men struggling to come out on top of this, Thoes gets the edge and throws Hardway to the ropes, big POWER SLAM!! And the pin... Kickout at ONE? JACK JONES: You can't keep big Rod down with one move! Tommy has some how managed to tag KKP in and now all three men are exchanging punches... KKP NAILS THOES! THOES NAILS HARDWAY! HARDWAY NAILS KKP! A PAUSE... THE FANS CHEER! KKP AND THOES DROP HARDWAY! Thoes is laughing at Hardway's misfortune, distracted just long enough for KKP to take advantage. SPINE BUSTER ON THOES! Tommy has made it in to the ring now and they pick Thoes off the mat. SAD throw Al to the ropes, double clothesline ducked by Thoes, quick turn, and a stiff clothesline of his own puts both SAD members over the ropes. Thoes tags O'Brady and it looks like Hardway has done the same with Flanagan. They meet in the middle, but Flanagan is first to make a move...VICIOUS KICK TO THE SKULL! Followed with A ROLL IN THE MUD! IT CONNECTS! THE PIN! ONE! TWO!! THREE...NO! BROKEN UP BY THOES! All members of Stiff Competition and The Celtic Assassins are in the ring. Thoes is tied up with Hardway and O'Brady and Durty tangle in the corner. Thoes looks to have advantage of Hardway...VERTEBREAKER! Good Lord, he hit the Haggis Buster on the big man! BILL HEWSON: Now we have a two on one situation here... JACK JONES: This is not fair! Now both Celts are working over Flanagan. Thoes has Durty set up for another Vertebreaker, but O'Brady is heading to the top! BILL HEWSON: Looks like the Celts are calling for the Celtic Crusher JACK JONES: This move is disgusting!! YES! CELTIC CRUSHER! BILL HEWSON: This one is over! JACK JONES: Not like this! Deathrow, KKP, anybody! ONE! TWO! HERE COMES S.A.D. TO RUIN THE PARTY--- TOO LATE! THREE! FRANK WARBURTON: Here are your winners... and new Number One contenders to the tag team titles! THE CELTIC ASSASSINNNNNNS! SAD are too late, and the Celtic Assassins have their arms raised in victory! BILL HEWSON: Well, it was out of control like we said. Celtic Assassins will challenge for the NAPW Tag Team titles sometime soon... maybe this will be the shot they finally capture the gold. JACK JONES: I think it's a conspiracy, personally. But it's not like anybody ever listens to me. BILL HEWSON: Sorry, were you saying something? Ladies and gentlemen before we move on tonight... while order is restored out here... let's take a look back at NAPW's first SOLE SURVIVOR event. Check this out.
FRANK WARBURTON: Ladies and gentlemen the next Ring of Prestige honoree... "MORE HUMAN THAN HUMAN, SICKER THAN SICK!" The crowd explodes as Rex Caliber comes down the aisle. He looks to be in wrestling shape. He is in a tuxedo, and looks very happy to be here. Rex enters the ring. REX CALIBER: First off how the hell is EDMONTON TONIGHT? The crowd cheers. REX CALIBER: My cheap pop is out of the way... I'd like to thank my parents for having such an awesome son. I'd like to thank God for blessing me with the abilities that no other man possesses. Rex goes from smiling to almost teary eyed. REX CALIBER: When this deal got announced... I was happy to get honored. Then getting here at the building... I was loving being around the wrestlers. I saw the hunger in there eyes. This is one awesome card. The Superbowl of NAPW Wrestling... The Mecca! Rex sheds some tears. REX CALIBER: And... it breaks my heart to get this award and be here, and not wrestle. I want so much to perform one last time... for you fans. But my loss to Rees was my final match, as I'm not allowed to wrestle here, per Winchell. But even though you can't see ME wrestle... I'm sure everyone will get their moneys worth, just like I used to give you every night. THANK YOU FANS... FOR ALLOWING REX CALIBER TO GROW UP! Thank you from the bottom of my heart... I've took up to much time.. Let's get the action started again! Rex exits the ring, after kissing his plaque. The crowd rises to their feet giving him a heartfelt, standing ovation. "One more match! One more match! One more match!" Rex looks back out from the top of the aisle, raising both arms high... One last time. BILL HEWSON: Truly a class act, ladies and gentlemen. "The Nexus One" Rex Caliber, who I might add was run out of the company by our biased owner Joseph Winchell. It's just not good business to get rid of your top draw... JACK JONES: You can criticize the commish all you want, but R. Joseph Winchell... THE THIRD... has good reasons for everything he does. Rex Caliber was killing NAPW, even if you choose not to see it. BILL HEWSON: Oh shut the hell up. At least Rex could accept his Ring of Prestige induction. Good bye Rex Caliber... and Godspeed.
JACK JONES: Because of course, they all hate each other. BILL HEWSON: Besides two of them being retired? Pretty much. Our next match however, features some of NAPW's new crop of talent. The issue between the Royal Foundation and "Big Bad" Brian Bruno has gotten mighty personal. Let's look back at the feud. The time for talking ends tonight. The verbal war is over. The physical war has been waging for weeks. The Lethal Lottery set up a scenerio that truly defined the core of what the name symbolized. Brian Bruno was the odd man out, in a dangerous game of strength in numbers. The Royal Foundation laid him to waste that night... But Bruno would not let them go unpunished. A one man vigilante took on the Royal Foundation in singles matches, only to fall to the numbers game again. The brutally left Bruno bloody and no one came to help him. With an ultimatum, Bruno had no choice but to find a man that we could count on, and the NAPW roster isn't a real option. So Bruno went to the most respected hero in NAPW lore... Rex Caliber. Rex lead him to a man that no one knows, but somehow, someway Bruno trusts this man. The Royal Foundation can finish the job tonight, prove their dominance over Bruno... or be humbled by the ex football player and a hero for just one day! Demon Hunter's "Through the Black" pulsates throughout the Butterdome next, which can only mean one thing: it's time to get Royal. Prince Darko bounds from the back in a new, royal blue colored singlet and immediately steps back, pounding on the chest of his tag partner, Thomas Young, to hype him up. The crowd boos in a low murmur. Jeff James and Mr. B are nowhere to be seen. FRANK WARBURTON: The following tag-team contest is scheduled for ONE FALL! Now, making their way to the ring: NAPW's most monarchial tag team, they weigh in at a combined four-hundred fifty-five pounds... PRINCE DARKO and THOMAS YOUNG, the ROYYYALLL! FounDAAATION!! BILL HEWSON: Well, Jack Jones... we're about to see whether or not life truly goes on. Our next match should be a solid tag team contest, we've got four of the brightest young stars of NAPW coming to the ring in the Royal Foundation, Brian Bruno, and Mr. Canada. I just can't help but replay Rex Caliber's speech in mind over and over, though, Jack. The last match? He's given us so much! JACK JONES: ... wait, what?! You don't think there's anything fishy going on with Mr. Canada? Knowing all of Rex's moves, being Rex's best fri--- BILL HEWSON: Jack, will you be my shoulder to cry on?! JACK JONES: ---get off of me! You're being ridiculous! In the downtime, the Royals have gotten into the ring and mugged for the fans, drawing a more passionate ire. "Step Up" by Drowning Pool plays next, and the crowd gives a solid pop for the former New York Jet, "Big Bad" Brian Bruno. JACK JONES: Now, if you can wipe the tears from your eyes, you'll see something interesting: look at the flames shooting out of Brian Bruno's head right now. He's staring daggers right at the Royals, like he wants to slide into the ring right now and re-live his old football days. Bruno's never forgotten that brutal beating that the Foundation gave to him when he was the odd man out at Lethal Lottery, and he hasn't had an opportunity to get back at them with even numbers. With Mr. Can---I mean, Rex Caliber, in his corner, however... BILL HEWSON: Bruno's playing it smart, however. He knows that Mr. Canada will be coming to the ring in a matter of seconds... perhaps HE can carry on the Rex Caliber legacy... and instead of charging into the ring, he's staying at the middle of the ramp. JACK JONES: Kissing that plaque of his? BILL HEWSON: Yeah, Jack Jones, I always wanted to ask you, what's the deal with that plaque of his? He kisses it before every match but hasn't told us what it's all about. JACK JONES: Got me, Hewson. Family hierloom? Maybe it's a Heisman trophy that was run over by a truck or something. Either way, kissing that plaque's seems to be working for him here in NAPW, even though it doesn't compare to what I used to kiss before my matches! BILL HEWSON: Your opponents' ass? Thank you, I'll be here all night, and here's Mr. Canada! Before Jack Jones can get in another word, Big Sugar's "O Canada" plays. With the help of the fans in attendance, Mr. Canada walks out to the ring, waving a Canadian flag, to a big pop. His 245 lbs. of pure muscle strain against his red and white bodysuit, while his bald dome is only partially covered by the maple leaf mask. When he reaches Brian Bruno at the middle of the ramp, he implores the big fella to join in with the fans singing "O Canada," and waves his flag to the tune of the song. The Chicago native still looks furious, but can't help but join in. It's not until the song is over does this makeshift team slide underneath the ropes, pumped and ready to go. FRANK WARBURTON: Their opponents! They weigh in at a combined five hundred and sixteen pounds! "Big BAD"---BRIAN BRUNO! and, MR. CAAAANAAADDAAA! As the referee for this evening's contest, Morgan Smythe, checks each individual wrestler for foreign objects, she can't help but chuckle as the oh-so-familar Mr. Canada waves the Canadian flag while she checks on him. As the smaller, faster Prince Darko elects to begin the match for the Royal Foundation, there is little doubt who will for the makeshifts, as "Big Bad" Brian Bruno has already planted himself in the center of the ring. BILL HEWSON: Brian Bruno looks ready to tear Prince Darko to shreds... really makes me wish that he had gotten some counseling from Rex Caliber himself, y'know? Mr. Canada's teachings can only do so much... JACK JONES: Your credibility dwindles by the second, Hewson. Just so you're aware. Ding ding ding goes the bell, and we're ready to begin. But Brian Bruno's bringing ready BACK, and Prince Darko just don't know how to ACT! Bruno runs right at Darko and levels him with the punch to the head. Darko bounds right back up and gets a left for his troubles. Bruno picks up a felled Darko this time, and begins clubbing him in the back of the head with meaty forearms that leave Darko crawling for the corner. Brian Bruno's got the fire in his eyes, his family's been through enough trouble at the Foundation's hands to last a lifetime, and he's got Darko firmly in the crosshairs. Bruno grabs Darko forcefully by the throat, in the corner, and carries him from in, lifting him up, almost to the top of the Butterdome, and letting him fall with a powerful gorilla press slam that invigorates the crowd, electrifies Mr. Canada, and bewilders Thomas Young! Darko crawls to his corner to quickly mull over strategy with Young and decides on a good one: I'm getting the hell out of this ring. Young reluctantly tags in, as Bruno beckons him to "just bring it." Young stalls for a second, waiting to pick up a head of steam, and runs straight for the former Jet. Big mistake, your highness. Bruno takes quick advantage of Young's momentum, picks him up, and drills him straight into the ground with a powerful spinebuster! He goes for the pin, but pulls Young up at two before Smythe can register the three count. BILL HEWSON: Why did Bruno do that, Jack Jones? JACK JONES: I'd say that to Brian, tonight, beating up on the Royal Foundation may be even more important than actually beating them in the match. They've put his family through quite a bit of torment, do we need to bring up his son, Aaron?... plus, with Rex Caliber in his corner, Bruno probably figures he'll never a chance like thi--- BILL HEWSON: Rex Caliber's in Bruno's corner?! Aw, Jack, you had me fooled there for a second! It's just Mr. Canada! The quizzical look from Smythe is ignored as Bruno picks up Young and tosses him into the corner. Hewson makes note of the fact that Young is only slightly smaller than Bruno and yet was tossed aside like a damn rag doll. Bruno's going to work now, KNIFE EDGE chops to the chest of Thomas Young draws a strong response from the crowd. WOO! WOO2! WOO3! And a clothesline for good measure! Bruno's apparently getting adventurous now, as he lifts Young up to the top rope. This isn't exactly his backyard, but he makes it look so by keeping Young off-guard with shots to the chin. Looks like he's setting Thomas Young in the position for... a gorilla press slam off the top rope?! That'd probably finish the Royal off right here, right now, and that sounds like the kind of thing that's appealing to Brian Bruno at the moment... the moment doesn't last long, however. Prince Darko regains his composure and distracts Morgan Smythe by attempting to get into the ring. Morgan's having NONE of that, though, and goes to stop him... giving Thomas Young the perfect opportunity to low-blow Brian Bruno and stop the top-rope gorilla press in its tracks! Bruno's now perched in a precarious position at the top, he's all open... modified Young Cutter from Thomas Young sends Bruno to the ground in a heap! Darko stops the bumrush long enough to let Smythe begin the double count, and she gets to three before a tired Thomas Young starts to stir. Five, and he's on his knees, with Bruno still out. Eight, he's on his feet, with Bruno to his knees. Nine! Bruno finally makes it to his feet, while Young tags in Prince Darko! BILL HEWSON: A fresh Prince Darko makes it a bad way for Brian Bruno right now! JACK JONES: A fresh prince, eh? Hehe. Prince Darko bounds over the top rope and makes a run right at Brian Bruno, wasting no time in leveling his already-injured head with a running DDT! Darko goes for the pin but can only manage two, as Brian Bruno's showing some resiliancy. Darko drags Bruno to his feet in a hurry and sets him up in the position for what he calls, Monarchy, or his fisherman brainbuster, but Bruno's fighting it for all he's worth. Punches to the abdomen and chest weaken Prince Darko, but he still holds the suplex position intact. Darko lifts up Bruno, going for the brainbuster, but Bruno lands back on his feet! The crowd is firmly behind Bruno at this point, as Mr. Canada PUMPS 'EM UP for all that their worth! Mr. Canada begins a "BRU-NO! BRU-NO!" chant to keep his partner's head afloat, as Darko lifts Bruno up again! This time he makes the flip, but... it seems he didn't hit the brainbuster! JACK JONES: Oh wow, excellent move by Brian Bruno! While he couldn't fight his way out of that suplex position, he positioned his body so that his back would take the fall---a vertical suplex---instead of his neck getting hit with that brainbuster. Bruno may still be in a bad way, but it could've been a lot worse! A frustrated Prince Darko tries to lock on an STO, but Brian Bruno ain't having it. He's taking advantage of his size with stiff right forearms to the forehead and chest of Darko every time he tries to lock it on. Darko finally gives up on the submission holds and decides to make a go at it with his quickness, felling Bruno with a running dropkick. Darko figures that this appears to work, and thusly scales the top rope. Natural progression? Not for Darko, notes Jack Jones, who's more of a technical/power wrestler despite his size. Darko's sizing up Bruno, more than half of the ring away, and finally makes a leap towards him as Bruno rises---couldn't get enough air behind that one! Prince Darko went for a body press, but Bruno caught him, spun, took a step and viciously SLAMMED his rival into the mat, at the center of the ring, with a vicious running bodyslam! Mr. Canada is literally jumping on the bottom rope, the crowd is going banana, and Brian Bruno is... dead tired. He hasn't enjoyed rest at any point in this match, and cannot maintain the momentum for a follow-up move to Darko. That's okay, though. Mr. Canada will. MORGAN SMYTHE: 1... 2... "BRU-NO!"... 3... "BRU-NO!" ... 4... "BRU-RON!" ... 5... "BRU-RON!" ... 6... "AA-RON!" "AA-RON!" "AA-RON!" JACK JONES: Th-that's the name of Brian Bruno's son! The Royal Foundation has tortured this man and his boy in recent weeks! BILL HEWSON: And Brian Bruno has RESPONDED! The man is to his feet, along with Prince Darko this time, and he's headed towards Mr. Canada, who's just DYING to get in! JACK JONES: And the crowd is dying to see him in! Aaaand... Bruno makes the tag to Mr. Caliber! Er, Mr. Canada! Prince Darko makes the tag to Young! Young running full speed towards Mr. Canada, clothesline attempt, big mistake! Mr. Canada ducks it, back waistlock, RELEASE EDMONTON SUPLEX to Thomas Young! Prince Darko to his feet now, he makes a run at Mr. Canada, gets met with a SASKATOON STO! Darko down now, just in time for Young to make it back to his feet! Mr. Canada levels him with... a clothesline? CANADA CLOTHESLINE! Young to the outside! Darko back to his feet now, running, Mr. Canada with a drop toe hold and LOCKS IT IN---CIRCLES OF CALGARY to Prince Darko! The Prince is tapping, he's tapping, this match is over and Brian Bruno has his revenge! Well, not quite, reminds Morgan Smythe. He's not the legal man. This draws the crowd's ire, who let Smythe know, but hey, rules is rules. Mr. Canada's got nothing but respect, though, and despite his disappointment he kicks Prince Darko aside without squabble. But... where is Thomas Young? The big man... is to the top rope. With Mr. Canada in his crosshairs. BILL HEWSON: MR. CANADA, LOOK OUT BEHIND YOU!!! Thomas Young FLIES at Mr. Canada with a double axe handle slam---that's not his game!---and Mr. Canada REMINDS him of it with an atomic drop reversal! Thomas Young is jumping up and down in pain, and Mr. Canada makes a tag to Brian Bruno. Big pop? You betcha! Bruno climbs into the ring and lifts Young up on his shoulders, as Mr. Canada heroically scales the top rope! How 'bout a DON CHERRY DEVICE in the center of the ring, to fell Thomas Young! Bruno with the cover, Smythe with the count as Mr. Canada mauls Prince Darko on the outside! 1... 2... 3! Brian Bruno gets the duke! FRANK WARBURTON: Here are YOUR winners... "BIG BAD" BRIAN BRUNO, and MR. CANNNNNADDDAAA! BILL HEWSON: HUGE win for Brian Bruno and Mr. Canada tonight! Bruno gets a measure of revenge for all the torment he's gone through since the Lethal Lottery, and Mr. Canada shows us what it's like to be a true Canadian hero! Jack Jones, you know who'd really love to have seen this? Rex Caliber! JACK JONES: Oh, would you cut it out with that nonsense already! Mr. Canada did almost all of Rex's moves tonight, the STO, the german suplex, the Rings of Rex... none of that is weird to you at all? BILL HEWSON: Nope, Jack. None at all. Mr. Canada and Rex Caliber are best friends, you know that, right? JACK JONES: ... I give up. BILL HEWSON: But I DO know what is weird! Prince Darko has left ringside, he ran through the crowd to get the hell out of dodge before there's a Canadian revolution. He must be late for a coronation. Anyway, Thomas Young is laying the middle of the ring right now, with Brian Bruno and Mr. Canada just... staring at him. Sizing him up. What could they have in mind? Indeed, what? Mr. Canada suddenly looks like a lightbulb went off in that bald dome of his, and taps Brian Bruno on the shoulder, whispering in his ear. Bruno looks like he approves of whatever idea Mr. Canada conjured up, and motions to the backstage area... and out walks Brian Bruno's son, Aaron! He looks more than a little nervous to be in front of a sold-out Butterdome crowd, but no more nervous than he was when the Royal Foundation was making life miserable for him and his poppa. Bruno goes out to meet him halfway and give the boy a hug, drawing a huge "awww" from the fans in attendance. Before the scene can get too mushy, though. Mr. Canada waves the two back into the ring. Brian Bruno whispers something in his son's ear, and suddenly the boy's nervous expression is replaced with an ear-to-ear grin. It's reciprocated by Mr. Canada, who's now lifted Thomas Young up by the arm and has him in a standing armbar. Brian Bruno quickly slaps on the same hold to his other arm, leaving Thomas Young standing prone in front of Aaron Bruno. Looking like a young John Hall, Aaron lines up a few yards in front of Young, makes a run at him, and kicks him right in the junk! BILL HEWSON: THROUGH THE UPRIGHTS! JACK JONES: ...You're ENJOYING this?! Thomas Young rolls out of the ring in pain. "O Canada" kicks back up. Mr. Canada raises Bruno's arm high in victory! Then, Bruno lifts his son onto his shoulders. Crowd pops like crazy, what a great moment in NAPW wrestling! |